See More Butts partying in DC!

[fonziGG 1,065]

We, Chicago Phoenix, as a organization, team and family have been working, eating, sleeping and protein farting together in a respectful and ethical manner! Just kidding, we've been absolutely destroying the locker rooms. I'm pretty sure I saw someone have a protein diarrhea at some point in the DC establishment. I mean, that would explain why they shit the bed so hard. However, DC may be a great team with great management in Enorama, I wouldn't personally protein diarrhea all over their walls and stuff. That was gross, weird and confusing. How about we aim in the toilet bud? Even in public washrooms, that throws me the hell off. I mean, your hands are worse off. What the hell are you doing to either pick it up off the bowl or shit in your hands. Yuck. I mean, we might need to trade that guy. We all struggle sometimes but that was fucked up if you ask me.

 

Things were getting really rowdy though. I saw Board Game projectile vomit from the disgusting concoction we made for him to drink. Poor bastard had no idea what we made him but he drank it. What a legend. I call it, "the Devils Crotch". Why is it called that? It is called that because I put 1 of every alcohol on the table into a shot glass and a bit of sriracha. Mixed it with a spoon and it was DISGUSTING looking. What a god damn trooper, he deserves a medal for that regardless. I was throwing up nearly because of the smell. I think the next morning, he mentioned that his ass was on flames. It was probably the "Devils Crotch", if you ask me. 

 

During the series, we've been in video review, training, gym, tactical training and team bonding sessions. Theres been no time to actually visit the city of DC. So, while we were there, we made sure to go see the capital and visit President Biden. However, President Biden was slightly too busy to see us. In fact, if I remember correctly, I remember the President saying, "Who the fuck is that?"

(President Biden speaking on Chicago visiting US Capitol."

 

Whatever, his loss if you ask me. I mean, more time to make frozen protein cheesecakes, pop corn chicken and other things for my snack city baby. Thats what I call my freezer, "Snack City".  Snack City is loaded up as well. I keep some Halo Top in there as well. Next to Snack City, I keep 2 washers and 2 dryers. As you know, Gym, Tan and Laundry baby. You got to keep the clothes fresh and clean, steamed and look crispy otherwise you're not dressed for success. Keep the protein high, clothes laundered and I'm an athlete for a living so I'm working out heavily. Its sad really, I don't have much time to rebuild this team up to take a task load off me. However, I'm appreciating the hard work this season. I think, I'm prepared to get a team in as soon as next off-season. It's about time for that.