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Armani's game puck

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"Alright everyone gather around!" The Ottawa Lynx coach says as he blows the whistle at the Ottawa Lynx preseason practice. Armani Calamari has been subtly impressing the staff at Ottawa with his improvement since his time at Philadelphia and the team has a surprise for him. "It's time to announce captains and alternative captains! These guys are showing off what they can do time and time again and I am glad to announce who gets the patch this season. The main captain for this season is Ben Aky!" Ben smiles as he shakes the coaches hand and the team gives him a small applause.


"Hey man congratulations" Armani says as he shakes Ben's hand "you definitely deserve that patch, glad to be playing with you"


"Alright settle down" the coach smiles "the first alternative captain we can announce is Armani Calamari!" Armani looks shocked but quickly recovers and smiles as he shakes everyone's hand. "And the next alternative captain is Alex Parise!" The goalie has a similar reaction to Armani "now we will be putting the new patches on by the next practice. We have a lot of work to do this season but I do see us improving as the season goes on. Can't wait to see what you guys do this season!"


"Man we have a team that can be so good soon you two " Ben smiles at Armani and Alex "but it's gonna be a process. I do think coach made a good decision and I do think you will be great alternative captains. Hell I think you two can end up being main captains somewhere!"


"Thanks man" Armani says "means a lot coming from you. Now come on we got some more practice to do" We cut to a few games into the season and the Lynx are celebrating a good shootout win over the Minnesota Storm. Armani had also achieved a big milestone and had gotten his first VHLM goal and 2 assists.


"Hey man that was a clutch performance there" Ben smiles in between drinks of water "getting your first goal is always memorable and I am glad to see you get it"


"Man I am so excited" Armani cheers "that is one thing I can cross off the old bucket list" the coach then settles down the team and prepares his post game speech


"This was an amazing game from us" the coach smiles "we did not give up and we played our hearts out. I believe the game puck however should go to our center Armani Calamari for his first ever goal in this league! Congratulations!" The team cheers as Armani grabs the puck and puts it into his travel backpack "we still have a lot of work to do so let's not let up. I am very proud of all of you today"


"I am just glad to see us play so well against one of the better teams in the league" Alex says "we could defend better though I think we need to definitely work on that"


"Noted Alex we will focus on that in practice. But for now just go rest because you have all earned it!" They all get up to go back to the hotel in high spirits.

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Review: Really well-written article. As 16z said, I like how you took this topic and ran with it, adding great details that sound very realistic. Paragraphs are used appropriately, makes for a better look and makes it easy to understand. Only suggestions I have are an image potentially, as well as punctuation in certain spots if I’m being picky haha. But overall very well done :) 

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