Duddy 159 Posted March 29, 2015 Share Posted March 29, 2015 Thomas Duddy talks to the press. After weeks of silence from the otherwise extremely outspoken Austrian Superstar, he decided that it was time to get his face back out into the lime light. Many reporters expected another fantastic performance on the mic from the star of the Ottawa Lynx. They were wrong. “Hello ladies and gentlemen of the press, my name is Thomas Duddy, I play left wing for the Ottawa Lynx. I’m here today to answer your questions today. Usually I do the talking and you do the listening, but today you get the special once in a lifetime opportunity to talk as well. So be wise and choose the right questions to not squander this chance you got. Let’s start.” Random Reporter: Yeah, um…. How would you rate your season up until now? “Steve, I can call you Steve, right? I don’t really care about your name any way, so that’s not even important. You start with the lamest question anybody could’ve asked. No that’s not totally true, you could’ve also asked how I’m feeling today. That question would’ve been much worse. How would I rate my season? As the undisputed leader of the offense, I rate my season as a failure. I just didn’t handle out as much punishment as I need to try and save this hockey league. Save all of those lost souls that just can’t seem to find the light, the salvation they need. Words can’t express how disappointed in myself I am. But that will change, sooner rather than later. Next.” Other reporter: Do you get along with your teammates? “That’s a rhetorical question, right? They don’t like me, they love me. They eat up all the words I feed to the. I give them what they crave, I give them what they need. I give them the comfort cuddling as well as give them a knife to their rip cage if they fall out off line. I give them heaven, I give them hell. I am their judge, their jury and their executioner. Next” Reporter #3: I really don’t want to ask you a question right now. “Why not? I’m the nicest person you will meet today. Go ahead and try.” Reporter #3: Okay, I will give it a try. If you could be a vegetable, what vegetable would you want to be the most? And explain why. “Bravo my friend, best question I ever received. Hmm if I could chose what I want to be, I would probably be, why in the blue hell would you ask me that? I’m here to give you the chance of a life time and you come up with this? That’s really the best thing you could think of? I’m really disappointed in you or no I’m not really that disappointed. I didn’t expect anything better from you low lights. That’s why I never let you people talk. This will probably the last time I let you talk, from now on you guys just will have to listen to me sprinkle my wisdom on you. Now it’s time for you all to go home, kiss your loved ones and hope that I shined at least a little light into your dark souls. Good bye.” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laflamme 376 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Content: 2/2 - Awesome job, 539 words. Grammar: 2/2 - Only one spelling mistake. Teammates---> Team-mates or team mates. Appearance: 1/1 - Lots of color, pictures look mint. Good job man. Final 6/6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CowboyinAmerica 2,756 Posted April 3, 2015 Share Posted April 3, 2015 Claimed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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