Jump to content

10 Prospects who are a long way from the VHL: Part 2 [1/2]


Quik

Recommended Posts

A look into the medium-term future of the VHL

10 names to keep an eye on; part 2

 

Helsinki, FINALND - In part 1, we looked at 6 names who seem destined to one day be added to VHL lore. Some of them, already, more promising than others, they all share one thing in common: a potential future in the VHL. Now, we take a look at another 4 names who could one day find themselves among VHL greats. Or even in the VHL. Or perhaps they will quit hockey altogether and never make a name for themselves in the sport. It really is impossible to

 

Cleetus No Last Name Given

Born in misery state, Missouri, Cleetus No Last Name Given was adopted by the sorority Kappa Kappa Nu as their good deed for 2018. Unfortunately for him, the sorority president was not the brightest, and when she was told that she would need to give him a last name, as his was not given, she literally wrote down "No Last Name Given". Fortunately, she, and her family, had a LOT more money than brains, as her parents were trust fund babies, living off the wealth of her grandparents. When it comes to hockey, Cleetus does one thing, and one thing only: he shoots! From in front of the crease, he shoots. From the tops of the circles, he shoots. From the centre-ice red line, damn right he shoots. Cleetus is a shooter. He doesn't skate. He doesn't pass. He. Just. Shoots! If he gets an assist? It's off a rebound.

VHL Comparable: Dany Ribody (most shots by a player with under 200 goals/500 points)

 

Baby Shark

Yes, the shark that has given anyone with a child, niece, nephew, cousin or sibling under 5 endless nights of terror is planning to, possibly, join the VHL one day. No, this shark is not related to Elasmobranch Fish, or his agent Sharkstrong, though he plays a very similar style of game that made Fish a household name in S65. Yes, Baby Shark plays a hard hitting, self-sacrificing defensive game that, to the naked eye, is very underappreciated in todays era of analytics and number-crunching. A mobile skater, Baby Shark looks like he could become a defensive anchor for any team looking to have a shut-down defender on their roster. Let it be known now, there are no fish out of water jokes made when an attacker tries to get by Baby Shark, as the young defender devours competition like a snack before the main course.

VHL Comparable: Elasmobranch Fish

 

Ulysses Franklin Osborne

A player with a mysterious origin, Osborne's parents found him in a field one day, in nothing but a blanket and holding an oddly shaped rattle. Growing up, he has always been one of the fastest, strongest skaters for his age group. So much so that, this year, as a 13 year old, he is playing in a league with 15 and 16 year olds, and holding his own in the process. As a center, he seems to be able to see plays unfold before they happen, as he almost always has perfect timing on when he releases a pass, or a shot. His timing is impeccable, and, conjoined with his pinpoint accuracy, makes him an elite scorer. As always, we will see how things translate, but as a 13-year old standing 6'2, and 170 lbs, he shows no signs of being unable to carry his skills forward as he continues his hockey path. In fact, he seems almost super-human, and destined to become one of the league's all-time greats, should he continue blazing his trail on the ice!

VHL Comparable: Gabriel McAllister

 

Scotty Labatte

Heir to the Labatte fortune, Labatte is a diminutive goaltender who rings true the expression: goalies are f@#$%^& weird. Known to literally stand on his head before pre-game warmups, Labatte always has to be the 3rd player on the ice, and no goalie can hit the ice before him. Once on the ice, his very specific warmup routine includes stretching, blocker saves, glove saves, exactly 2 shots to his mask, followed by pad saves. Whatever he does must work, as he carried his team to the regional PeeWee championship, averaging only 1.34 goals against per game. What makes that even more incredible is that his team has very little in the way of offence, averaging only a slightly higher 1.63 goals per game. While needing to carry the load every time his team is on the ice isn't the greatest thing, it is giving the young Labatte plenty of practice in high-intensity games, which will prepare him for being a star at the next level; if he doesn't burn out.

VHL Comparable: Maxim Desny

 

Honourable Mentions: Saitama, Defence; Light Yagami, Left Wing; Anfernee Tomkins, Right Wing; Dolan Chrump, Center; Jabba D'Hut, Goaltender

 

As you can see, there are plenty of prospects who can one day make an impact in the VHL. Of course, we are unsure if they will ever make it, or if they will ever hit their potential, should they make it. But, this is a fun exercise in looking into the future and seeing what players may, or may not, make up the fabric of the future VHL.

 

Bonus: Beau Louth

The center currently plays on a team just below the VHLM level, in Vancouver BC. Much like the previously mentioned Yamcha Jr., Louth is a hard worker who goes to the office with a smile on his face every day. His teammates love his go-getter attitude, and his coaches love that he is always in the gym. Indeed, he is like a dog on a bone when it comes to getting extra practice time! The training has been hit or miss, and some do question if it's a matter of skill or smarts, as he has only barely surpassed the point-per-game mark over his last 6 seasons with the junior team. Time will tell if he is ever truly a VHL player, his effort is there, it's just a matter of him putting up results.

VHL Comparable: None available

 

End of Part 1 - 1020 Words; Claiming for ACL: W/E July 21 (Donation Doubles 2/2), July 28.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

25 minutes ago, sjs88speed said:

I have one question for this. Are these actual names being used? Amazing names lol. Serge Iblocka? Legendary.

For the most part, they're just random names lol. There's a couple that I might use for future players, but, it was mostly for fun haha

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • DollarAndADream changed the title to 10 Prospects who are a long way from the VHL: Part 2 [1/2]

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...