Claimed: Augustus Gloop: Biography [1/2]

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Augustus Gloop: Biography

 

Augustus was brought into this world weighing in at an incredible 13 pounds. The doctor told his parents, Olga and Harry, that they were in for a big baby but the moment it came out, they knew exactly what they were in for. Aside from the large size of the child, he had orange hair that would put the old, red fox to shame. His face was pudgy, round and full of freckles and his body followed similar suit. If we had to be honest, Augustus wasn't that attractive of a baby (and that's being nice). Along with his unattractiveness, was his evil, smug and spoiled personality. Even as a baby growing into a young tot, he seemed to think the world revolved around him. He was only fed the bad food - the high in sugar, low in anything good at all, kind of food. If you tried putting anything at the end of his high chair table, he scowled, cried and made a fuss. Due to this, his continued to grow in size. It seemed as though he was putting on more weight than he was days to his age. He grew and grew, busting out of pants, looking like a gap model in shirts and having feet 2 sizes too big for his little, tiny shoes. This was a problem for his parents, sure, but they would do anything for the son they loved.  You see, one parents (Harry) worked as a noble, respected lawyer down at the courthouse and his mother was head of the nursing department at the local hospital. While they were';t filthy rich like one person in town, they surely had enough money in their pockets.

 

As Augustus grew up, so did his personalities. Rather though, they did not grow up but instead intensified. The thought and idea that he was privileged only continued to grow. His desire and need to get whatever he wanted only got worse as his parents gave into every cry, command or want. Whatever he wants, young Augustus got. His parents were creating a little monster and they didn't even know about it. He would kick and scream, yell and shout - he was the worst of the little monsters. One Christmas morning, he woke up to only find 5 things in his stocking and 11 presents wrapped organized under neath their 12 foot ceiling tree. Not even there crack of dawn yet and he's in his parents bedrooms putting a piss on. He's throwing pillows, shouting naughty words and giving his parents his worst. They gave into him and later in the day he was opening another 3 gifts that they had to go out and buy. Now, it wasn't until the age of 11 that things started to get real serious for the Gloop family. Along with his spoiled traits and poor allowances, he also had some bad habits. One of those were eating. Eating chocolate to be specific. Everyday his father would give him $3 in the morning time to walk to the store to buy a "Wonka" chocolate bar. Every evening when his mom returned home from work, should would do the same - not knowing her husband had given him some earlier. One day, little Augustus came running home from the store, shouting to his father that he needed to get the golden ticket in one of the winning Wonka bars. If you hadn't forgotten, he gets everything. Both parents gave him $50 and said "Go down to the local store and buy all that they have". 36 chocolate bars later, he made his way home and upstairs to his room. He made the superstition that if he didn't eat every bar, he would jinx his chances at finding the winning ticket. So he ate one, then two, three, four and so on. Finally, 15 chocolate bars and a stomach ache later, he bit into something rather unusual and hard. It was the ticket. "You have won!" the tikcet read with other information on it.

 

Skip forward 2 months, 16 days and 11 hours and Augustus was finally walking up to the tall, purple gates of the Willy Wonka's chocolate factory. With every step he took, his heart raced quicker and quicker. The closer he got, the stronger his senses could pick up the smell of sweet, sugary chocolate. They knock on the doors and they went in. It was like nothing else in the entire world. Chocolate rivers, flowers, animals and waterfalls. There was candy this, soda that and chocolate everywhere. It was a candy/chocolate Utopia. He quickly fell in love, which led to anger and jealousy. He started hiding all the chocolate in his pockets, or in his mothers bag. She, of course, said nothing. He made a fuss, started eating everything in site. He tasted rainbow gum drops, sour swizzlers and taste chocolate oranges. He ate and ate, sweating incredibly for a little boy. Then, he passed out. 3 hours later he woke up in a hospital with a doctor, 2 nurses and his parents by the bad. The doctor told Augustus about poor life choices and one of them was eating bad. How eating these things could make them side or have him lead a short or difficult life. chocolate was a good thing, but only in moderation.  The doctor told him to become more healthy and make changes.

 

So he did. He joined the local hockey team in town and made it passed try outs. Dusselheim Wonka Attack is what they called the team and Augustus played on the 2nd line with Charlie (the poor kid) and one of Wonka's nephews. While following the doctors advise of trying to live a healthier lifestyle, he only did so in the form that he did more. He worked out, started playing hockey and actually became good at it. This could be credited due to the fact he never once slowed down on eating chocolate and ever since has been fine. His larger frame allows him to move through his opponents easier and doesn't let them strip him of the puck. He's still a spoiled ass and you can see it on the ice too. At the end of every game, he has a personal butler come into the locker room and feed him sweets, chocolates and red bulls. Somethings change, somethings don't. Let's just say it would be a surprise if his new team in the SHL had to switch their sponsors from RBK and Nike to Hershey's and M&M's. 

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Review:

*insert Augustus Gloop's song here* Jokes aside, this is a really good and accurate Bio for Augustus, and it works really well with the plot of the book/movie. I'm kinda hoping the sponsors do change to those candy companies, and this is so well written, I think it could be what happened.