Update on my life outside the VHL(trigger warning suicide and sexual harassment warning)

[UnknownMinion 728]

So this started a while back like in November shortly after my sister birthday. She came to me about a guy who had said he wanted to commit suicide to her, I told her to talk to the VPs at school and told my parents about what she said to me when I got home, we all sat down and tried to get her and the boy the help they needed. Following that day the boy started sexual harassing my sister making comments and threading to rape her. She got scared and so did I. Me and her friends all said stay away from him we had no proof of what was happening and no case because of that, it got dark my sister was in pain but they stop speaking so slowly got better. We thought all of this was behind us.

 

fast forward to last Tuesday I was about to go to bed(my parents out of town) when my parents called panicking. Over the phone they stated my sister told her friend she wasn’t going to make it to the weekend the suicidal feelings she had were back, this scared the Hell out of me my parents told me not to leave her side, so until they got back to town I was shaken by her side from 11pm till about 1am nobody moved, nobody spoke for an hour, I think she could see the fear in my eyes, my parents got their we took to place for people who were threading suicide, they rejected her entire, she has no doctor note confirming the feelings so they couldn’t take her in, none of us would let her leave her friends of our sides from that moment. I found out the day after she told her friend this stuff and her friends did everything they could to find out my mothers number,

 

move to Friday we are walking to school, see tells me she was dating  the bitch who threaded to rape her by choice. For the past couple week. The feeling came back after she started seeing him again. I wanted to beat the crap out of the guy but she said if anything happens to him(including him going though on suicide, she would kill her self) I have had a real conversation with here from that day I pissed off with her for dating the guy and not talking to me about the feelings I can look at with our pain. I’m watching her slowly kill her mental heath, and maybe her self. Nothing I do helps the pain I see when I look at her or the feeling of wanting to kill her “boyfriend when I see him”

 

what do I do at this point what can I do. Other then watch this happen.

Edited April 12, 2022 by Baozi

[Baozi 1,662]

Sorry to hear you're in this kind of situation. I can't really relate here nor do I have any kind of experience in said matters. Would suggest you talk to someone trained to deal with these situations tho or something.

Edited April 12, 2022 by Baozi

[Brandon 426]

Damn, I'm really sorry that you are going through this @Minion That's an extremely scary situation to be in, and I hope everything sorts itself out in the best way possible. Also, everything that I write below is my opinion, I'm in no way a professional.

 

Right now, immediately, what you can do is be there for her, provide her with a safe place to talk about things (no matter how serious) and show understanding and trust. Be honest about how you feel as well, but caring in how you phrase things as she is in a fragile emotional state. It's difficult because she should obviously cut ties with him, but it can be really hard in some cases to convince someone like your sister when they are in it. The most important thing is showing compassion.

 

Truthfully, your sister isn't making smart decisions, what he has said / is saying is both scary and dangerous and he doesn't sound safe, or stable. I'm guessing she is young (teenager) because at that age, someone is figuring out how healthy relationships are formed. For some young people any attention that they get from a friend, no matter it being positive or negative, feels like good attention because there isn't an alternative person that gives them that same attention right now.

 

I would say along with that, the best thing you can do would be to have your parents get her to a doctor to find her a licensed psychologist / therapist to go to. With regards to financials, therapists can be expensive, but I believe if you go to the doctor they can find something that can work. There are also sliding scale therapists out there, which have reduced costs dependent on income levels. A licensed professional will be able to talk with her and find out what is truly going on, because this is an unhealthy attachment.

 

School counsellors are also a good resource for young kids to use.

 

Best of luck, I hope everything turns out alright.

Edited April 12, 2022 by Brandon

[Ben 200]

While that is tough let’s look at something positive, at least you know your sister has good friends trying to help her in anyway they can even through hard times! It’s easier to be someone’s friend when they are at their best then when they are at their worst! It’s overall what separates real friends from fake ones!