Normally this would just go to the ban thread but given the circumstances I think it's best that everyone know what's going on.
It has unfortunately come to the attention of myself and @Acydburn that @Josh has been embezzling league funds for his own purposes. Via his access to the league PayPal he was stripping donation funds as payments for portal, forum, and domain hosting with amounts far higher than were actually needed. Because the line items were things he was paying for we had no reason, for a number of years, to think anything of it and were unaware that the costs were actually far less than what he was reimbursing himself which amounts to potentially thousands of dollars; we're still working out the total figures.
Obviously we are completely shocked at this behaviour and have immediately stripped Josh of his role as commissioner pending potential future legal action. We have always held firm that the league funds are used exclusively on league related activities so I am quite frankly pissed that a member of the blue team would take donation money for their own uses; whatever his excuses may be. Please be aware that we will be launching a further investigation and audit of all our costs and funds to be sure that no one else has done anything of the sort in the past.
Sincerely,
@Commissioner
Edit: In case any future people see the is and don’t see the date; it was purely an April Fool’s joke, Josh was in on it (in fact it was his idea) and the donation money is not only safe but audited.
Hearing Jerome Midson @MexicanCow123 is being shopped around the VHL's eastern conference. This is following the Wranglers have been struggling with paying the expensive salary for a below average goalie, seeing a massive drop off from their "award winning" season. Malmo Nighthawks are rumoured to the be the most interested team, as the retoolers look to return to the glory they achieved last season. The trade that makes the most sense is Midson and Thor Odinson heading to Malmo in exchange for Ash Sparks and Yaroslav Bogatyrev.
Also hearing former #BRAT Kimi Raikkonen will be on the move from the Riga Reign, with the Moscow Menance being a party to keep an eye on. The rebuilding Reign are rumoured to be looking to drop some of the forwards they've drafted and developed, and the Menance are looking for a strong discount forward to help round out the future of the organization. Not sure on the return, as Riga is hesitant to move on from the dynamic forward this early in their career. Looking for a first and a sweetener, such as prospect Olumide Anderson or Petit Hughie.
@VHLE GM GMs are required to submit lines using the Team Management section of the portal. If you have manual requests due to roster changes please PM me your notes. Please look over your rosters carefully to make sure everyone is present that should be, no one is present that shouldn't be, and everyone's position is correct. If you see any issues please notify me ASAP so it can be corrected for the first sim.
Theme week is upon us and that means my player, Logan Ninefingers gets some much-needed TPE before the jump to the show. I wanted to talk about the All-Stars that populated the league when my first gen player, Brian Payne joined the league. It was at a time when Payne was in his rookie season, and I watched the vets with super high TPE light up the box scores night in and night out. So for this theme I thought I’d try to make the perfect all-star team for S83.
CENTER:
At the center position there were some beauties lighting up the league. I am not sure if this was the meta change or not but there were some huge numbers being put up.
My first pick at center for this season would be Calgary’s Saku Kotkakoivu @DollarAndADream. He had 59g 63a= 122points leading the league and was point leader. In later seasons his production dipped a bit but still was a beast scoring 678 points in 574 games.
Pick two would have to go to Paul Atreidas @Mr_Hatter from Toronto. 61goals 59assists= 120 points. The first overall pick in S77. While small he was never short on numbers. He loved to shoot the puck and amassed an amazing 3600 shots in his career. In S83 he helped lead Moscow to a dominant season
Right Wing:
The pick for right wing was equally hard but would have to go with Alex Johnston @Alexfrom Riga. Alongside fellow right wing Anze Miklavz he scored 58g 55a=113. Big and gritty AJ could hit, pass, and score so while the league was stacked with great wingers, I had to go with him.
Honorable mentions at RW:
Duncan Idaho @OrbitingDeath
Vasile Lamb @dlamb
Anze Miklavz @ke1vi
Left Wing:
For left wing I had to go with the #2 overall pick int eh S77 draft, Reylynn Reinhart @Ricer13. RR’s point totals really jumped In the latter part of the career. A 56 goal scorer in S82, in S83 RR scored 45g 54a for 99 pts. RR could hit too and had size to score those ugly goals. An easy pick for S83 all-star.
Defense:
Ok now for my favorite position and there are some serious legends that played that season to include two that scored over 30 goals and weren’t even the point leaders.
While I think that the top ten-point leaders on defense could easily be on this list I picked Jerome Reinhart @MexicanCow123. He scored a crazy 35goals and 69 assists (104). Now he was a minus 15 that season on a New York team that didn’t make the playoffs. I think this makes this pick for an all-star in that even on a struggling club he put up some amazing numbers.
To pair with JR I picked Riga’s monster Dman, Battre Sandstrom @Acydburn. The Sterling Labatte Trophy winner that seasons he scored 28 goals 76 assists for 104 points. 17 of his 28 goals came on the power play and he added 256 hits and 129 blocked shots showing just why he won the trophy for best defenseman.
Honorable mention:
Aurelien Moreau (TOR) @Frank Point leader that season.
Hard Markinson (MOS) @STZ
Tom Eagles (LDN) @Greg_Di
Hari Singh Nalwa (WAR) @Dil
Bo Johansson (Rookie) @Shindigs
Goalie:
Again, some great goalies to pick from by was easily Xavier Booberry @CowboyinAmerica. XB went OFF this season with 40 wins 18 losses with a league leading 1.92 GAA and 10 shutouts! Yes, 10! In S83 he won the Brett Slobodzian, Aidan Shaw Trophy, and Greg Clegane Trophy.
Honorable Mentions:
Tobias Reinhart @Spaz
Em Em Flex @oilmandan
Oskar Lindbergh @Doomsday
Brandt Fuhr @Tate
To start us off, we'd have to find a place to hold this years all-star game, and what better place than to hold it in Los Angeles! The Stars currently hold the best record in the league, at 29-7-2, making them the host for the upcoming all-star game. I feel like if there were to be an event, the top seeded team in the entire league would always host the event, so this year it would be the stars. If there were a tiebreaker between the top seeded teams at the time decided for the location, you could just go based off of the usual tiebreaker rules to figure out who would be the host.
Format
Now, to get into the format. We would basically have the NA Conference vs the EU Conference, as that's the easiest way to divide up the teams in my eyes. Each roster would have 6 forwards, 4 defenseman, and 2 goalies. You would end up playing two games, one with each goalie so that the goalies both get to play in a game. The way rosters would be decided is each team sends a single player at 1st, which would then be 8 skaters for each conference. That would then leave 4 extra players for each conference, where I believe the top 2 seeded teams in each conference should get a 2nd player. This would then make it so each roster now has 10 players out of the required 12, so in this instance, the Los Angeles Stars and Calgary Wranglers get two players instead of one, same with the Malmo Nighthawks and Moscow Menace. The remaining 2 players for each conference would be decided on a fan vote, where the fans would elect who they would want to send to the all-star game. Again, it would cap out at 6 forwards, 4 defenseman, and 2 goalies, so you couldn't send for example 3 goalies or 7 forwards to make the roster ineligible. I feel like this is a great way to reward the top teams, as they get to send another player, while on top of that the community gets to feel involved as they get to send their favorite player potentially to the all-star game.
Selections
Now the best part, the selections. I will actually try my best to come up with some sort of mock all-star game rosters, but again, at this point, some teams have 39 games played while others have 40. For the fan vote, I'll just throw in whoever I would end up voting for. Without further adieu, lets get underway:
NA Conference All-Star Selections
C - Todd Cooke - 28G 25A 53P +22 - 39GP - @KRZY
Todd Cooke is having an impressive season, having easily over a point-per-game for the best team in the league. A superstar centerman for Los Angeles and a big part of why they're winning, it would be an obvious choice to send Cooke to the all-star game. They are 5th in points and 2nd in goals, a great shooter than can leave the fans stunned, it would be a fantastic addition to Team NA.
LW - Larry Abass Jr - 12G 32A 44P +26 - 39GP - @RileyL
The second player I decided to go with is Larry Abass Jr. They are currently second on their team in points only behind Todd Cooke and seem to the playmaker for Todd Cooke. They have 32 assists and the best +/- on the team, with an impressive 124 hits. Abass Jr seems to be a physical playmaker that goes into the corners to help dig the puck out, to only then find Cooke for the finish. A great all around addition for Team NA at the end of the day.
Merome Dilson is one of the top goaltenders in the entire league, not just NA. They've helped turn Calgary around, as last season was not the best season for Calgary fans. An impressive goaltender who is having a career high and doesn't seem to be stopping would be a huge addition between the pipes for Team NA.
As both Calgary and Los Angeles get a second player, adding a solid defenseman in Skor McFleury is a no brainer. They currently are almost a point-per-game for Calgary and are 7th in scoring this season. An impressive skater with an accurate shot and just an all-around complete player will help solidify the blue line for Team NA.
C - The Frenchman - 16G 40A 56P +12 - 39GP - @OrbitingDeath
The Frenchman is almost a perfect no-brainer. They're an elite playmaker who can set up any goal scorer in the league, with the most assists in the league. They would fit perfectly with Todd Cooke, who can fire the puck from almost anywhere and find a way to score. A dynamic duo would get huge for Team NA and these two might just be it.
The second goalie on this list is Rory's player. WWWWWWW has had an absolute crazy season, where he's single handedly helping the New York Americans get to a playoff spot. This guy is literally like prime Hasek, trying to carry his team to the playoffs, and he easily deserves a spot on Team NA.
D - Bobby Bob - 7G 27A 34P -1 - 40GP - @Baby Boomer
This is when things are going to get a little hard to decide players, but I decided with Bobby Bob. Toronto has been struggling this season, and it's either between Jimi Jaks or Bobby Bob to make the team, but I went with Bobby Bob. Currently, the team already has two good centers, and they need another defenseman to help round out the first pairing, so I decided to go with Bobby Bob. He is quietly having a good season with Jimi Jaks, where they're really the only players getting anything done on the team at the moment.
Just like WWWWWWW, this one is a no brainer. Trunov has been having an exceptional season for the Phoenix, finding himself tied for 2nd in points, only behind AK92 Wit Da Hoodie. He is an elite player all around and having him apart of the roster would be huge for Team NA. It seems that every season Chicago has one player that just decides to have an MVP-like season, and Trunov was the player this year.
D - Liv Slater - 18G 22A 40P -22 - 39GP - @Subject056
Our third defenseman on our list, I believe Slater would be the choice for Vancouver. Slater is over a point-per-game on a rebuilding Vancouver roster that is struggling this season, but was expected. Despite the -22, they're a young defenseman who can be very solid on that second pairing, including 116 hits and 111 shot blocks. They might be able to bring that grit and physicality to Team NA for the all-star game.
Our last player to make the team before the "fan vote" would commence would be Severus Targaryen. There really isn't much to say about Seattle, as they're going through a rebuild, but it's fairly obvious that Targaryen is their best player, and is carrying them. The youngest player to this point added to the roster and they would get some great experience playing with and against the best players in the league. A potential future all-star in the making. Targaryen would be a great add for Team NAs forward depth.
Team NA "fan vote" extras
Normally, this is where the fans would vote for players, but for reasons, obviously the fans aren't "voting" here, so I'll be filling out the roster with who I think deserves the remaining spots.
D - Mark Calaway - 14G 29A 43P +17 - 39GP - @Beketov
The first player to get in would be Mark Calaway in my eyes. On multiple other teams, he would easily be the first choice, however, the Frenchman is currently overshadowing him and his fantastic season. Regardless, Calaway is one of the best defenseman in NA and is having a career year. It seems D.C. finally has a dynamic duo in Calaway and the Frenchman going this season, and they could finally be a contender for the playoffs. A great addition to help round out the D core and an easy choice.
C - Jimi Jaks - 18G 24A 42P +10 - 40GP - @ke1vi
A potential questionable addition in the last spot over the likes of Vincent Laroche-Gagnier, who is having a much better season. However, I'm going for Jimi Jaks as he's having an exceptional season on a team that is struggling all over the place. Not only is he a +10 on a team that is below .500, he is over a point per game, where the rest of his team is struggling to meet that mark. I feel like on a better team, Jimi Jaks would have much better stats, but I decided to slide him in as the last forward for Team NA.
EU Conference All-Star Selections
D - Jacob Stone - 14G 32A 46P +7 - 40GP - @scoop
The first selection for the EU Team would be Jacob Stone. An obvious selection from Malmo, as they've been the best defenseman in the league up to this point, and a huge part of Malmo's success this season. Malmo's D core is exceptional this season and easily the best in the league, where his partner Reese McFleury might be joining him on this list as well. A great defenseman with passing ability and an all-around complete game would be a huge addition for Team EU as they'll look to have a strong first pairing.
Another obvious addition as we'll just be taking the first pairing from Malmo to be a pairing on Team EU. Just like Jacob Stone, they're basically an exact carbon copy of Stone, just slightly worse. However, that doesn't mean he isn't capable of being one of the best defenseman in the league, including his +22, which is very good for a defenseman at this point in the season. The D lineup for Team EU is already looking very strong and having two players that have played together on a team is great chemistry wise.
C - Axle Gunner - 18G 30A 48P -3 - 40GP - @Steve
For Moscow, we'll be sending a pair of forwards to join Team EU, with Axle Gunner being the first one. Gunner is the playmaker for Moscow, having 30 assists on the season and having over a point-per-game. Moscow has heavily overperformed this season, as not many people imagined them doing this well, but there's no complaints coming from Moscow, that's for sure. Gunner will be a fantastic addition as a young centerman who just like Targaryen, can gain some extra experience from the all-star game.
As for the second player coming from Moscow, we'll be going with his partner, Left Alone. Left Alone seems to be the goal scorer for this team, as they lead the team in goals with 23 on the season. They also can pass the puck, with 25 assists, so they seem to be able to do it all. The only thing they really lack is physicality, but they have great discipline, only taking a single penalty on the season. Another duo that will be joining Team EU as their chemistry is already looking better than Team NA.
Leonard Triller is an easy addition to the forward core, as they are currently 4th in the league in points, with great stats all around. London quietly has been a very good team this season, and Triller is a big part of it with the season they are having. Just an all-around complete player will be joining Team EU and they are looking deadly across the board so far.
Dixon is currently on pace for another great season, trying to follow up his career high last season of 93 points. Regardless, Dixon is the heart of the Helsinki offense, where they seem to be involved in everything offensively. The next closest forward on the team in points is Grimgor Ironhide with 39, as he already has a 11 point lead on his forward group. Regardless, Dixon is a great add to Team EU as they look to stack their team even more.
C - John Jameson - 20G 31A 51P +19 - 40GP - @Frank
The more and more we go down the list, the more and more you realize that EU is stacked with talent. Jameson is an amazing forward who like the rest on this list, are just a complete player showing no holes. All these players unlike with Team NA can fit into any scenario and thrive, which I feel like is very important for an all-star game event. The only downside for Jameson could be the fact that he somehow has 144 penalty minutes, so this guy is going to go out there and probably drop the gloves at the event.
A current front runner for multiple awards is AK92 Wit da Hoodie, Team EUs best player. Riga this season has been alright, but they probably would've liked to have a better season, but regardless, AK92 is steamrolling the competition. Only 39 games in, he's 10 points away from being a point-per-game, and also has a 6 point lead on the 2nd place in points. An obvious add and someone who is head and shoulders above everyone else will be a difficult task for Team NA to handle.
D - Rex Wolffe Gregor - 13G 23A 36P -14 - 40GP - @oilmandan
Maybe not the most ideal defenseman on the list, but a defenseman who is just below a point-per-game is still a solid add for Team EU. They currently have a strong first pairing who can play top minutes, so a bit of a weaker D core isn't the end of the world, especially since their forward core is stacked. Gregor has been having a decent season for Warsaw who has struggled offensively, being second on the team in points as a defenseman. Nevertheless, a solid add for Team EU on the backend.
D - David Jokinen - 15G 24A 39P -14 - 40GP - @Ahma
There's really not much to say for Davos, as they are tanking for first overall to most likely pick @CowboyinAmerica. Jokinen has been having a great season on a team that sucks, so they for sure deserve a spot in the all-star game.
Team EU "fan vote" extras
G - Matt Murdock - 15-14-3 .935 2.17, 2 shutouts - 32GP - @Acydburn
The first goaltender on this list, we'll be going with Matt Murdock. Murdock has been having a great season for Prague, dropping a .935 and a 2.17, impressive numbers for a goaltender. They are looking to have a career high this season currently, as their highest sv% in previous years was a .931 in S87 with Moscow. A great add for Team EU as they'll need solid goaltending.
Another very solid goaltender and the second on the list is Fuuka Rask. Just like Murdock, Rask has been having a great season and is looking to have a career year, where his previous best was a .925 sv% last season with Helsinki. Both these goalies are having career years and it would make sense to have them on the team to help backstop the crease for Team EU.
Final Rosters:
Team North America:
C - Todd Cooke
LW - Larry Abass Jr
C - The Frenchman
RW - Yaroslav Trunov
C - Severus Targaryen
C - Jimi Jaks
D - Skor McFleury
D - Bobby Bob
D - Liv Slater
D - Mark Calaway
G - Merome Dilson
G - WWWWWWW
Team Europe:
C - Axle Gunner
LW - Left Alone
RW - Leonard Triller
C - Daryl Dixon
C - John Jameson
LW - AK92 Wit da Hoodie
D - Jacob Stone
D - Reese McFleury
D - Rex Wolffe Gregor
D - David Jokinen
G - Matt Murdock
G - Fuuka Rask
Conclusion
Well that rounds up the article! This took a while to make, but pretty happy with the result and the theme week as it's always fun to write a huge article. Do you guys like the format for choosing the teams? Who would you vote in if you had the choice for EU or NA as the final two? Regardless, was a bunch of fun to write and had a blast doing so.
Dearest VHL nation, if you are like me, an average purveyor of the internet, you may have come across creatures known as "Vancouver Canucks fans". These absolute cretins come out of every orifice from the depths of hell every 15 years or so. From the online discourse, me, and and many others, have come to the conclusion that Vancouver Canucks fans do NOT know ball. Especially following the discussion after Vancouver Canucks defender Tyler Myers threw a wild elbow to injure an opponent last night, their baffling lack of hockey knowledge has always been a major sticking point in my head. With their very foolish hockey opinions backed up by cherry picked Jfresh and Dom lzuxckeusdms "player cards" that focus on irrelavant advanced stats like rWAR% (seriously what the fuck. this is a baseball stat. if you think WAR is relevant in anything other then baseball you are criminally insane), Canucks fans have created an echo chamber where bad opinions beget bad opinions, tricking their entire fanbase into the delusion.
My hypothesis is that Canucks fans lack of hockey knowledge emanates from their lack of hockey skills. Everybody knows that hockey is a very intricate sport with a wide array of abilities used to succeed. In my opinion, the very base level skill in hockey is SKATING. So I posed the Canucks fans of the VHL a simple question: "do u know how to skate". The answers will SHOCK you!
Based on these findings, the average Canuck fan does NOT know how to skate. If we dive deeper into the numbers, however, a trend starts to emerge. Of the Canucks fans that self report their ability to skate, ZERO of them are natives to Vancouver's natural fan area. Beaver is famously a product of Sherwood Park, Alberta. Perhaps this is where he learned how to skate, during his time in OIL COUNTRY. Ricer, I believe, also has roots in Alberta. version 2 is from Newfoundland and/or Labrador. In fact, the Canucks were so afraid of having a bad performance in front of him they cancelled their game when he was in town! Lol!
In the sake of fairness, I also contacted some fans of the Edmonton Oilers, a good sporting fan base with no flaws whatsoever. This is my control group, so we can compare people of the same general demographic (i.e. nerds that are on VHLforum.com):
If we consider this unbiased, scientific information, we can come to the conclusion that Canucks fans DO NOT know how to skate, and DO NOT know ball. Please ignore any opinion that you may hear from a B.C. based Canucks fan, and allow them to continue living in their delusion. Thank you for reading.
This is the magical wheel. This is NOT the results. Just to show you!
$1/1 ticket entry for @Acydburn
$1/1 ticket entry for @MexicanCow123
$1/1 ticket entry for @Alex
$1/1 ticket entry for @a_Ferk
$1/1 ticket entry for @wcats
$1/1 ticket entry for @JartY
$1/1 ticket entry for @leafsman
$1/1 ticket entry for @der meister
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$1/1 ticket entry for @Kisslinger
$1/1 ticket entry for @Berocka
$1/1 ticket entry for @Moon
$1/1 ticket entry for @Esso2264
$1/1 ticket entry for @v.2
$1/1 ticket entry for @qripll
$1/1 ticket entry for @Smarch
$1/1 ticket entry for @Lefty_S
$10/10 ticket entry for @Ricer13
$5/5 ticket entry for @jacobcarson877
1 HOUR - 7PM MTN I will click da button, put results under this. GL!
User @Benson has received a 1 week TPE ban (01/14/2024 to 01/21/2024) for violation of the VHL Code of Conduct section 1.2 in regards to the usage of AI in point tasks.
I feel yeah brother. I had to take a big step back from GMing soley because of this. Keep your head up, it's not easy when you're always being criticized, you got this, keep up the amazing work and don't let them get into your head like they did to me.
I feel yeah brother. I had to take a big step back from GMing soley because of this. Keep your head up, it's not easy when you're always being criticized, you got this, keep up the amazing work and don't let them get into your head like they did to me.
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