Thunder

1. What do you think about Vancouver being bounced from the playoffs by Chicago? I think it sucks and Simon sucks and we should be in the finals. 2. Finals are set and are you surprised by who made the finals? Yes…. I didnt expect Vancouver to not be in the finals 3. Do you think changes are coming to the Vancouver roster this off season? Explain…. I have no clue. I’m sure Frank will do what needs to be done and Vancouver will be on top next season. 4. Do you golf during the off season or what other active do you take part in during the off season? Bollos gets shit faced with Riley Martin and they tag Vancouver walls with “Rip Wheeler” emoji. 5. NHL season is starting soon so what are you most excited about for this coming NHL season? I get to watch the Bruins. 6. Riddle: I am always in front of you, but you can’t see me. What am I? Hmmmm. My dick?

When the VHL and the NHL clash, it adds to the spirit of hockey. Everything falls into place. The weather changes, there is more time spent in front of an IPad or television, (for me that is) and center ice activates. And with the Vancouver Wolves being eliminated by a cheating Simon, I can live vicariously through Riga because the Frank Troll gave us access to their LR. While Riga starts their cup dominance, I’m still jonesing for some hockey. I’m not interested in old games so if you’re thinking the NHL channel could fix my addiction, it won’t. I havent updated my video game since NHL 22, and don’t plan on getting a new version until things change. Gone are the days of building the player with slots. It was an expense but it was well worth it for me!! That leaves me to pre-season. The next game is Tuesday and I set the DVR to record. I really hope it works, otherwise I’m going to have to turn on Apple TV and watch The Goon. At least there is the good news that its officially the early signs of hockey weather. 195 words

1. WE SWEPT MOSCOW! How did you feel once that series concluded?! Pretty shitty since I picked Moscow to win it all, its costing me TPE, and thank you for letting me crash your press conference. Appreciate it. 2. Do you believe in the Victory Cup curse? Absolutely. Its a curse true and blue and the only thing Davos has in its favor this season is that it missed the curse. 3. Has Davos exceeded your expectations this season now that we face Riga? Yes and no…. I thought Davos was in a rebuilding season but at the same time, Alex is a genius at GM so nothing surprises me with success of Davos. But, Davos is about to lose to Riga so it was good while it lasted for Davos. 4. Who would you say is the Davos team MVP this playoffs so far? David Jokinen. Do I need to say why? OK, I will…. @Ahma bleeds Davos purple so there is no one else who is as dedicated to Davos than Ahma. I mean, if you listened to the latest podcast you would know its a waste of time for any other team to even look at Ahma’s players. 5. Which team do you believe is Davos’ biggest rival overall? OH, it has to be Vancouver Wolves. This rivalry has been created by me and its in my head only. Every team is a rivalry to me. 6. Thoughts on the end of the VHLE? Nothing in particular. I kind of liked the prep to get into the big leagues.. could have even bumped it up another 100 tpe and keep more players in the league. I dont know exactly how things work so it’s nothing I really concern myself about though. 7. Will you be participating in the Pro Am this offseason? Sure, if I’m smart enough to sign up. 8. Is there anything about the VHL that still confuses you or that you have questions about? First of all, who’s gonna answer my questions? Yeah, there are things that confuse me but nothing I cant overcome.

Riga and HC Davos are in a serious battle for the European Conference finals. By the time this is in print, the series could likely be over, but it still needs to be said. The Riga GM, @Lemorse7, does not play fair. Now, you may ask what the hell are you talking about, and I have to explain. Lemorse7 has been trolling the Vancouver Wolves GM all season and most recently played some serious mind games against Frank and other Wolves team members. The Riga Troll(Lemorse7) messed with Logan Ninefingers so badly that Ninefingers didn’t get a point the entire playoffs against Chicago. The Riga Troll shook up PMB so much that he wasn’t able to beat up Legacy Gaming and Guntis Gavilrovs had to put in some extra effort to get revenge on Legacy Gaming in the next game, only to become injured and not play the remaining games at 100%. The Riga Troll was so menacing that Rip Wheeler gave up drinking, which caused an economic depression for the local liquor stores. Bollos de Trueno, was useless in the play offs, which was not much different during the season either. The biggest issue; however, was how The Riga Troll dedicated so much time f-ing with Soju. Considering all the damage The Riga Troll did to the success of the Wolves this season, I thought it would only be fair for Lemorse7 to give a few Wolves access to the Riga locker room so that there could be some reciprocal trolling. What better opportunity could there be for Riga to get a little taste of friendly participation by superstars like PMB, or Riley Martin, or even Owen Lazaro. The extra attention given to Riga could likely help the team to kick the shit out of HC Davos and then move into the championships. I’m pretty sure that every member of Riga, with the exception of Alex, would take whatever they can get, because Riga will not be able to complete the job without help from the Wolves locker room. Logan Ninefingers can speak to the other world and has the ability to disrupt SIMON and change the outcomes to Riga’s favor. All Lemorse7 needs to do is invite us to troll the Riga locker room. The Riga Troll will soon learn the power afforded to Ninefingers and he will see this at the next game when Red Panda with the results. Should Riga Troll play it smart and afford the Wolves to troll, its quite likely that Red Panda’s unique game is a positive outcome, but should the Riga Troll choose to prevent this union, then be prepared to cry. Perhaps The Riga Troll should get some advice from people like Lucyxpher, who as a VHLM GM, recognizes the benefits of open arms and encouraging a mutual involvement, or someone like Axle Gunner, who is a legend and future hall of famer who would certainly like a Continental Cup or two. Or… you could seek advice from Skor McFleury, who is going to retire once Riga is eliminated, and only The Riga Troll could prolong McFleury’s career by making the right decision. Time is running out for The Riga Troll, but it doesn’t matter to me as I’m getting TPE regardless!! ALERT!!!!! This was completed prior to The Riga GM allowing the Wolves to troll the Riga LR. Due to The Riga GM making such allowance, Riga spanked HC Davos and now leads the series 3–2. Riga is on their way to the Cup. Congratulations… 590 words

Goodbye Villain. The Villain was the best shit I ever heard…. Could have gone on for a long time with that character. Genius!!

Well sort of you did…. Comparing to frostbeard’s birthday and how youre older by a few months…. So i guess you’re right. And at least you got the joke, since i fell for getting free tpe. Never gonna let it go !!!! And…. I can only say that i pictured you as an old man because of your profile pic. Dont know why others think youre old! You’re still young!! Have great day Victor

It’d be a hell of a lot better if @Tate got the Villain to involve Scottyp and scurvy. This thing could grow legs!!!

Only 2 1/2 hours. Couldn’t come up with anything else? I didnt hear a thing about Victor’s birthday!!!

Sounds like The Villain has seeded himself into your brain and is preventing you from exposing the devious things Villain has in mind and he’s keeping you from recording him and presenting his twisted mind to the vhl. If youre gonna quit leagues, quit all the other shit you have and get back on track with villain podcasts. I’m running out of shit to write about and i need stuff to keep maxing tpe. Step up!!!!

Just dont do it this season please!!

None with Thunder!!!

Whatever!!!!

1. How would you describe Davos’ performance in the wildcard round against Warsaw in one word? Good - but I have to say more than one word because I’m crashing the press conference for the tpe and if I dont write enough it will not count for tpe. 2. Moscow is up next! How do you feel about our squad going into this series? If you are answering after the series is over, how did we do? I think Moscow will completely crush Davos, unfortunately for Davos and for David Jokinen because I really like him. 3. What are your thoughts on the current state of goalies in the VHL after the STHS tweak from a few seasons ago to create more scoring chances for skaters? I haven’t really paid attention to that to know if it has made a difference. If it is for the betterment of the VHL, then I think its a good thing. 4. If you could play with any other player in the VHL, active or retired, who would it be? I’m not sure who that would be. I’d say it would have been nice if my player was on the same team as Brian Payne back when he was playing because he was legendary and it would have been fun to be on the same line. 5. What was your player’s most impressive stat this regular season? The most impressive stat for Bollos de Trueno would be how he screwed up so much this season and cost Vancouver most of the losses. Trueno was shit this season. A big pussy who didn’t fight, didnt hit, and barely blocked shots. 6. Does your player have any pregame rituals or superstitions? Yeah, he cant give Simon any shit before the season starts again becuase it cost Vancouver the first 5 losses of the season. 7.What is the first song that comes up when you shuffle your playlist? I have several playlists but the latest shuffle came up with La Reina del Sur 8. Do you speak more than one language? If so, what are they? I’ve sputtered in spanish for several years but over the past couple years my ability has expanded exponentially. I speak it every chance I get now.

If there is an easy thing to say about the VHL general managers, it would be, “they know their shit.” And I dont even know all of them and their pedigree. The ones I know, I can safely say that they match the statement about their abilities. Starting with Spartan, he’s got Moscow running the league and has been for multiple seasons. It doesn’t matter where Moscow places in the standings, they are a playoff team. The only thing that will keep Moscow down this season is the “VHL Curse.” And Cole, better known as badcolethetitan, well he’s been so impressive taking Chicago up a notch ever since he took over and unfortunately for him, Chicago faces Vancouver in the playoffs this round. I remember calling Alex a genius in the past, and that hasn’t changed. He has got a lot of talent knowing what to do with players, and who to pick up to make HC Davos better. He’s a very patient GM who is always respected by opponents. I’m not sure how far Davos will go; however, because although David Jokinen is a threat for the team, its well known that he’s somewhat skiddish about playing against Vancouver, should Davos make the finals. There is one general manager that sticks out above the rest. Frank, is a notch above and is unmatched when it comes to running a team. His eye for success comes out when needed most. Taking Vancouver from the bowels of the division after losing the first five games, thanks to Bollos de Trueno, to home ice, Frank had no fear whatsoever that the Wolves would be a dominating force. Perhaps he was leading other teams into a sense of confidence when they played Vancouver, or he had other things in mind, his adjustments to the team and lineup has given the Vancouver Wolves the best chance to get a cup. It is because of his decision making and his dedication to the team that Frank should easily be awarded the David Knight trophy. 341 words

There is no doubt that will be plenty of discussion about the VHLE going away, and of course, since it is the hot topic, I might as well have a discussion with this as well. However, I am going to be on topic of what really happened to the VHL, and I think you might be surprised of the results of the investigation, even though I am not all that surprised. I saw this coming and there is someone sitting in a deep dark cave right now laughing in a slow hoarse voice. The process of the investigation started weeks ago when I first learned about a conspiracy involving a twisted, dangerous, person, who hides in a dark web of mischief and deviousness. This was revealed in an inconspicuous podcast blending in with other point tasks and would have been overlooked by me, had I not taken a break from hanging out with @Smarch, as his wingman, helping him find hookers. The podcast involved a mastermind who had just created his best work yet and he could not keep the news to himself any longer as he proudly discussed the invention with a side kick, who at the time appeared to be nothing but a misunderstood squeaky little creature who goes by Pinky. Typical to this monster’s inventions, the boasting and antagonizing began. The Villain exposed himself in this early podcast and @Tate warned us of what might be coming. I have to be honest though, I did not expect The Villain to ruin the VHLE. I thought that The Villain would be doing some manipulation with his new invention of a player who would mischievously overcome all limitations of the STHS and Simon and every team would be envious of the Mad Villain, who would capture all awards from now until the end of his lustrous career. As the weeks progressed and The Villain used deception and magical wizardry, to invade the Vancouver locker room and steal the mascot, The Villain could not help himself but announce this in additional podcasts. But, behind the podcasts, The Villain was obviously at work implementing a process to of putting the VHLE behind us. He clearly used his dark powers to sway all minds and decisions to be in order to force the board of governors to make the decision to dismantle the VHLE. It could be my fault that The Villain went underground and did not provide any clues about his true intentions, after I exposed his motives of kidnapping the Wolves mascot, and for that I must apologize. It seems that as soon as The Villain realized that if he announced his intentions, I would intercept him every step of the way; as an example when I discovered he was making a super stick for Manny Ceson. I should have known The Villain was into something deeper and darker. It came about too easily and now that the VHLE is officially over, Manny Ceson and Mad Villain will remain in Las Vegas for the foreseeable future and harass the other VHLM teams. Now that The Villain has destroyed the VHLE, I challenge him to announce his next mission and all future missions to give me a chance to stop him in his steps. Does The Villain have any more podcasts in him? 554 words

I’d be happy to do it but I dont think Margot will want to leave my side.

Girts, you gave Bollos too much credit especially since Calaway carried me most of the season until Frank switched the lines. I had to look up who de Trueno is dating because I couldnt tell you what she looks like. But…. I think Bollos can handle dating Margot. Definitely a step up from Rip Wheeler tagging Mama June and we all know Logan Ninefingers has the hots for Ferro.

Its your lie, you better stick to it!!!! Otherwise you’ll be packing your shit and moving in with @Daniel Janser

1. What are your expectations for the Wildcard round between Seattle Bears & Calgary Wranglers? How many games and who wins? Seattle in 5 2. Will you follow the European Conference Wildcard games? Why or why not? Is there a European conference? 3. What are your expectations for the series between HC Davos & Warsaw? How many games and who wins? Davos in 4 4. With a first week bye into the second round; what are you going to do with the few extra days off? Explain… Get drunk and find some hookers that Scotty p hasn’t touched 5. Vancouver Wolves & Chicago Phoenix in the first round, who wins, how many games and do you like this match-up? Vancouver in 4 6. Moscow Menace enter the Playoffs as Victory Cup champions after winning the Continental cup last season. Is the Victory cup curse real and will Moscow be bounced in the first round or will Moscow make the finals again this season? Explain your reasoning …. They are going to make it to the conference finals and then lose because the curse is alive and well but spartan does something to mess with things.

And i wanted to be your AGM

Cannot argue with you on that one. Just better look out for Guntis Gavilrovs and Mark Calaway. They are carrying the load on the Vancouver blue line. Good luck to Andrew Skilton, but please dont cry too much when Toronto loses!!!!

Way off!!

Were you driving in a monsoon? The wipers were working overtime!!

Its almost playoff hockey time. Woo hoo! Time to start growing the beards and get ready to step it up a notch. Guntis Gavilrovs, is providing free lessons to any player who wants to learn how to be a beast on the ice and has broken the top ten in hits and shots blocked. Now, you may be thinking whoopie, that’s not that impressive just being in the top 10. Guntis is a part of the team and the wealth is spread amongst all of us. He shares the glory with his aggressive talents just like Logan Ninefingers shares the points. Mark Calaway dominates the defense all while staying out of the penalty box. Liv Slater puts the puck in the net more often than Rip Wheeler says, “I do what I do.” Gavilrovs even tries to give teammates a boost and lets them get into a scrap or two in between his own glove dropping. Even still, Guntis has gone toe to toe with more opponents than Rip Wheeler has blocked a shot. Gavilrovs latest evidence of generosity is his willingness to bring along a teammate when he is hanging out with some high profile celebrities. I guess they are called A-list. Maybe that’s because Guntis Gavilrovs is an A-list hockey player. 215 words

1. Has your player been performing as you’ve expected? Not at all. I was hoping my player would be crushing opponents and blocking all kinds of shots but my player is a big sissy. 2. When VHL playoffs sims happen, do you check individual game scores first or go straight to the playoff bracket section? I check the scores first and take a look at who’s on a hot streak and then I hire a gypsy to put a hex on them if they are playing against Vancouver. 3. Who do you predict will win the Victory Cup? I think that Moscow has the best chance right now because Vancouver will be playing Toronto and dominating so that puts them out of their misery. 4. Have you scoped out next season’s draft class? Any prospects stick out to you? I have not looked at the draft class enough to say that someone sticks out. I am hoping that Manny Ceson actually jumps into the E and then the VHL . 5. Are you following the VHL’s social media? VHL has a social media? That should answer your question. I do not follow anything on social media. VHL is my social media. I dont have time for anything else. 6. What is one stat or detail you wish would be added to STHS? I think steals would be an interesting stat, or even a stat involving a ± on the puck. It would make for some interesting discussion. 7. The NFL season has started! Do you watch American football? If you do, what is your favorite NFL team? I do watch NFl at times. As far as a favorite team I have to say that my favorite team has been the Patriots for many years, but over the past few years, I am game time decision. There are teams I dislike more than others and do not want them to win. 8. What sports team would you most like to see play live (doesn’t have to be hockey!)? It comes down to opportunity more than picking a team. The price of the ticket has to be right, the seat has to be good, preferable a suite. The convenience of getting in and out of the stadium has to be right. And who I go with affects the decision as well.