An Interview with YNFR

[twists 409]

An Interview with YNFR (Youre Not Fucking Retiring)

 

Vhl.com staff: Retiring, you made a pretty big impact in your first season with Miami, how did you manage that as such a low TPE player?

 

YNFR: Well, as mentioned in my biography, I am a literal lab grown human. I had many current VHL players train me on the game when I was only 8 years old. Plus my dad, Eric Queefson, gave everything he had to transfer his talents to me. Long story short, I'm just that good.

 

Vhl.com staff: It seems you were hampered in the playoffs putting up only 1 goal, any reason this occurred? 

 

YNFR: Yeah, my fucking coach @Mysterious_Fish didn't even give me top minutes. I told him time and time again, if we want to win the cup give your big boi some more ice time. He refused. It's just that simple folks.

 

Vhl.com staff: Is there anything you would like to say about the conclusion of your season? Good or bad? 

 

YNFR: Well, I want to call out @Ricer13. He fooled us in the regular season thinking that he was a good goalie, but man, when we played Saskatoon he proved everyone wrong. He was atrocious. Honestly, I hope when I die that Ricer is there to lower me into my grave so he can let me down one last time.

 

 

Vhl.com staff: What has your offseason looked like? Are you putting more work in or having some fun?

 

YNFR: I'm always putting in more work, since my Dad, the lab scientists, and the VHL players are always performing experiments on me to see if they can make me an even better VHL player. I've had my DNA manipulated so many times that I might not even be related to my father anymore. Other than that, I like to sit at home and play some chel with the boys. On Friday nights I tend to get a couple teammates over, hire some escorts, and get some blow from my hombre Juan down in Mexico. It's a good time, you should visit.

 

Vhl.com staff: You've been a big proponent of taking care of your mental health this year, why is that?

 

YNFR: I think a lot of VHL players don't seem to address their concerning mental health problems. It's honestly becoming an epidemic. I mean go to vhlforum.com and check some of the statuses these players are posting, it's beyond out of pocket. Hopefully the VHL will create a new program that allows these players to get help.

 

Vhl.com staff: Lastly, what are you looking forward to next season?

 

YNFR: Hopefully I can get drafted by a competent VHLM GM and make a run for the cup. If not, I'll just grind on a bottom feeder and do some stat padding. Either way will get me picked higher in the VHL draft. I'm still not looking forward to spending a year in the VHLE. Just seems like it'll be a waste of time for everyone involved. Also, shout out my boy @frescoelmo for becoming the head mod. I can't think of anyone who deserves it less! Having him lead the mod team next season will be a trip.

 

[Mysterious_Fish 387]

2 hours ago, twists said:

Yeah, my fucking coach @Mysterious_Fish didn't even give me top minutes. I told him time and time again, if we want to win the cup give your big boi some more ice time. He refused. It's just that simple folks.

I tried u on line 1 and we lost both games in the sim

[twists 409]

15 minutes ago, Mysterious_Fish said:

I tried u on line 1 and we lost both games in the sim

 

I'm just giving you some shit dont take me seriously lol

[Mysterious_Fish 387]

3 hours ago, twists said:

 

I'm just giving you some shit dont take me seriously lol

ik