Erikson mystery solved?

[kareykoala 62]

still writing. disregard

 

   Some recent and bizarre rumours have been circulating in the VHLM surrounding the 11th overall Dispersal pick, Andrew Erikson.

   Andrew, the young Danish rookie for the Lynx, blew out of the gates in his rookie season of the VHLM and has been matching the pace of the more distinguished players to the joy of his teammates in the Canadian capital of Ottawa. It may be a feel good story of a young boy hitting his stride late and blossoming into a game-changing player upon arrival to the league, but that fairy tale story does not happen in real life. Players do not just suddenly appear and become game breaking player in couple weeks unless the involvement of fairy godmothers and contracts signed in blood are involved, rather, the shadiness of the situation screams controversy and scandal.

   These rather unique rumours have been placing added pressure and dawning a humorous glow over the current situation as the creativity of some suggestions seem to be the result of closed areas and a room full of recently opened sharpies, whereas, other more realistic rumours, may hold the truth to where this kid came from and how his skill level has drastically increased so drastically in a span of 15 days. 

    Rumours include (in realistic to non-realistic scenarios): 

1. The use of banned substances in relation to growth hormones and anabolic steroids
2. The doctoring of his birth certificate to have it appear as if Andrew were a teenager rather than an adult, possible 24 years of age
3. Andrew Niklas being born with Aspergers syndrome, which could explain his overall obsession with hockey
4. Andrew secretly training in underground Russian bunker, honing in on some morally grey training techniques
5. Andrew Erikson being the incestuous love child of NHL stars, Pavel and Valerie Bure
6. Andrew Erikson never having been existent all along and him being a result of your imagination

   Through some recent investigative journaling and the accessing of old files, the mystery of Andrew Niklas Erikson, the innocently young and irrelevant Danish wonder child, just so happens to be solved.    

   There is nothing sketchy in his situation, to the dismay of every tabloid newspaper in the hockey sphere, Andrew has been cleared from all allegations of drugs and being the illicit love child of former NHL brothers, rather, Andrew has been under the radar on purpose as his stock was destined to be higher, but the concealing of files and tapes of his play dropped his stock in order for him to fall in the draft as he never wanted to be a star or a first round pick, rather, he wanted to earn his way to the top and a not use the high profile name of his to destine his future as a player.

 

    One could state that his mentor, Nicholas Miller of the NY Americans and his agent, Mr. Carey from eQ Hockey Management, have been tremendous amounts of support in his game on the ice and his development as a young man.

So really, there is no controversy here worth rehashing and for all intensive purposes, we can continue calling him Andrew Niklas Bure because nobody really cares about what is said here. I am just an average reporter that is broke and single and can't find a job anywhere else... so I make up crap for a living. I hate my life.

Love, Tacco Siesoning
 

Edited May 19, 2014 by redoaknebraska

[Victor 10,940]

still writing. disregard

still a mystery

[Will 4,660]

looks more like a media spot