TMZ Catches Gainer on Vacation

[joeg 69]

One of our on the ground reporters, Chad Monstinglopsingbergershine was sulking around the Miami airport when he caught up with Toronto Legion player Joseph Gainer. The following is a transcript of their conversation.

 

CM: Joe, Joe! Do you have a second to talk?

 

JG: Ugh, fine.

 

CM: What are you doing in Miami instead of Toronto? Where are you heading?

 

JG: I came down to spend some time with my family and friends in the Florida heat. We're going to catch our plane and head to Puerto Rico for a week.

 

CM: So you flew to Florida to fly to Puerto Rico? Why not just stay here?

 

JG: To get away from you.

 

CM: Ok, I had that coming. Our insider VHLM sources say that you are afraid of flying, and only took planes when you needed to in the VHLM and actually took a bus most of the time. I believed they called in aviophobia. Any comment?

 

JG: The only part I take issue with is calling it a phobia. There is nothing irrational about fearing flying. You're in a giant, pressurized metal tube, 30 000 feet in the air, where any number of things you can think of can go wrong, and even some you can't think of.

 

CM: Amen to that brother. Hey, you're looking kind of chunky. Shouldn't you be in Toronto putting in the work? I've heard that Toronto is going to take another winger to replace you? What do you think about that?

 

JG: 1. I think that you're lucky that there are at least 5 police officers that I can see right now. 2. I'm the same weight from the end of the season. 3. I welcome whatever role Toronto puts me in, and also welcome any addition to the team that will help us reach the ultimate goal of raising the Continental Cup.

 

CM: Awesome. Fantastic man! Well, enjoy your vacation and we'll take again soon?

 

JG: Not likely.

 

WC/327