Flying High with the Iron Eagles (and other news)

[Mutti 191]

Hello, hi, how are you?
I hope this article finds you in a pleasant mood! I certainly am in a pleasant mood because I can bring you news from and surrounding the hockey world that I have gathered for you in the last week! Because gossiping is my business and business is booming.

 

Iconic Ikea.. Ikeaonic?

 

Last week I have talked about how I ventured on a trip to Västerås, Sweden. Now, there are many things that are happening in this wonderful country everyday that I cannot possibly cover in here. However, an interesting proposal in terms of meals for Iron Eagles players. Local chef Mikeal Mëatbålls proposed to deliver fresh, warm and traditional Swedish cuisine to players during trainings. The meals would be designed to be balanced in nutritions, to give enough energy and strength to play like beasts.
It is said, however, that a minor side effect may occur. That is chronic furniture-shopping.

 

Litvinov? More like Litvinoff.

 

Do you remember the jerseys I showed you in my last article? Did you like them?
Well, too bad. The ownership of Litvinov hockey team does not even want to hear about a possible sharing of ideas for logos, jerseys’ designs, etc.
I am fairly disappointed and I am sure, many fans will be as well. No matter, though, because this unwillingness is probably caused by stress and focus on their local play-off games, where Verva made it to the semifinals. So, best of luck to them, I guess. Västerås has far superior jerseys anyways.

 

P-D-P

 

As spring, and with it the whole season, is in full motion, all teams try their hardest to show what they’re made of. Some to impress their friends and relatives, some to show off in front of VHL scouts or representatives of the teams that drafted them, or, like our favourite goalie Ondrej, they just love to try their hardest for their team to shine and to succeed.

Yesterday, during Iron Eagles’ training, I came up to the bench to talk to the young goaltender and asked him what strategy is the team working on/with:

 

“I’d say that guys are focusing on tactics that is divided into three phases, sort of:

 

1.      Pew – you shoot at the net however you can. The opposing team’s net, that is. Once this succeeds, it goes into the second phase.

2.      Die – if your shots are well-aimed and you build up a big lead, the dreams of opposing team about winning simply pass away. Die, we can say.

3.      Pie – After successfully implementing those two phases, you should be able to win the game, which leads to a treat in form of a cake as a reward. Mostly, we can count on a local pie.

 

So, when you combine these phases, you get PewDiePie. And the biggest advantage to this tactic is that if you try to look it up on YouTube, you only get some weird man screaming at barrels or playing Happy Wheels. Thus, no one can take inspiration from us on how exactly are we making it work.”

 

Well, there you have it. Let’s hope that this innovative tactic brings success in the regular season and especially in the post season. Fingers crossed to the first series not becoming a T-Series. Yuck.

 

 

 

And that is all for this week of gossips, wonders and hockey. Stay tuned for next time, I will bring you more and fresh news next week!

 

-        Ben Icio del Torro

578 words capped for week ending 03/31/2024