Orion Slade Rookie Profile [1/2]

[BluObieZ 1,125]

Note: This will be claimed in 4 seasons when I create him. @Beketov said I can post these and claim them later. 

Orion Slade

Center

Height: 6’6”

Weight: 225lbs

Nationality: Australian/American

 

Hello mate! Well… not really mate but person reading. If you are confused by this I don’t blame you. Orion is still many seasons away from being drafted. But he is my last player ever so the hype starts now.

 

Not much is known about Orion at this moment. His style is a thing of legend much like his name. He lights the lamp more than Zeus throws thunder. If you think this guy is going to be a pushover you are sadly mistaken. This guy is legit and he is coming to feast on your D and goalie. You will quake in your skates, you will write a letter to your mommy saying you aint never coming home. He will bury you in ice and laugh while doing so. He will break your ankles with one little deke and tell you “I’ll be right back” then score a goal.  He’d help you up just to knock you back down and skate away laughing. Why? Because he’s an ass and he loves it.

 

  Strengths

 

Scoring: Dude is a legit beast with the puck. If you think you figured him out he will just change it up and do something different. He knows all your flaws, even the ones you don’t even know you have. He can dissect a goalie with his shot. Sometimes the puck appears to change direction after it leaves his stick. Almost like the knuckle puck. Almost like he is using superhuman powers to find the back of the net.

 

Passing: If you think his shot amazing, wait till you see his passing. Dude can thread the needle. He will make you look straight up stupid with his passing. If you think you have the passing lane covered, you don’t not with him. He will find a way and get the puck to the wide open man for the easy goal. His passing will be the source of your nightmares.

 

Skating: Remember how I said he will break your ankles? I was not kidding. This kid can fly. 0-100 faster than a Tesla Model 3. His speed just complements his scoring touch and passing. Think Nathan Mackinnon but times two. If I were you I’d invest in Vibranium enforced skates for all you glass ankle players.

 

Weakness

 

Leadership/Loyalty: If you think you can build around him, you can but if you think that he will lead your team by talking to players when they are down you are looking at the wrong guy. Dude legit only thinks about himself. He is not loyal, he will leave your team at the drop of a hat. Unless you want him to lead a mass exodus you are pretty much screwed.

 

Defense: Sure this dude is built like a fucking god, but he does not play defense. He actually is known for standing at center ice waiting for passes out of the defensive zone. So if you are looking for a player that only plays one half of the ice then this is your man.

 

Ego: Probably the one thing everyone was expecting. Every Robbie client has one. Hell it’s part of his search process. He only takes on the biggest egos in the world. This Orion kid might just take the cake on the ego scale. Dude legit claims that he is a god, and if you disagree with him… well may god… he have mercy on your shitty little soul.

 

 

[DollarAndADream 3,356]

Review:

Solid weaknesses! Haha. I think probably some people around the VHL wouldn't be surprised.

Good shit though. Approved!