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Breaking news from western south africa! LPAIUFHRBRNSKHL super star Super Cock has decided he is going to take his talents somewhere else due to the fact he has been banned for scoring 9 goals in the first period against the kamalama zippers in the cup finals. The LPAIUFHRBRNSKHL head commissioner stated "He makes this league boring we have had enough of the same team winning the cup every year and the same player winning all the mvp trophy awards! This has to end we are permanently banning him from our league and to make matters worse HE SHAGGED MY MOM!" We have an exclusive interview with the superstar! Dick mcgee is reporting on this very exciting story.

Dick mcgee: how does it feel to be banned from the 7th best league in the world?

Super cock: It feels great I do not have to put up with terrible players that can barely skate. I have found a league that will accept me for being too good. The VHL actually has players who know what hockey is! Instead of that terrible league that anyone off the street that only knows soccer can play and win the mvp award.

Dick mcgee: knowing that you were just shy of the draft do you think you will get picked up by a team?

Super cock: Absoulutly! I have the talent and skill to play in this league! Sure I will have to start at the bottom in the VHLM but it is worth it because in the long run! I have had teams already contacted me asking for me to join their team. I am very excited to kick ass in a new league.

Dick mcgee: what will you do with that first pay check?

Super Cock: Well money is not everything but it hekps with living. The other league was making me play for an hourly wage. Like what is that? Atleast with this league I can actually live instead of work my ass off and barely get by! Honestly I do not know what I will do with my money. Probably buy myself an apartment to live in.

Dick mcgee: What can you bring to the table with your skills and talents?

Super cock: I am a pure sniper I can score at will and give off some crazy passes. I am also great at checking people and giving injuries wrecking them instantly in the face that is for sure! Another one of my hidden talents is defense. People sometimes think offense do not really need to play defense. Which is totally inorrect! To win a game you have to play as a team in order to win games younalso have to carry that mentality in the playoffs. No showing off or trying to be fancy, play a simple game such as getting shots on goal for a rebound, finishing your checks, back checking. All of these will help your team compete every game!

Dick mcgee: that is all the time we have thank you for your time.

Super cock: Thank you it was a pleasure to be on globas western south african news!

522 words

Edited by MassiveCockShaggingYourMom
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https://vhlforum.com/topic/21817-claimedwho-is-super-cock-final-66/
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Content: 3/3 -Interesting... Good luck with your player :)

Grammar: 2/2 - 

south africa = South Africa 

Absoulutly = Absolutely 
hekps = helps (??)
inorrect = incorrect (??)

Appearance: 1/1 - I'll give it to you this time, but just so you know, in the future someone might take away a  .5 or something. Could use a picture and bolding to make it look nice.

Overall: 6/6

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