Mikka Pajari Talks [1/2]

[Devise 4,475]

For the first time on what probably feels like countless eons, the VHL's resident VHLM scrub mcscrub has finally decided to open his mouth. Instead of getting questions from reporters, Mikka Pajari has decided to simply appear in front of a nondescript podium and give an address.

 

Mikka: Hi. I'm Mikka Pajari. You probably knew that. Or maybe you didn't, listen I'm not really good at this public engagement thing. Anyways, I'm so happy to be a member of the Ottawa Lynx, I think we have a fantastic team and....

 

Mikka gets interrupted as a literal faceless putty in generic VHL gear approaches him and whispers into his ear.

 

Mikka: Oh sorry, I mean the Oslo Storm. I'm sure that controversy will cause a storm. Pun! Anyways, I don't know how I feel about my career thus far because it's felt very silent to me. I've been around, I guess, sort of. Lurking on the ice, passing the puck or something to that effect. I've got points! At least that is what they tell me. However I'm here to say that I'm finally ready to give up the sauce! That is right, Storm fans....what if I were to tell you that your going to meet SOBER Mikka Pajari? I can't wait to hear the applause from my fans. I'm sure they'll be in the streets with signs and parades and the whole ten yards. 

 

Mikka pauses, leaves the podium....leaving the caterers and 2 reporters who decided to show up even though they can't ask questions so there is really no need for them in awkward silence. One of the reporters gets up, grabs a donut and leaves, presuming the thing is over. The other sits there patiently, wondering. The caters are done setting up and Pajari walks back onto the stage.

 

Mikka: I also want to talk a bit about my stats for Season 63 or whatever it is we are on by now. I'm a -11 presently, someone told me that on the street before handing me a charbroiled onion. As I ate the onion I wondered to myself, what is the meaning of the 11? I had to know the answer, and after storming, get it? Storming? The VHL headquarters I totally got my answer. It's the VHL's 11th Birthday. The league has been around long enough to hit puberty. So I figured now that the league has had it's first wet dream, it's time for my wet dream of becoming a VHL superstar to get back on track. Which is why I'm ready to announce my full time return to you know, caring or whatever it is people do to get out of the minors and not be a scrub. So cheers, hooray for me. To my fans, I say...go get some beers go get whatever celebrate. Because the Washington Capitals are the Stanley Cup Champions! I know that has nothing to do with me, but I figured I'd let my fans indulge in what I've been indulging in for the past few months. 

 

Mikka acts like he's about to leave but then rushes over to the podium one last time.

 

Mikka: Oh and before I forget....or run out of breath or ability to communicate or whatever. GO VASTERAS GO! 

 

With that Mikka runs off the podium, through the catering destroying it and out of the building. The one reporter left in the room scratches is head, jots down a few notes before getting up and leaving. 

 

The end. 

[DollarAndADream 3,357]

Review:

Glad that you're back again. It's nice to see a familiar face back around. Pajari should be a steal if you keep improving.