Captain's Log, stardate 31012022

[Mongoose87 384]

Captain's Log, stardate 31012022. I have completed my first season on this other Earth. The locals, despite my unparalleled performance, chose not to recognize me with an award. Fortunately, I am extremely humble. My team, the Hounds, met defeat in the first round of the playoffs, which gave me a second opportunity to use my remarkable humility, in addition to the unjust denial of my -the- award.

 

For the first time, I am longing for my old mission. The five year mission of the UFHD brought me to new places, taught me new dirty dangles and sick dekes. Here, I see the same things every week: the same saves, the same shots, the same species of women.

 

WOMEN! SO MANY HUMAN WOMEN! Before I could meet women with any combination of ear shape and forehead ridge you could imagine! Even some with extra neck ridges! I can just imagine, I'd meet them at the bar after the game, show them my award - THE AWARD, which I should've won - and then tell them what it's like to skate in the stars. But here, they're all so smooth, their ears are boring and round. I think I'd settle for someone green at this point.

 

I think I'll discuss these feelings with Mr Puck. He has always been a dear, close friend. Teekirque out.