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The Ultimatum of the Knight


Phil

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YOU GOT NUTHING ON ME JASON BOURNE.

 

 

 

Hi, I'm Phil Knight. You may remember me from such articles as "How to Use Hockey Tape to Wax Your Chest" and "Look Out! Sandro's Hit Puberty."

 

Sometimes, a little incentive goes a long way. We are entering the 40th season in the VHL's history (or has it actually started yet?) Regardless I have always liked the idea of a Team Point Task.

 

Last time I did one, I was on the best ever Davos team. Now I'm on Riga so naturally, I want to destroy Davos.

 

I have always prided myself on being on teams with great lockerroom atmospheres and even if they did suck, I would make them not so.

 

So I have to prove this. I told Riga that if we don't do this, I am done with that organization.. forever.

 

But I'm raising the stakes.. if we don't finish in the top three... I will leave.

 

Although, I clearly haven't thought this out fully because Villeneuve is such a scrub that no one will actually want him. But still You were all just MATT DAMON'ED

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