BluObieZ

Yes, you read that correctly Orion Slade has retired. But why Robbie? Well it’s really quite simple you simpleton. He ran his course; he was not allowed to be around for another season. Not like he actually played a game in the last few seasons because of my own choice. But in general I was bored by the player. I missed a few key posting milestones I wanted with him to help build up his story, because you know that for me the story is far more important then actual player themselves. So once I missed the post milestones. I kind of just lost interest in the player which actually made it a lot easier to just tell all VHL teams to fuck off and he will not sign a contract for his final two seasons. I turned down a few offers in his second last season, but for his last season there were no offers. Go ahead. Try to laugh. I would have turned them down. All of them. I think teams knew I would turn them down so they just didn’t send me offers. What a shame huh? One last chance to fuck around and shatter teams dreams of landing me. Nah as I said by his last season, teams either didn’t want me because of who I am or didn’t want to send me an offer because they knew I would say fuck off, or because Orion was a shitty player. He really was. I’ll be the first to admit it.
 
While I promised that Orion’s last two seasons would be one massive fuck you to everyone and the “League” that didn’t really come to be. I got busy with my family. COVID hit and fucked everything up. Then summer hit and I’m legit spending almost every day up at my cottage. So you know… life got in the way of me shoving one massive middle finger up the leagues collective breed hole (because I cannot say the C word)
 
But looking beyond why he retired now. You really must be here because you heard this was going to be an epic goodbye. One last fuck you to everyone. The grand finale for the King Robbie Zimmers. The asshole, the trolliest of trolls, The Ego, Ego and the list goes on and on.
 
Where are you going with this Robbie? You know most people post a few lines when the retire but this is long. Well first off fuck you. Secondly this ain’t long. If you were around for my grand Script MS’s that were 2000-3000 words, then you know that this isn’t long at all. This is actually me trying to keep this short and sweet. So sit down and shut up. Drink your extra large coke you fat ass and continue to read. If you are too dumb to comprehend what is being said, then first off you are dumb and secondly get someone to read it to you as a bedtime story.  This is a story of a man who a few times offered to buy this shitty thing you call a league. For actual money. Yes, you read that right. So I think you sitting there and reading all of this is warranted.
 
Now back to the retirement. As you can tell gone are the days where I post 2000-3000 word MS’s because I was bored, 3hr podcasts just because it was funny to annoy people, me running around the site just causing pure mayhem which forced the hands of the blue crew to ban me for a while which happened at least ten times in my grand “career” here in this... “League” Hell I have whole rules in the “league” that are there because of me. Don’t believe me? I had clauses built into contracts that guaranteed me that if the team sucked I would be move to a team I picked. I had other clauses that fucked the team even more. The blue crew stepped in and said no more would that be allowed. I am also the reason why your players have to be from earth. Yes I had a player born in space in a effort to pick good world cup teams. I am probably the sole reason why they crackdown on trolls and bullies around here. I’ve been the longest running troll around here. Others came and went or got banned for good. While some (and you know who you are) cried (literally like a little baby) that why I was not booted and not allowed back. I set off hundred-page argument threads, where I would argue with everyone in there. Why? Because I was fucking bored and I find mayhem fun. Call my bullshit on that? I literally would stand on the sidewalk and watch your house burn down, not call 911 I’d just watch it burn. Knowing full well that me not calling means you would lose your house. Now I must point out that I did not say you were inside your burning house, so settle down simple jack.
 
With all the fun I had over the many years around here, the last few ones I literally lost interest in everything. I couldn’t be bothered to even troll people. I disappeared twice for about a year each time. Then when I had sometime I would circle back to see what kind of shit I could cause around here. But now, to say that I am even remotely active would be a massive fucking lie. I’m not active. I came around to claim welfare and then fuck off for a week. I was literally claiming welfare for a player that was not on a team for the last two seasons. Why? Well… I thought I would come around a little more because COVID was raping the world and film shut down so other then being a father 24/7 I nothing else to do. But that didn’t shape up at all. Instead of COVID making me more active, it made me less active. I had a full plan to come around here and just poke fun everyone and things around the site. Posting status updates about my free agent player etc. But like many of my plans for Orion that also failed. Not that I give a fuck. But let’s be honest, that last plan went south much like winning a ton of cups did.
 
Which brings me to today. The retirement. The final fuck you. But before I do. I would like to channel my inner O.J. Simpson (He wrote “If I done it” and put out one last hypothetical thing. “If I would have stay”
 
If I would have stay I would have made one “last” player.
His Name: Rodney Ravage
Position: LW or RW
Story: Wild West outlaw runs his horse into a wormhole after robbing a train filled with gold. He appears in modern time. Now stinking rich because of the gold.
 
He probably would have become one of my most outlandish players ever. Keep in mind one of my players was born in space. But I had a grand plan for Rodney. I will not go into detail about it. But it wasn’t all about his story. It was going to be a well thought out entertaining sideshow that this “league” has never seen before. I will not tell you exactly what the plan was because well… that’s for me to know and you not to. But I would have done it, it would have annoyed the people that normally get worked up by things I do. That’s for sure… that’s putting it lightly.
 
But anyways. I think it’s that time. “NO!!!!! Robbie don’t leave” I have to fuck face. It’s time. “But what about the twist” you guys don’t deserve to hear my twist. You aren’t worthy to hear it. But! Having said that. Here is a new twist I just thought of. Consider it a pity twist since you guys aren’t worthy of hearing my grand finale twist. So here goes the pity twist. Instead of telling specific people to fuck off etc… I will make one general grand fuck you to all of you. Because no one deserves to be named by “name” on my retirement speech. No on has affected me so much that I would mention them in a good or bad way. So I will lump you all into the same shitty bunch. So here I go. Fuck you! All of you. I am better than everyone of you. Always have been, always will be. Robbie Out…
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Or am I really out? Am I really out? Or have I just announced that I am making a new player? I guess you will have to wait and see if I am gone or I will make Rodney. Time will tell. Now have a fucky night.
 

Don't care if you cared. I knew this was the reaction this would get. You care enough to post in here. Stop caring bro.

Yes, you read that correctly Orion Slade has retired. But why Robbie? Well it’s really quite simple you simpleton. He ran his course; he was not allowed to be around for another season. Not like he actually played a game in the last few seasons because of my own choice. But in general I was bored by the player. I missed a few key posting milestones I wanted with him to help build up his story, because you know that for me the story is far more important then actual player themselves. So once I missed the post milestones. I kind of just lost interest in the player which actually made it a lot easier to just tell all VHL teams to fuck off and he will not sign a contract for his final two seasons. I turned down a few offers in his second last season, but for his last season there were no offers. Go ahead. Try to laugh. I would have turned them down. All of them. I think teams knew I would turn them down so they just didn’t send me offers. What a shame huh? One last chance to fuck around and shatter teams dreams of landing me. Nah as I said by his last season, teams either didn’t want me because of who I am or didn’t want to send me an offer because they knew I would say fuck off, or because Orion was a shitty player. He really was. I’ll be the first to admit it.
 
While I promised that Orion’s last two seasons would be one massive fuck you to everyone and the “League” that didn’t really come to be. I got busy with my family. COVID hit and fucked everything up. Then summer hit and I’m legit spending almost every day up at my cottage. So you know… life got in the way of me shoving one massive middle finger up the leagues collective breed hole (because I cannot say the C word)
 
But looking beyond why he retired now. You really must be here because you heard this was going to be an epic goodbye. One last fuck you to everyone. The grand finale for the King Robbie Zimmers. The asshole, the trolliest of trolls, The Ego, Ego and the list goes on and on.
 
Where are you going with this Robbie? You know most people post a few lines when the retire but this is long. Well first off fuck you. Secondly this ain’t long. If you were around for my grand Script MS’s that were 2000-3000 words, then you know that this isn’t long at all. This is actually me trying to keep this short and sweet. So sit down and shut up. Drink your extra large coke you fat ass and continue to read. If you are too dumb to comprehend what is being said, then first off you are dumb and secondly get someone to read it to you as a bedtime story.  This is a story of a man who a few times offered to buy this shitty thing you call a league. For actual money. Yes, you read that right. So I think you sitting there and reading all of this is warranted.
 
Now back to the retirement. As you can tell gone are the days where I post 2000-3000 word MS’s because I was bored, 3hr podcasts just because it was funny to annoy people, me running around the site just causing pure mayhem which forced the hands of the blue crew to ban me for a while which happened at least ten times in my grand “career” here in this... “League” Hell I have whole rules in the “league” that are there because of me. Don’t believe me? I had clauses built into contracts that guaranteed me that if the team sucked I would be move to a team I picked. I had other clauses that fucked the team even more. The blue crew stepped in and said no more would that be allowed. I am also the reason why your players have to be from earth. Yes I had a player born in space in a effort to pick good world cup teams. I am probably the sole reason why they crackdown on trolls and bullies around here. I’ve been the longest running troll around here. Others came and went or got banned for good. While some (and you know who you are) cried (literally like a little baby) that why I was not booted and not allowed back. I set off hundred-page argument threads, where I would argue with everyone in there. Why? Because I was fucking bored and I find mayhem fun. Call my bullshit on that? I literally would stand on the sidewalk and watch your house burn down, not call 911 I’d just watch it burn. Knowing full well that me not calling means you would lose your house. Now I must point out that I did not say you were inside your burning house, so settle down simple jack.
 
With all the fun I had over the many years around here, the last few ones I literally lost interest in everything. I couldn’t be bothered to even troll people. I disappeared twice for about a year each time. Then when I had sometime I would circle back to see what kind of shit I could cause around here. But now, to say that I am even remotely active would be a massive fucking lie. I’m not active. I came around to claim welfare and then fuck off for a week. I was literally claiming welfare for a player that was not on a team for the last two seasons. Why? Well… I thought I would come around a little more because COVID was raping the world and film shut down so other then being a father 24/7 I nothing else to do. But that didn’t shape up at all. Instead of COVID making me more active, it made me less active. I had a full plan to come around here and just poke fun everyone and things around the site. Posting status updates about my free agent player etc. But like many of my plans for Orion that also failed. Not that I give a fuck. But let’s be honest, that last plan went south much like winning a ton of cups did.
 
Which brings me to today. The retirement. The final fuck you. But before I do. I would like to channel my inner O.J. Simpson (He wrote “If I done it” and put out one last hypothetical thing. “If I would have stay”
 
If I would have stay I would have made one “last” player.
His Name: Rodney Ravage
Position: LW or RW
Story: Wild West outlaw runs his horse into a wormhole after robbing a train filled with gold. He appears in modern time. Now stinking rich because of the gold.
 
He probably would have become one of my most outlandish players ever. Keep in mind one of my players was born in space. But I had a grand plan for Rodney. I will not go into detail about it. But it wasn’t all about his story. It was going to be a well thought out entertaining sideshow that this “league” has never seen before. I will not tell you exactly what the plan was because well… that’s for me to know and you not to. But I would have done it, it would have annoyed the people that normally get worked up by things I do. That’s for sure… that’s putting it lightly.
 
But anyways. I think it’s that time. “NO!!!!! Robbie don’t leave” I have to fuck face. It’s time. “But what about the twist” you guys don’t deserve to hear my twist. You aren’t worthy to hear it. But! Having said that. Here is a new twist I just thought of. Consider it a pity twist since you guys aren’t worthy of hearing my grand finale twist. So here goes the pity twist. Instead of telling specific people to fuck off etc… I will make one general grand fuck you to all of you. Because no one deserves to be named by “name” on my retirement speech. No on has affected me so much that I would mention them in a good or bad way. So I will lump you all into the same shitty bunch. So here I go. Fuck you! All of you. I am better than everyone of you. Always have been, always will be. Robbie Out…
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Or am I really out? Am I really out? Or have I just announced that I am making a new player? I guess you will have to wait and see if I am gone or I will make Rodney. Time will tell. Now have a fucky night.
 

Yes, you read that correctly Orion Slade has retired. But why Robbie? Well it’s really quite simple you simpleton. He ran his course; he was not allowed to be around for another season. Not like he actually played a game in the last few seasons because of my own choice. But in general I was bored by the player. I missed a few key posting milestones I wanted with him to help build up his story, because you know that for me the story is far more important then actual player themselves. So once I missed the post milestones. I kind of just lost interest in the player which actually made it a lot easier to just tell all VHL teams to fuck off and he will not sign a contract for his final two seasons. I turned down a few offers in his second last season, but for his last season there were no offers. Go ahead. Try to laugh. I would have turned them down. All of them. I think teams knew I would turn them down so they just didn’t send me offers. What a shame huh? One last chance to fuck around and shatter teams dreams of landing me. Nah as I said by his last season, teams either didn’t want me because of who I am or didn’t want to send me an offer because they knew I would say fuck off, or because Orion was a shitty player. He really was. I’ll be the first to admit it.
 
While I promised that Orion’s last two seasons would be one massive fuck you to everyone and the “League” that didn’t really come to be. I got busy with my family. COVID hit and fucked everything up. Then summer hit and I’m legit spending almost every day up at my cottage. So you know… life got in the way of me shoving one massive middle finger up the leagues collective breed hole (because I cannot say the C word)
 
But looking beyond why he retired now. You really must be here because you heard this was going to be an epic goodbye. One last fuck you to everyone. The grand finale for the King Robbie Zimmers. The asshole, the trolliest of trolls, The Ego, Ego and the list goes on and on.
 
Where are you going with this Robbie? You know most people post a few lines when the retire but this is long. Well first off fuck you. Secondly this ain’t long. If you were around for my grand Script MS’s that were 2000-3000 words, then you know that this isn’t long at all. This is actually me trying to keep this short and sweet. So sit down and shut up. Drink your extra large coke you fat ass and continue to read. If you are too dumb to comprehend what is being said, then first off you are dumb and secondly get someone to read it to you as a bedtime story.  This is a story of a man who a few times offered to buy this shitty thing you call a league. For actual money. Yes, you read that right. So I think you sitting there and reading all of this is warranted.
 
Now back to the retirement. As you can tell gone are the days where I post 2000-3000 word MS’s because I was bored, 3hr podcasts just because it was funny to annoy people, me running around the site just causing pure mayhem which forced the hands of the blue crew to ban me for a while which happened at least ten times in my grand “career” here in this... “League” Hell I have whole rules in the “league” that are there because of me. Don’t believe me? I had clauses built into contracts that guaranteed me that if the team sucked I would be move to a team I picked. I had other clauses that fucked the team even more. The blue crew stepped in and said no more would that be allowed. I am also the reason why your players have to be from earth. Yes I had a player born in space in a effort to pick good world cup teams. I am probably the sole reason why they crackdown on trolls and bullies around here. I’ve been the longest running troll around here. Others came and went or got banned for good. While some (and you know who you are) cried (literally like a little baby) that why I was not booted and not allowed back. I set off hundred-page argument threads, where I would argue with everyone in there. Why? Because I was fucking bored and I find mayhem fun. Call my bullshit on that? I literally would stand on the sidewalk and watch your house burn down, not call 911 I’d just watch it burn. Knowing full well that me not calling means you would lose your house. Now I must point out that I did not say you were inside your burning house, so settle down simple jack.
 
With all the fun I had over the many years around here, the last few ones I literally lost interest in everything. I couldn’t be bothered to even troll people. I disappeared twice for about a year each time. Then when I had sometime I would circle back to see what kind of shit I could cause around here. But now, to say that I am even remotely active would be a massive fucking lie. I’m not active. I came around to claim welfare and then fuck off for a week. I was literally claiming welfare for a player that was not on a team for the last two seasons. Why? Well… I thought I would come around a little more because COVID was raping the world and film shut down so other then being a father 24/7 I nothing else to do. But that didn’t shape up at all. Instead of COVID making me more active, it made me less active. I had a full plan to come around here and just poke fun everyone and things around the site. Posting status updates about my free agent player etc. But like many of my plans for Orion that also failed. Not that I give a fuck. But let’s be honest, that last plan went south much like winning a ton of cups did.
 
Which brings me to today. The retirement. The final fuck you. But before I do. I would like to channel my inner O.J. Simpson (He wrote “If I done it” and put out one last hypothetical thing. “If I would have stay”
 
If I would have stay I would have made one “last” player.
His Name: Rodney Ravage
Position: LW or RW
Story: Wild West outlaw runs his horse into a wormhole after robbing a train filled with gold. He appears in modern time. Now stinking rich because of the gold.
 
He probably would have become one of my most outlandish players ever. Keep in mind one of my players was born in space. But I had a grand plan for Rodney. I will not go into detail about it. But it wasn’t all about his story. It was going to be a well thought out entertaining sideshow that this “league” has never seen before. I will not tell you exactly what the plan was because well… that’s for me to know and you not to. But I would have done it, it would have annoyed the people that normally get worked up by things I do. That’s for sure… that’s putting it lightly.
 
But anyways. I think it’s that time. “NO!!!!! Robbie don’t leave” I have to fuck face. It’s time. “But what about the twist” you guys don’t deserve to hear my twist. You aren’t worthy to hear it. But! Having said that. Here is a new twist I just thought of. Consider it a pity twist since you guys aren’t worthy of hearing my grand finale twist. So here goes the pity twist. Instead of telling specific people to fuck off etc… I will make one general grand fuck you to all of you. Because no one deserves to be named by “name” on my retirement speech. No on has affected me so much that I would mention them in a good or bad way. So I will lump you all into the same shitty bunch. So here I go. Fuck you! All of you. I am better than everyone of you. Always have been, always will be. Robbie Out…
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Or am I really out? Am I really out? Or have I just announced that I am making a new player? I guess you will have to wait and see if I am gone or I will make Rodney. Time will tell. Now have a fucky night.
 

Yes, you read that correctly Orion Slade has retired. But why Robbie? Well it’s really quite simple you simpleton. He ran his course; he was not allowed to be around for another season. Not like he actually played a game in the last few seasons because of my own choice. But in general I was bored by the player. I missed a few key posting milestones I wanted with him to help build up his story, because you know that for me the story is far more important then actual player themselves. So once I missed the post milestones. I kind of just lost interest in the player which actually made it a lot easier to just tell all VHL teams to fuck off and he will not sign a contract for his final two seasons. I turned down a few offers in his second last season, but for his last season there were no offers. Go ahead. Try to laugh. I would have turned them down. All of them. I think teams knew I would turn them down so they just didn’t send me offers. What a shame huh? One last chance to fuck around and shatter teams dreams of landing me. Nah as I said by his last season, teams either didn’t want me because of who I am or didn’t want to send me an offer because they knew I would say fuck off, or because Orion was a shitty player. He really was. I’ll be the first to admit it.
 
While I promised that Orion’s last two seasons would be one massive fuck you to everyone and the “League” that didn’t really come to be. I got busy with my family. COVID hit and fucked everything up. Then summer hit and I’m legit spending almost every day up at my cottage. So you know… life got in the way of me shoving one massive middle finger up the leagues collective breed hole (because I cannot say the C word)
 
But looking beyond why he retired now. You really must be here because you heard this was going to be an epic goodbye. One last fuck you to everyone. The grand finale for the King Robbie Zimmers. The asshole, the trolliest of trolls, The Ego, Ego and the list goes on and on.
 
Where are you going with this Robbie? You know most people post a few lines when the retire but this is long. Well first off fuck you. Secondly this ain’t long. If you were around for my grand Script MS’s that were 2000-3000 words, then you know that this isn’t long at all. This is actually me trying to keep this short and sweet. So sit down and shut up. Drink your extra large coke you fat ass and continue to read. If you are too dumb to comprehend what is being said, then first off you are dumb and secondly get someone to read it to you as a bedtime story.  This is a story of a man who a few times offered to buy this shitty thing you call a league. For actual money. Yes, you read that right. So I think you sitting there and reading all of this is warranted.
 
Now back to the retirement. As you can tell gone are the days where I post 2000-3000 word MS’s because I was bored, 3hr podcasts just because it was funny to annoy people, me running around the site just causing pure mayhem which forced the hands of the blue crew to ban me for a while which happened at least ten times in my grand “career” here in this... “League” Hell I have whole rules in the “league” that are there because of me. Don’t believe me? I had clauses built into contracts that guaranteed me that if the team sucked I would be move to a team I picked. I had other clauses that fucked the team even more. The blue crew stepped in and said no more would that be allowed. I am also the reason why your players have to be from earth. Yes I had a player born in space in a effort to pick good world cup teams. I am probably the sole reason why they crackdown on trolls and bullies around here. I’ve been the longest running troll around here. Others came and went or got banned for good. While some (and you know who you are) cried (literally like a little baby) that why I was not booted and not allowed back. I set off hundred-page argument threads, where I would argue with everyone in there. Why? Because I was fucking bored and I find mayhem fun. Call my bullshit on that? I literally would stand on the sidewalk and watch your house burn down, not call 911 I’d just watch it burn. Knowing full well that me not calling means you would lose your house. Now I must point out that I did not say you were inside your burning house, so settle down simple jack.
 
With all the fun I had over the many years around here, the last few ones I literally lost interest in everything. I couldn’t be bothered to even troll people. I disappeared twice for about a year each time. Then when I had sometime I would circle back to see what kind of shit I could cause around here. But now, to say that I am even remotely active would be a massive fucking lie. I’m not active. I came around to claim welfare and then fuck off for a week. I was literally claiming welfare for a player that was not on a team for the last two seasons. Why? Well… I thought I would come around a little more because COVID was raping the world and film shut down so other then being a father 24/7 I nothing else to do. But that didn’t shape up at all. Instead of COVID making me more active, it made me less active. I had a full plan to come around here and just poke fun everyone and things around the site. Posting status updates about my free agent player etc. But like many of my plans for Orion that also failed. Not that I give a fuck. But let’s be honest, that last plan went south much like winning a ton of cups did.
 
Which brings me to today. The retirement. The final fuck you. But before I do. I would like to channel my inner O.J. Simpson (He wrote “If I done it” and put out one last hypothetical thing. “If I would have stay”
 
If I would have stay I would have made one “last” player.
His Name: Rodney Ravage
Position: LW or RW
Story: Wild West outlaw runs his horse into a wormhole after robbing a train filled with gold. He appears in modern time. Now stinking rich because of the gold.
 
He probably would have become one of my most outlandish players ever. Keep in mind one of my players was born in space. But I had a grand plan for Rodney. I will not go into detail about it. But it wasn’t all about his story. It was going to be a well thought out entertaining sideshow that this “league” has never seen before. I will not tell you exactly what the plan was because well… that’s for me to know and you not to. But I would have done it, it would have annoyed the people that normally get worked up by things I do. That’s for sure… that’s putting it lightly.
 
But anyways. I think it’s that time. “NO!!!!! Robbie don’t leave” I have to fuck face. It’s time. “But what about the twist” you guys don’t deserve to hear my twist. You aren’t worthy to hear it. But! Having said that. Here is a new twist I just thought of. Consider it a pity twist since you guys aren’t worthy of hearing my grand finale twist. So here goes the pity twist. Instead of telling specific people to fuck off etc… I will make one general grand fuck you to all of you. Because no one deserves to be named by “name” on my retirement speech. No on has affected me so much that I would mention them in a good or bad way. So I will lump you all into the same shitty bunch. So here I go. Fuck you! All of you. I am better than everyone of you. Always have been, always will be. Robbie Out…
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Or am I really out? Am I really out? Or have I just announced that I am making a new player? I guess you will have to wait and see if I am gone or I will make Rodney. Time will tell. Now have a fucky night.
 

Yes, you read that correctly Orion Slade has retired. But why Robbie? Well it’s really quite simple you simpleton. He ran his course; he was not allowed to be around for another season. Not like he actually played a game in the last few seasons because of my own choice. But in general I was bored by the player. I missed a few key posting milestones I wanted with him to help build up his story, because you know that for me the story is far more important then actual player themselves. So once I missed the post milestones. I kind of just lost interest in the player which actually made it a lot easier to just tell all VHL teams to fuck off and he will not sign a contract for his final two seasons. I turned down a few offers in his second last season, but for his last season there were no offers. Go ahead. Try to laugh. I would have turned them down. All of them. I think teams knew I would turn them down so they just didn’t send me offers. What a shame huh? One last chance to fuck around and shatter teams dreams of landing me. Nah as I said by his last season, teams either didn’t want me because of who I am or didn’t want to send me an offer because they knew I would say fuck off, or because Orion was a shitty player. He really was. I’ll be the first to admit it.
 
While I promised that Orion’s last two seasons would be one massive fuck you to everyone and the “League” that didn’t really come to be. I got busy with my family. COVID hit and fucked everything up. Then summer hit and I’m legit spending almost every day up at my cottage. So you know… life got in the way of me shoving one massive middle finger up the leagues collective breed hole (because I cannot say the C word)
 
But looking beyond why he retired now. You really must be here because you heard this was going to be an epic goodbye. One last fuck you to everyone. The grand finale for the King Robbie Zimmers. The asshole, the trolliest of trolls, The Ego, Ego and the list goes on and on.
 
Where are you going with this Robbie? You know most people post a few lines when the retire but this is long. Well first off fuck you. Secondly this ain’t long. If you were around for my grand Script MS’s that were 2000-3000 words, then you know that this isn’t long at all. This is actually me trying to keep this short and sweet. So sit down and shut up. Drink your extra large coke you fat ass and continue to read. If you are too dumb to comprehend what is being said, then first off you are dumb and secondly get someone to read it to you as a bedtime story.  This is a story of a man who a few times offered to buy this shitty thing you call a league. For actual money. Yes, you read that right. So I think you sitting there and reading all of this is warranted.
 
Now back to the retirement. As you can tell gone are the days where I post 2000-3000 word MS’s because I was bored, 3hr podcasts just because it was funny to annoy people, me running around the site just causing pure mayhem which forced the hands of the blue crew to ban me for a while which happened at least ten times in my grand “career” here in this... “League” Hell I have whole rules in the “league” that are there because of me. Don’t believe me? I had clauses built into contracts that guaranteed me that if the team sucked I would be move to a team I picked. I had other clauses that fucked the team even more. The blue crew stepped in and said no more would that be allowed. I am also the reason why your players have to be from earth. Yes I had a player born in space in a effort to pick good world cup teams. I am probably the sole reason why they crackdown on trolls and bullies around here. I’ve been the longest running troll around here. Others came and went or got banned for good. While some (and you know who you are) cried (literally like a little baby) that why I was not booted and not allowed back. I set off hundred-page argument threads, where I would argue with everyone in there. Why? Because I was fucking bored and I find mayhem fun. Call my bullshit on that? I literally would stand on the sidewalk and watch your house burn down, not call 911 I’d just watch it burn. Knowing full well that me not calling means you would lose your house. Now I must point out that I did not say you were inside your burning house, so settle down simple jack.
 
With all the fun I had over the many years around here, the last few ones I literally lost interest in everything. I couldn’t be bothered to even troll people. I disappeared twice for about a year each time. Then when I had sometime I would circle back to see what kind of shit I could cause around here. But now, to say that I am even remotely active would be a massive fucking lie. I’m not active. I came around to claim welfare and then fuck off for a week. I was literally claiming welfare for a player that was not on a team for the last two seasons. Why? Well… I thought I would come around a little more because COVID was raping the world and film shut down so other then being a father 24/7 I nothing else to do. But that didn’t shape up at all. Instead of COVID making me more active, it made me less active. I had a full plan to come around here and just poke fun everyone and things around the site. Posting status updates about my free agent player etc. But like many of my plans for Orion that also failed. Not that I give a fuck. But let’s be honest, that last plan went south much like winning a ton of cups did.
 
Which brings me to today. The retirement. The final fuck you. But before I do. I would like to channel my inner O.J. Simpson (He wrote “If I done it” and put out one last hypothetical thing. “If I would have stay”
 
If I would have stay I would have made one “last” player.
His Name: Rodney Ravage
Position: LW or RW
Story: Wild West outlaw runs his horse into a wormhole after robbing a train filled with gold. He appears in modern time. Now stinking rich because of the gold.
 
He probably would have become one of my most outlandish players ever. Keep in mind one of my players was born in space. But I had a grand plan for Rodney. I will not go into detail about it. But it wasn’t all about his story. It was going to be a well thought out entertaining sideshow that this “league” has never seen before. I will not tell you exactly what the plan was because well… that’s for me to know and you not to. But I would have done it, it would have annoyed the people that normally get worked up by things I do. That’s for sure… that’s putting it lightly.
 
But anyways. I think it’s that time. “NO!!!!! Robbie don’t leave” I have to fuck face. It’s time. “But what about the twist” you guys don’t deserve to hear my twist. You aren’t worthy to hear it. But! Having said that. Here is a new twist I just thought of. Consider it a pity twist since you guys aren’t worthy of hearing my grand finale twist. So here goes the pity twist. Instead of telling specific people to fuck off etc… I will make one general grand fuck you to all of you. Because no one deserves to be named by “name” on my retirement speech. No on has affected me so much that I would mention them in a good or bad way. So I will lump you all into the same shitty bunch. So here I go. Fuck you! All of you. I am better than everyone of you. Always have been, always will be. Robbie Out…
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Or am I really out? Am I really out? Or have I just announced that I am making a new player? I guess you will have to wait and see if I am gone or I will make Rodney. Time will tell. Now have a fucky night.
 

Yes, you read that correctly Orion Slade has retired. But why Robbie? Well it’s really quite simple you simpleton. He ran his course; he was not allowed to be around for another season. Not like he actually played a game in the last few seasons because of my own choice. But in general I was bored by the player. I missed a few key posting milestones I wanted with him to help build up his story, because you know that for me the story is far more important then actual player themselves. So once I missed the post milestones. I kind of just lost interest in the player which actually made it a lot easier to just tell all VHL teams to fuck off and he will not sign a contract for his final two seasons. I turned down a few offers in his second last season, but for his last season there were no offers. Go ahead. Try to laugh. I would have turned them down. All of them. I think teams knew I would turn them down so they just didn’t send me offers. What a shame huh? One last chance to fuck around and shatter teams dreams of landing me. Nah as I said by his last season, teams either didn’t want me because of who I am or didn’t want to send me an offer because they knew I would say fuck off, or because Orion was a shitty player. He really was. I’ll be the first to admit it.
 
While I promised that Orion’s last two seasons would be one massive fuck you to everyone and the “League” that didn’t really come to be. I got busy with my family. COVID hit and fucked everything up. Then summer hit and I’m legit spending almost every day up at my cottage. So you know… life got in the way of me shoving one massive middle finger up the leagues collective breed hole (because I cannot say the C word)
 
But looking beyond why he retired now. You really must be here because you heard this was going to be an epic goodbye. One last fuck you to everyone. The grand finale for the King Robbie Zimmers. The asshole, the trolliest of trolls, The Ego, Ego and the list goes on and on.
 
Where are you going with this Robbie? You know most people post a few lines when the retire but this is long. Well first off fuck you. Secondly this ain’t long. If you were around for my grand Script MS’s that were 2000-3000 words, then you know that this isn’t long at all. This is actually me trying to keep this short and sweet. So sit down and shut up. Drink your extra large coke you fat ass and continue to read. If you are too dumb to comprehend what is being said, then first off you are dumb and secondly get someone to read it to you as a bedtime story.  This is a story of a man who a few times offered to buy this shitty thing you call a league. For actual money. Yes, you read that right. So I think you sitting there and reading all of this is warranted.
 
Now back to the retirement. As you can tell gone are the days where I post 2000-3000 word MS’s because I was bored, 3hr podcasts just because it was funny to annoy people, me running around the site just causing pure mayhem which forced the hands of the blue crew to ban me for a while which happened at least ten times in my grand “career” here in this... “League” Hell I have whole rules in the “league” that are there because of me. Don’t believe me? I had clauses built into contracts that guaranteed me that if the team sucked I would be move to a team I picked. I had other clauses that fucked the team even more. The blue crew stepped in and said no more would that be allowed. I am also the reason why your players have to be from earth. Yes I had a player born in space in a effort to pick good world cup teams. I am probably the sole reason why they crackdown on trolls and bullies around here. I’ve been the longest running troll around here. Others came and went or got banned for good. While some (and you know who you are) cried (literally like a little baby) that why I was not booted and not allowed back. I set off hundred-page argument threads, where I would argue with everyone in there. Why? Because I was fucking bored and I find mayhem fun. Call my bullshit on that? I literally would stand on the sidewalk and watch your house burn down, not call 911 I’d just watch it burn. Knowing full well that me not calling means you would lose your house. Now I must point out that I did not say you were inside your burning house, so settle down simple jack.
 
With all the fun I had over the many years around here, the last few ones I literally lost interest in everything. I couldn’t be bothered to even troll people. I disappeared twice for about a year each time. Then when I had sometime I would circle back to see what kind of shit I could cause around here. But now, to say that I am even remotely active would be a massive fucking lie. I’m not active. I came around to claim welfare and then fuck off for a week. I was literally claiming welfare for a player that was not on a team for the last two seasons. Why? Well… I thought I would come around a little more because COVID was raping the world and film shut down so other then being a father 24/7 I nothing else to do. But that didn’t shape up at all. Instead of COVID making me more active, it made me less active. I had a full plan to come around here and just poke fun everyone and things around the site. Posting status updates about my free agent player etc. But like many of my plans for Orion that also failed. Not that I give a fuck. But let’s be honest, that last plan went south much like winning a ton of cups did.
 
Which brings me to today. The retirement. The final fuck you. But before I do. I would like to channel my inner O.J. Simpson (He wrote “If I done it” and put out one last hypothetical thing. “If I would have stay”
 
If I would have stay I would have made one “last” player.
His Name: Rodney Ravage
Position: LW or RW
Story: Wild West outlaw runs his horse into a wormhole after robbing a train filled with gold. He appears in modern time. Now stinking rich because of the gold.
 
He probably would have become one of my most outlandish players ever. Keep in mind one of my players was born in space. But I had a grand plan for Rodney. I will not go into detail about it. But it wasn’t all about his story. It was going to be a well thought out entertaining sideshow that this “league” has never seen before. I will not tell you exactly what the plan was because well… that’s for me to know and you not to. But I would have done it, it would have annoyed the people that normally get worked up by things I do. That’s for sure… that’s putting it lightly.
 
But anyways. I think it’s that time. “NO!!!!! Robbie don’t leave” I have to fuck face. It’s time. “But what about the twist” you guys don’t deserve to hear my twist. You aren’t worthy to hear it. But! Having said that. Here is a new twist I just thought of. Consider it a pity twist since you guys aren’t worthy of hearing my grand finale twist. So here goes the pity twist. Instead of telling specific people to fuck off etc… I will make one general grand fuck you to all of you. Because no one deserves to be named by “name” on my retirement speech. No on has affected me so much that I would mention them in a good or bad way. So I will lump you all into the same shitty bunch. So here I go. Fuck you! All of you. I am better than everyone of you. Always have been, always will be. Robbie Out…
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Or am I really out? Am I really out? Or have I just announced that I am making a new player? I guess you will have to wait and see if I am gone or I will make Rodney. Time will tell. Now have a fucky night.
 

Orion Slade is kicking it pool side in a undisclosed location (Mostly for his safety) The resort is empty and the workers all are basically his personal bitches. It's pretty much way better then what you morons are up to. Practicing hockey and playing hockey for some little championship. Oh my must not talk ill of the cup because you know, it's the leagues biggest and best award. If I make fun of it and devalue it, what's next? A line must be drawn Robbie! Where? in the fucking sand where Orion is? (Just to be clear, I am not anywhere. That would be stupid because then I would be stuck in some bum fuck country till I was allowed to fly. That and no planes flying are the only reason why I did not take my family and go south) Any fucking ways. While most of you sit on your hockey benches trying to claw your way up the teams depth chart to get big line minutes, Orion downs rum and cokes like it's going out of style. He has a beach all to himself and yes he is really and I mean REALLY enjoying this "Free agency Retirement" thing. You would be thinking that this will change his fucking ways so that maybe next off season going into his last "season" he can actually listen to offers instead of saying no. Nope! He is looking forward to denying every team that comes knocking because well... It's fucking fun and aren't all here trying to have fun? Do you think what you are doing is fun because it's not. Enjoy it if you want but deep down inside you find all this league boring and it's stupid members boring. You have been thinking for a while how to spice things up, how to make this more fun so you don't become inactive. Well maybe you should take Orion's lead and have fun. But you wouldn't know what fun is even if it hit you in the face in Iqaluit Nunavut. 

2. FUCK NO! Not a chance in bloody fucking hell
3. They will scored more than you guys will. Mark my words. This question will be the "TSN Turning point" and your team mates will blame you for jinxing the team. Which is a good thing.
4. I have a theory but that can be viewed as picking a fight so I will not say it out loud
6. Neither. Both are stupid. Like your... 
7. LOL NO
8. Your mom

EP1
Isn't it funny that the Coronavirus and being a Free Agent has made me more active? lol

6. They did what they did and it had to be done. 
7. Who the fuck is he? why should I care?
8. Orion Slade. 0points 0 games played. Plays for no one.  Go team Free agent
9. Team Orion Slade. Dudes legit a beast.
10. Offer Bushito crack. He likes crack. 
11. Kick back and make fun of the league for the season. 

EP1
Isn't it funny that the Coronavirus and being a Free Agent has made me more active? lol

EP1
Isn't it funny that the Coronavirus and being a Free Agent has made me more active? lol

People must be wondering why I am sticking around because my player Orion Slade is a free agent this season and is "doomed" to be one the whole season. Well that your little opinion now isn't it?  You think that the purpose of this league is to play in games and such. Well you are wrong. Sure yeah it's a hockey league and you should be on a team. Blah. Blah. Blah. You got me there but my point is that everyone has forgotten is that this league is also about having fun. It's up to you the player to define what you call fun. So if you want to be a good little doggy and do what you "should" then sure go ahead, be on a team. Be nice to your team mates and hate other teams. I know how it is. I've been around far too long to not know how people are expected to act. Well as you know from day one I have fought that norm in the league. I am the one guy who looks to break all the norms and have fun doing it. Sure me having fun has crossed lines and suspensions have been handed down. But guess what? I am still here. I am a free agent and I am still here doing Point tasks. Do you honestly think I will go inactive because technically my point tasks have no reason since I have no team. Don't you think I thought this whole thing out? Because believe you me, I have thought this out and my final two "seasons" (If you can call being a free agent a season) are going to be fucking amazing and trust me now that I have no team I actually don't have a GM telling me to not be me and that don't say things because it may upset the little babies on the team and in the league. I played nice ninety percent of the time. But now that I don't have to. The true Robbie can come out and play, and trust me when I say this. It will be Shit Show Spectacular. I won't cross lines. Oh no. I will tip toe close to them but won't cross them. Me making these point tasks and claiming them, is me being an active "productive" member of this league. So they can't ban me for "he has no intention of being production and just being an ass" Well if I am making point tasks and claiming them, that makes me a "productive member" of this so called league. So I will leave this off with this. Grab some popcorn and a Corona and enjoy the Shit Show Spectacular, because it's going to be a wild final two seasons. 

1. Russian Vodka pool party. Yes thats a pool filled with Russian Vodka
2. Orion Slade. He refuses to sign with anyone but that doesn't stop them from inquiring 
3. Did you get Phillip J Frye back? I answer your question with a question. Hahahaha fuck you
4. No fucks given
5. Hard to say since I gace zero fucks about either. Not because I didn't care about them specifically. Mostly because I don't care about anyone
27. He wins after wimping out and calling the police on me upon my arrival. I  can't win if I'm handcuffed so he would win by count out

26. I'm prank calling to make you think your parents died
27. A team, the one that everyone thinks. I don't pay attention.
29. The worst team in the league. Usually finishes last. Makes sense
30. Fuck Calgary and that shit head that "runs" them
32. The guy who's on top of the goals list at the end of the season. Duh!
35. Couldn't give a fuck less about it. I am either not picking up my option and leaving. Or i am handcuffing the team and getting bought out
 

I don't remember. I think I just stumbled on them. Lucky you guys huh?

Orion Slade recently ended a long stand off with the Seattle Bears. The team and him were at loggerheads over his player option on next year which came with a NTC. Orion claimed that he would make them wait till the last possible second before he would make up his mind. Well... That didn't happen because about 4 days before the deadline he opted out of the option, thus setting himself free and allowing Seattle out of a financial "hold up"  But why would a Robbie Player back down from such a opportunity to make a spectacle about something that would have had people following to the end? Well if you ask Robbie Zimmers the agent for Orion Slade he says "This was the plan, if would have gone till the last second did this it wouldn't have been such a big payoff for us because he would have still declined. We would have drew it out till the end if the plan was to pick it up. Now we can focus on the future" But what does the future hold for a player with two years left in his VHL career? Rumors are swirling that no team will even offer him a contract. Which most would think would piss him and his agent off but Robbie has a answer to that question also "If no one wants to sign him thats fine with us. We will make the most of it and make it a huge joke. It will be fun. So if you plan to not sign him, he will still practice as a joke and joke about the whole situation. If you think it will get rid of him, you are sadly mistaken. It actually will make things worse. So I dare you to not offer him any contracts. I actually hope you don't, it will be far more entertaining" 

Till today I did not care about this. But today was black friday for productions. All productions, other then some Netflix shows have taken a 2 week precautionary break. So this has unleashed me on the public that I avoid because most are dumb. I went to a plaza today just for milk. I walked in the store, walked right back out because of the insane panic buyers. Fucking morons. Buying toilet paper because yep that will save you. Hope you fucking choke on it morons, not getting in these lines just for milk for my kids. I'll go to Metro later and get it. Fucking pathetic public reaction if you ask me. Makes me wonder how we'd all react to something that we should really be worried about. This Virus is nothing. It's not the end of times. Wow a few thousand have died. but 70,000 have recovered. This is nothing. But people are legit fighting over toilet paper. They can have it. Choke and die you fucking scum. 

Till today I did not care about this. But today was black friday for productions. All productions, other then some Netflix shows have taken a 2 week precautionary break. So this has unleashed me on the public that I avoid because most are dumb. I went to a plaza today just for milk. I walked in the store, walked right back out because of the insane panic buyers. Fucking morons. Buying toilet paper because yep that will save you. Hope you fucking choke on it morons, not getting in these lines just for milk for my kids. I'll go to Metro later and get it. Fucking pathetic public reaction if you ask me. Makes me wonder how we'd all react to something that we should really be worried about. This Virus is nothing. It's not the end of times. Wow a few thousand have died. but 70,000 have recovered. This is nothing. But people are legit fighting over toilet paper. They can have it. Choke and die you fucking scum. 

Till today I did not care about this. But today was black friday for productions. All productions, other then some Netflix shows have taken a 2 week precautionary break. So this has unleashed me on the public that I avoid because most are dumb. I went to a plaza today just for milk. I walked in the store, walked right back out because of the insane panic buyers. Fucking morons. Buying toilet paper because yep that will save you. Hope you fucking choke on it morons, not getting in these lines just for milk for my kids. I'll go to Metro later and get it. Fucking pathetic public reaction if you ask me. Makes me wonder how we'd all react to something that we should really be worried about. This Virus is nothing. It's not the end of times. Wow a few thousand have died. but 70,000 have recovered. This is nothing. But people are legit fighting over toilet paper. They can have it. Choke and die you fucking scum. 

Till today I did not care about this. But today was black friday for productions. All productions, other then some Netflix shows have taken a 2 week precautionary break. So this has unleashed me on the public that I avoid because most are dumb. I went to a plaza today just for milk. I walked in the store, walked right back out because of the insane panic buyers. Fucking morons. Buying toilet paper because yep that will save you. Hope you fucking choke on it morons, not getting in these lines just for milk for my kids. I'll go to Metro later and get it. Fucking pathetic public reaction if you ask me. Makes me wonder how we'd all react to something that we should really be worried about. This Virus is nothing. It's not the end of times. Wow a few thousand have died. but 70,000 have recovered. This is nothing. But people are legit fighting over toilet paper. They can have it. Choke and die you fucking scum. 

Till today I did not care about this. But today was black friday for productions. All productions, other then some Netflix shows have taken a 2 week precautionary break. So this has unleashed me on the public that I avoid because most are dumb. I went to a plaza today just for milk. I walked in the store, walked right back out because of the insane panic buyers. Fucking morons. Buying toilet paper because yep that will save you. Hope you fucking choke on it morons, not getting in these lines just for milk for my kids. I'll go to Metro later and get it. Fucking pathetic public reaction if you ask me. Makes me wonder how we'd all react to something that we should really be worried about. This Virus is nothing. It's not the end of times. Wow a few thousand have died. but 70,000 have recovered. This is nothing. But people are legit fighting over toilet paper. They can have it. Choke and die you fucking scum. 

Till today I did not care about this. But today was black friday for productions. All productions, other then some Netflix shows have taken a 2 week precautionary break. So this has unleashed me on the public that I avoid because most are dumb. I went to a plaza today just for milk. I walked in the store, walked right back out because of the insane panic buyers. Fucking morons. Buying toilet paper because yep that will save you. Hope you fucking choke on it morons, not getting in these lines just for milk for my kids. I'll go to Metro later and get it. Fucking pathetic public reaction if you ask me. Makes me wonder how we'd all react to something that we should really be worried about. This Virus is nothing. It's not the end of times. Wow a few thousand have died. but 70,000 have recovered. This is nothing. But people are legit fighting over toilet paper. They can have it. Choke and die you fucking scum. 

Till today I did not care about this. But today was black friday for productions. All productions, other then some Netflix shows have taken a 2 week precautionary break. So this has unleashed me on the public that I avoid because most are dumb. I went to a plaza today just for milk. I walked in the store, walked right back out because of the insane panic buyers. Fucking morons. Buying toilet paper because yep that will save you. Hope you fucking choke on it morons, not getting in these lines just for milk for my kids. I'll go to Metro later and get it. Fucking pathetic public reaction if you ask me. Makes me wonder how we'd all react to something that we should really be worried about. This Virus is nothing. It's not the end of times. Wow a few thousand have died. but 70,000 have recovered. This is nothing. But people are legit fighting over toilet paper. They can have it. Choke and die you fucking scum.