Commish for a...night?

[VattghernCZ 886]

That's it. I've made it. I'm the undisputed supreme leader of the VHL. I run the show now.

 

These are my thoughts as I'm drinking my morning coffee. a medium roast Arabica from Moyobamba, Peru. Freshly ground, brewed in moka pot, with a splash of slivovice. The way I like it, apparently. Or at least that's what I'm told by my butler, because of course I have one. Why would a man in my position make his own coffee? That's ridiculous.

 

It's quite nice, actually.

 

Sipping the beverage, my mind is running on overdrive. There are three majors problems in this league I need to take care of. Problems for me, that is. Some people might view it differently. Well, sucks to be them. I'm the boss.

 

First, there's this BOG problem. I don't need anyone challenging my decisions. They are always objectively correct and in the best interest of the greater good of the VHL. Without thr BOG, wveryone will have to RESPECT. MAH. AUTHORITAH. One phonecall, and it's done. That was easier than snapping my fingers. Now the more pressing matters.

 

The Seattle Bears problem. What, you don't think they are a problem? They are a pain in the ass for the Wolves, and that's bad for the business. Obviously. But I'd have a riot to take care of if I made it obvious I want to get rid of them. Good thing the "accident" in the Key Arena happened, it's not structurally safe, the team has to move. But guess what. I've denied their relocation request, they're staying in Seattle. Real shame none of the owners of every major usable venue around is interested in renting the place. The owners are all companies linked to me, of course. But it's hard to trace. Well, looks like the Bears are going to play at a high school rink. Obviously, they won't be able to generate as much revenue for the league, so it's only fair to reduce their salary cap by half. I'll show I'm a human though, and I'll give them two weeks to become salary cap compliant. I've even bought the building company contracted to rebuild Key Arena! The current situation should give me enough time to think about how to deal with them long-term.

 

 

Problem three, there are not enough Greenland born players in this league. It's a problem, because hockey is supposed to be for everyone, yet there is no VHL, VHLE, or VHLM team in Greenland. In other places a neither, sure, but we have to start somewhere. Starting next season, there will be a VHLM team in Greenland. We're gonna relocate...let me randomly choose...San Diego Marlins! Behold, Nuuk Narwhals. To show my commitment to expanding hockey in Greenland, every Greenland born player will receive a $6M bonus to spend in the player store every season. They will also...

 

...no...

 

What? Where am I? Why is my alarm clock ringing? Please tell me it wasn't just a dream.

 

"Mr. Barnaby?" I shout out to my butler. Nothing. Of course. F*ck my life, seriously, I'm thinking think as I'm getting out of bed and going to make a cup of crappy instant coffee.

Edited July 6, 2023 by VattghernCZ
jk Bears, I love you