Claimed:The Son of Paul Makes a VHL Appearance

[AwfulHomesick 148]

The Son of Paul Makes a VHL Appearance

 

 

 

COLOGNE, GERMANY

15.2.2014

 

For any international soccer fan of the past few years, you may have heard of the name Paul the Octopus before any huge German soccer match. Paul the Octopus was hatched in October 2008. Octopi are known to be one of the most intelligent invertebrates in the world. What lead to Paul's claim to fame was predicting Germany's soccer match ups. Out of the 14 times Germany turned to Paul to find a winner, only twice has he been wrong. One Euro 2008 group match against Croatia, and the finals in that same tournament against Spain.

 

Paul's life came to an end two years later, only living to the age of two and a half. That's about the normal life span for an octopus. The Paul craze came and went in Germany, and since then, they have been searching far and wide for another match-predicting octopus. Many have gone through tests, and to no avail, the legacy of Paul would cease to exist. One day it came to an aquarium staff worker that Paul's son, Paul II, has not been tested yet for this predicting ability. One test through and Paul II had no interest in either soccer team. It wasn't until a scientist decided to place a Cologne Express logo and their current playoff opponent, the Helsinki Titans were the son of Paul had begun to work his magic.

 

Much to Germany's favor, Paul II went for Cologne to win the playoff series. The city of Cologne rejoiced once hearing of the news. Being the heavily touted underdogs in this series, the Express fans took this as the x-factor their team needs to overcome the Titans of Helsinki. Once the playoff series began, spirits were high in bars and living rooms all around Cologne.

 

 

Although as it is known now, Paul's prediction may have been far fetched. The Cologne Express currently sit two games down to Helsinki in the series. With just two more wins, the Express will be sent home and Paul II will be probably never see the light of day again. One Express player who has chosen to stay anonymous has gone on record to say "that damn octopus only made it harder for us. The fans expected so much more out of us against a really strong team. We only got more stressed over the prediction, not anymore high-spirited."

 

Can Cologne come back to save the Paul name in Germany? Team spirit has been at an all time high, national patriotism has been skyrocketing, and Express jerseys have been flying off the shelves. Perhaps the European quarter final match up prediction was right all along? The only thing Cologne would have to do is run away with four victories against Helsinki. For the Express, it will probably take more than an octopus to win this series.

 

WIN IT FOR PAUL!

[diamond_ace 3,112]

What do I have to do to bring Marcellin out of retirement and ship him to Cologne for a 4th? 

[Doomsday 4,130]

Content: 3/3 - Really creative and humorous idea for an article. Unfortunately, Cologne didn't back Paul II up at all.

 

Grammar: 2/2 - Totes magotes.

 

It wasn't until a scientist decided to place a Cologne Express logo and their current playoff opponent, the Helsinki Titans were the son of Paul had begun to work his magic. - Seems awkward

 

Appearance: 1/1 - Oh yes.

 

Overall: 6/6 - Maybe Germany will stick to tossing octopi onto the ice following goals?

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