Beardislava off to a hot start in the VHLE.

[Shindigs 1,771]

 Absurd Goaltending leads to calls for Clue Glue™ ban in the VHLE.

 

With a clickbait title like that, who could realistically stay away from the article posted on a Bratislava based blog.

 

There has been no lack of controversy in the VHLE to start off the S82 season. From last second call-ups to inanimate objects being played in key roles. It's truly been a mad start. But perhaps the biggest outrage is that Bratislava Watchmen goaltender Orion D H Chiester IX @Donno100 has been putting up truly inhuman numbers to start off the season. Leading the league in virtually every imaginable stat, while also having faced the most shots. Some attribute this hot start to the of rumors of Clue Glue™ having been applied to literally all his gear by teammate and #TeamClue ambassador Bo Johansson. Leading to several calls for the incredibly amazing and versatile product to be classified as a performance enhancing substance.

 

When asked about whether or not there was any truth to the rumors, Mr. Johansson did what any professional athlete would. He completely ignored the question and decided to just answer another question, that hadn't actually been asked. By stating "Orion's been off to one of the most insane starts to a season I've ever seen. I think it's safe to say that we would unanimously vote him as team MVP at the time being. And I'm happy you asked me who I thought had played the biggest role in our success!". This left the reporter looking somewhat perplexed. Apparently he'd hoped Bratislava hadn't gotten around to media training yet. But alas he was wrong.

 

In other Beardislava news: Possession game proves the key in latest run of victories.

 

With 12 games played, the Watchmen have put themselves in a very solid position at joint top of the VHLE leaderboards. When their AGM Anthony Pratt was asked what he felt was the key to their success, and being told that "No, he was not allowed to just point at Orion". He proceeded to wax poetic about how impressed he had been with the possession game on the ice over the last few games. Pointing out that Brian "The Payne Train" Payne @Scurvy is proving to have been a massive pickup in the recent draft, as he leads the team in positive possession/20. "Payne has been living up to his name, delivering hits like there's no tomorrow. While also bringing a smart puck on stick defensive game when applicable. As long as he can stay out of the sin bit, there's not stopping him!". After that ringing endorsement he glossed over the performances of BoJo, while putting on a different voice for some reason. Only to point out that the entire D-core has been putting up very good points.

 

He then went on to give a shoutout to both Girts Galvins @Girts and Adeline Delle Donne @Dtayl for leading the way defensively among the forwards.

"When we brough in this year's rookie class. We knew we had some offensive guns coming in. But we weren't quite ready for just how good they'd be defensively. Their dedication to playing the game the right way, on both sides of the puck. Should see them having very successful careers going forward!"

After that statement Mr.Pratt had to leave us to get back to his duties as an AGM for John Frostbeard.

 

Courtesy of our residential stat nerds Sports analysts, we have a chart of the hailed possession game of the Bratislava Watchmen. That's a lot of numbers!