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Following The Pope failing to prosper playing hockey, he decided his work was best served at the Vatican. However, he decided that the world needed was a literal cow who was capable of playing hockey. After much praying and work towards solving this problem he discovered a cow who was capable of skating and holding a hockey stick with his mouth. He then decided what was best to be done going forward was signing this cow up for some beer league hockey where the cow immediately scored a goal, got an assist, and killed a man after falling on them after being tripped. This was a sign that the world needed the cow and the cow was ready to go to the VHLM. Now you may be wondering what is going on and how is a cow being allowed to play in the VHLM, but as has been stated in many hit movies, "There ain't no rule that says the dog can't play basketball." This is as true as it is in the VHLM as there is no rule that says you can't a cow and that cow can't crush a player after laying a hit.

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https://vhlforum.com/topic/147605-the-birth-of-a-literal-holy-cow/
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