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bottles-of-soju-move-along-a-conveyor-on

Soju when he was just a wee little lad. 

 

Thank you for tuning into the prospect scouting report of a bottle of Soju. Tasked in stopping pucks. Now the premise of this seems faulty since a soju bottle is made of glass and a frozen rubber puck has the ability to shatter glass bottles. But counter point when the puck hits the glass along the boards it does not shatter. There for without further research or deduction we can conclude that this Soju bottle repels glass, but only because this Soju bottle was built from the same glass surrounding the boards of the arena. 

 

Soju was first scouted by @Lemorse7 during a bantam hockey game in Busan, South Korea his hometown. The current GM of the Philadelphia Reapers was impressed with his ability to stop pucks despite the fact he looks smaller than a soccer goalie in his net. Pucks above knee hard were extremely difficult to stop for Soju but anything along the ice was getting bottled aside. This is likely due to the ability of a glass bottle to slide quickly across the ice. 2 years later he would be selected 10th overall in the VHLM draft by Philadelphia. 

 

Pros:

Agility - As mentioned earlier the fact Soju is a glass bottle allows him to shift across the ice with unparalleled speed. Something many scouts find intriguing as quite often goalie have trouble adjusting to the speed of the pro game. 

Style Control - A soju bottle is kind of a one trick pony so it shouldn't surprise anyone that one of Soju's pro's is the fact his game is always consistent. He isn't going to be flopping around out there like HOFer Dominik Hasek. But his consistency brings an air of calmness to the team in front of him.  

Reaction Time - It's like console vs. pc. The human body moves like a pc while the soju bottle has an aim bot built into itself to track the puck. Being an inanimate object has this advantage, as well as having puck tracking technology integrated into your bottle cap. 

 

Cons:

Size - Again as mentioned earlier size is probably the biggest con to Soju's game the fact he's only twice the size o the puck and 1/50th of the net means a lot of time's he can't stop anything over his head. 

Rebound Control - Though pictures have leaked with Soju in full goalie equipment, he can't escape the simple fact he has no arms or legs meaning the puck is consistently bouncing off these artificially made noodle like limbs. 

Skating -  Agility is a two edged sword for Soju, though he moves quicker than any other goalie the fact he has no feet means he can't pivot. A goalie who can't pivot is a huge question mark. 

 

Friends Lol GIF by Max


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https://vhlforum.com/topic/146614-prospect-scouting-report-soju-g/
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