Ode to Houston [1/2]

[Kuch9 22]

Boy has this previous season been fun. It all started with a trade that sent Kozlov from Halifax to Houston because he wanted to win a championship, oh how ironic that was. It may not have ended the way Kozlov would have wanted it to end, but it was still a great season. In this article Kozlov will recollect some of his great moments in Houston, his stats and where he goes from here.

* (This article has been translated from Russian for your convince)*

I first arrived in Houston after s64, I had just been drafted into the VHL and got traded by my former VHL team, Halifax. The first thing I wanted to do was go celebrate getting drafted but had no one to party with since I was the only player on Houston at the time. When the draft happened, I was excited to see Callum MacElroy was selected by GM Sonnet. I felt like he would be one of the few people in the league who would be able to drink with me. Oh boy was I wrong, he is a light weight. Since he is Irish or something like that, he would only drink Guinness, which was very disappointing. The first night we got together as a team we went to a local bar in downtown Houston to celebrate the new team. A few people pussied out, not going to call out names *Jack Lynch*, but it was a great night. I don’t think most of the other players remember that night since they were all light weights, but Rhys went to go stroke that strangers’ beard, we could not stop laughing. Our drinking only got worse as the season went on.  Me and MacElroy were able to find a way to put vodka, Guinness for him, in our water bottles. I wish I could say how we did it, but I want it to be a surprise for my VHL GM and coach. Road trips were great, me and my new pal Mac were roomies all season. I wouldn’t change anything about our time together except for the fact that he snores like train. Keep in mind I sleep with a bear back home, but this man snores loud as hell. If you are reading this Mac please go, see a doctor about that. As our season winded down we actually started to focus on hockey. So, to prepare ourselves for playoff time we went boating in the Gulf of Mexico. There is no better prep then to boat down to Mexico to drink. I would like to thank Sonnet for sponsoring that trip.  The playoffs didn’t go the way we wanted, losing to Halifax in 7, the team I left because the Halifax GM and I didn’t think they would be competitive this season. But at the end of the day Houston was fun but going back to Europe next season will be even better, I get to be closer to bear. So, to my teammates if you are in the VHL next season keep your head up, I am no longer there to protect you.

This season statistically did not go the way I wanted it to. How do I never lead the league in hits, I start every year with the goal to get 300 hits a year but never seem to hit it.  Otherwise I made some strides that I think quik is going to like. My point production was much better in year two, I still throw the body around like its nothing, and my passing was on point this year. Before next year starts, I would like to work on faceoffs, and keep working on my pass. I may never be a 30-goal man but if I can get 60 assists a year, I might be a good player. The goals for next year are to once again reach 300 hits, have less than 130 penalty minutes, and to have 20 goals with 50 assists. The main goal is to bring a championship back to Putin and Russia.

Now that the year is done, I finally get to go back to Russia to see bear and family. I get to train in the state-of-the-art soviet, I mean team Russia, training center. And will get my part time job at the Moscow zoo back, working with the bears of course. I may not have won a championship, but the bears make me feel like a champion. Over my second off season I hope to catch up with some old teammates while getting to know my new ones in Helsinki. I look forward to seeing who there will drink with me, and where the best places to drink are. With this move back to Europe I have to find a new apartment in Finland, and one that will let me have a pet. All of that being said I am super glad I get to move back to Europe to continue my dream of chasing my goal of winning a VHL championship. Lets go Helsinki.

[Renomitsu 934]

Review - Some paragraphs that are a bit long for my taste, but I loved your narrative style and content of your anecdotes. Internally, I definitely read this story with a stereotypical Russian accent (not sure if that's a good or bad thing hah), and there's something to the cadence of your writing that makes it believable. I hope Mac has his sleeping checked out.