Cunningham Needs to Be Stopped

[thadthrasher 1,766]

Not everyone around the league realizes this, but Titus Cunningham has an intense love of chicken wings. This man causes fear for any restaurant owner who dares to offer a discounted wing night, because Cunningham will be there. Not only will he be there, but he'll devour any wings that are placed in front of him. He doesn't care how big or small, nor how spicy or mild, Cunningham licks them clean. Recently, the Buffalo Wild Wings near Cunningham's apartment hosted a chicken wing eating contest, and Cunningham was the first man to sign up. He was relatively unknown in the world of chicken wing eating contests, but the crowd knew him from hockey. He drew in a massive crowd and tons of competition. It was Cunningham versus 12 others, and without question, Cunningham was taking the lead early on. When his opponents had five wings down, Cunningham was on 10, and wasn't slowing down in the slightest. At the end of it all, Cunningham devoured nearly three dozen wings, crushing his opponents very easily. He ran a half marathon after a few victory beers to stay in shape. This is not a man, but a machine, and he may need to be stopped.