K1NG LINUS 145 Posted March 31, 2019 Share Posted March 31, 2019 Juan Juandice, @Jus the starting goaltender for the Saskatoon Wild, has just been reported to have eaten an entire puck. Reporting live from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, we heard from his teammate on the Saskatoon Wild, defenseman Rusty Shackleford, who claimed that in the middle of what he called "a wild bender," Juandice was apparently convinced to scarf down an entire hockey puck for its "goalie-boosting powers." While it is unclear what the exact circumstances were leading up to this event, Shackleford was able to ramble out a slurred series of words that were deciphered to mean "It all started when we were talking about how to stop a puck, you must think like a puck. One thing led to another, and the guy was eating a puck. An actual whole puck." It should be noted that Shackleford himself reeked of what can only be assumed to be a copious amount of cheap beer and whiskey, and that he may not be as reliable of a source as one would hope for. Pictured Above: A picture of what is believed to be the puck that Juandice devoured, part of the way through his feast. Upon further investigation, multiple sources are now reporting that the alleged "puck" may have actually been a Ding Dong all along. We have reached out to Juandice for comment and are waiting to hear back. Renomitsu, Jus, Gustav and 1 other 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gustav 6,086 Posted March 31, 2019 Share Posted March 31, 2019 Weird funny article. I like it. K1NG LINUS 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jus 35 Posted March 31, 2019 Share Posted March 31, 2019 There's nothing about this that I don't love. K1NG LINUS 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peace 1,518 Posted March 31, 2019 Share Posted March 31, 2019 Does it make you better at stopping them? *Ducks and rolls out of the topic to avoid flying objects* Jus 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jus 35 Posted March 31, 2019 Share Posted March 31, 2019 Only on days I remember to eat them. I rely on my d-men to supply me them pregame K1NG LINUS 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1NG LINUS 145 Posted March 31, 2019 Author Share Posted March 31, 2019 2 minutes ago, Peace said: Does it make you better at stopping them? *Ducks and rolls out of the topic to avoid flying objects* oof Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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