Legend

[animal74 1,606]

“Good day, laddie!” a voice says firmly.

 

The clerk at the VHLM head office looks up from his screen and his eyes grow wide and his mouth drops open.

 

“I said, ‘Good day’! Do you not speak the common tongue, man?”

 

The clerk pushes his chair back as a huge shadow falls upon his workspace as the owner of the voice approaches. The clerk swallows and stammers, “Ah, ah, g-g-g-good d-d-day, s-s-sir. What, ah, c-c-can I d-d-d-do for you?"

 

 

The giant of a man bellows a chuckle and strokes his full black beard. “Well, now, I’ve heard you can play hockey around here. Is this where I sign up for the V-H-Hell? I figured I’ve been through hell so I can handle the challenge of the V-H-Hell.”

 

“Ah, it’s VHL, sir,” says the clerk gathering his composure and removing a form from a stack, placing it in front of him. He selects a pen from a holder and start writing on the form. “Victory Hockey League and actually this is the minor league office. You’ll have to start here anyway.”

 

“Victory?” guffawed the man smiling wide, “I like the sound of that. I’ve seen many victories in my day.”

 

“I’m sure you have, sir. Where are you from?”

 

“I’m from a place that you probably haven’t heard of called Drenai but I come by way of Scotland. Been playing my hockey there for the last few years.”

 

The clerk continues writing, “Ok, Scotland, then. What position do you play?”

 

“Wing. Right side.” The bearded man looks around the office. “Clean place. You don’t have any problems with bandits or thieves? Nadir, perhaps?”

 

“Ah, no.” The clerk glances at him warily. “We have Marauders down in Miami and they’re the champions but they’re not usually too much trouble.”

 

“I’ve cut down many a marauder who thought they were a champion. Just say the word and I’ll hunt them down!”

 

The clerk stares hard at the man. “Yeah, that won’t be necessary.” He slides the form and the pen across the counter. “Please fill this out and once it has been processed you can check your email for offers from the VHLM teams.” He looks behind the bearded man. “Do you have equipment?”

 

Putting down the pen, the Scotsman steps back, reaches over his shoulder and something metallic slices through the air with a hint of song. The clerk feels the air rush past his face and when opens his eyes again, the man is brandishing a shining double-headed axe with a black haft. A real one.

 

“This is all the equipment I need, laddie!”

 

 

The clerk stands frozen with a horror-stricken look. Time seems to stand still as the light of the office refracts off the dual blades in all directions.

 

Throwing his head back and roaring with laughter, the man slides the axe into the sheath on his back and then slaps his knee. “Oh, laddie,” he sputters, “your face is priceless! I’d give a skin of Ventrian red to see that again!” Another fit of laughter as he wipes his eyes. “Hahaha, don’t worry I have my gear and hockey stick at the hotel.”

 

Now ghost-white, the clerk points to the form with a shaking finger. “Fill it out,” he squeaks.

 

Grabbing the pen and still snickering, the axeman hurriedly fills out the form and hands it back to the still trembling clerk. “There you go, laddie. My apologies, didn’t mean to scare you so bad.”

 

The clerk takes the form. “No problem,” he rasps, “happens all the time.” Swallowing, he looks at the form to check its validity. “So you will now be registered in the VHLM pool of prospects. You will be contacted shortly by interested teams, Mr…. Deathwalker?”

 

There’s another grin spreading across the bearded face and he gives the clerk a wink. “Laddie, just call me Legend!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 12, 2020 by animal74

[Juice 641]

In b4 20 PIM a game