Scouting can be dangerous - Lord Karnage Rookie Profile [Final 8/8]

[boubabi 4,725]

Lord Karnage - Rookie Profile

Position - Defense
Number - 66
Height - 6’3”
Weight - 220 lbs.
Hometown - Somalia
Age - 21
Team - Stockholm Vikings   

 

Getting his start in serious hockey as a college student in Boston, Lord Karnage's career as a Boston University Terrier lasted only one game, as he was kicked off the team after he instigated a major brawl with the Boston College Eagles that brought every player dressed for the game onto the ice and sent a number of students to the hospital.

 

After the disgraceful end of his college hockey career, the enforcer made the rounds in minor league hockey. He jumped from team to team, playing a few games for anyone who needed someone to beat up a few players before getting cut once again and going off to play video games, waiting for another phone call for a few more games.

 

All that changed when Lord Karnage received a call from an NHL executive, a man who worked for a team whose name sounded very similar to Stallas Dars. Karnage was being invited to work out for the Dars, with the possibility of a real NHL contract. Karnage flew down to Stallas, Dexas, but was arrested for drug possession before even leaving the airport. Thus ended his opportunities in the National Hockey League.

He played two seasons under the careful tutelage of Mario “KitRas” De Rossi as a member of the Bratislava (which is a horrible name for a beautiful city) Watchmen. After the league's forty first season, Lord Karnage followed his agent to Stockholm, where he became a member of the brand spankin' new Stockholm Vikings. He plays there even to this day.

 

 

What's Karnage's upside? If you ask his agent, he'll tell you it's the defensive star's physicality and scoring ability.

 

“Lord Karnage is an absolute monster on the ice. From his 6’3 220 pounds frame, he is punishing the opponent on the ice. He’s a nasty physical player and he has the ability to make some big body checks. He skates extremely well for his size with a powerful stride and displays a good lateral mobility. Karnage looks to jump up into the rush and push the offensive pace. His scoring ability is undeniable. He possesses a hard shot and does a good job getting himself into shooting positions. His offensive instincts are above average. He’s a big minute manager who can play both sides of the game. He could change a game with a big hit or with an important goal.”

 

Many scouts have noticed that the Somalian defender is very vocal on the ice.  We asked a professional scout how it’s influencing his game.

 

“If you ask anyone else, they'll add trash talking to the list. Lord Karnage is the type of man who will push you around on the ice, put the puck in the back of the net, and bully you mercilessly on his back to the bench. Karnage's presence on the ice isn't a fun time for anyone on the other team.”

 

But can this go further than just hockey chirp? We spoke to some NHL General Managers who haven’t taken a chance with Lord Karnage earlier in his career.

 

“Lord Karnage has tons of upsides, but what makes him so dangerous to grab is his explosive personality. Having a troublemaker on the ice can be beneficial. Every NHL team would like to have some Brad Marchand or Brendan Gallagher type of player in their line-up. Sometimes, though, you have to draw the line in the sand. We don’t think that Lord Karnage has this ability yet. In his junior and collegian career, he had some problems with discipline and as a professional team; we rather wait and see if he will be able to play the game with a decent amount of professionalism “

 

After his college career (see Biography) we all know that a police officer has to be in the arena whenever Lord Karnage is playing equipped with at least 1 Taser gun, some bear tranquilizer, 2 meters of rope and 12 cans of soda pop. We don’t know why, but that’s what the federal judge said. Anyway, Karnage’s police records may scare some young fans, which isn't good for business.

 

 

Last and not least, coming from a Somalian family, Karnage has an African accent which the Europeans reporters aren't very familiar. Therefore, this can create some "confusion" between him and the media. There have been occasions when Karnage was quoted as saying one thing when he actually said something completely different. For example, in the newspaper, a reporter wrote that Karnage said “I’ll kill you all, you have no respect. I’ll burn your house with your family.” When asked about that, Karnage reported he said that he said “I love you all; I have tons of respect for you. Let’s get to my house and bring your family!” Who tells the truth, we don’t even know to this day.  

 

Future Potential : A- (If he doesn't get arrested) 

Edited April 3, 2015 by boubabi

[DollarAndADream 3,356]

Overview: 2/2 - Awesome Rookie Profile. Karnage has been great so far in his career and I can only expect the same heading forward.

 

Pros & Cons: 3/3 - This was a little different. Usually the Pros & Cons section of a Rookie Profile is listed differently than you have it. Your way still works and it's all highlighted fine as well.

 

Grammar: 2/2 -

 

"bully you mercilessly on his back to the bench." - on his WAY back to the bench.

"we rather wait and see" - we WOULD rather wait and see

"the Europeans reporters" - the European reporters

 

Presentation: 1/1 - Good.

 

Overall: 8/8