VattghernCZ

Well that explains the amount of shots blocked, he actually wants to get out of the way to not hurt his fragile old bones, but is too slow to do so

Thanks! The bulk of work I do in GIMP. Some things are easier for me to do in PhotoFiltre (assembling pictures, and fading/gradients - I'm sure this can be done in GIMP as well, I just have no idea how 'cause I'm mostly figuring out stuff as I go lol) and I use Fotor for some touches (like the metal texture in the upper text - it's just plain gold color with metal texture applied to it in Fotor, and the text cut out from it in GIMP; it also have some "scene" effects - pretty much bundles of color adjustments, I use one of these on pretty much every graphic I make as a final touch; it also have some good looking borders, like in the card I have as a sig)

*laughs in more goals, assists and hits than Bouchard in fewer games* Gotta give my teammates chance to score as well, you know

Kerr finally remembered he's allowed to score goals, wow, thanks Simon!

1. I think it would be okay to use chatGPT or something as a research tool to summarize something for you, which then you could use as a source of information to write your own tasks, but not presenting the AI text itself as a PT. 2. As long as it's not something that's claimed as graphics, I'm 100% okay with it - like a graphic thingy for an article or a media spot, or graphics for press conference, or for a player sig that's not claimed, or for web design etc. 3. Well, I've pretty much answered that. As long as the result itself isn't claimed, it's fair game to use anywhere in my opinion. 4. I've only seen one, not sure which member it was or what the punishment was, but I remember my reaction was hm, that's fair. 5. Not really, I've only done some stuff with image geerators just for the laughs to share in the LR, like I remember I did a pack of cartoon wolves playing hockey. Overall, I really like AI tools and use them quite a bit for personal use. 6. This feels too serious for a sim game haha. I definitely think there is potential for it, and I wouldn't mind with the condition that everything AI generated has to be labeled as such. In art, it's kinda fascinating to watch AI do art, but it should specifically be called "AI art" - or shorten it as airt? With journalism, I'd prefer it to human based journalism as long as it's just raw data and facts fed to the algorithm, which then simplifies it for a lay person, without any agendas. But I'm somewhat sure that wouldn't mostly be the case.

1. A bit too slow of a start for my liking. But it's still fairly early in the season, we're still finsing our groove. 2. We had depth scoring issues early on. The guys really stepped up during the week tho, and it looks like it's the top guys struggling to score now. 3. It's mostly Jesse Teno's heroics, they've been probably the best goalie in the league once again. 4. They're a bit under half a point per game throughout their career, including the early years of development, yea, I think there's a good chance they do. 5. I think we can keep at around where it is, we've got Teno, defensively strong blue line and some forwards with elite two way game. I see no reason why it should go up. 6. I'm not a big goalie guy, I don't follow the stats too much, but it sounds like that would be a historic season. I have them as my Clegane prediction, but I wouldn't bet on sub-2 GAA too much.

Zlatá hokejka – or The Golden Stick in english – is a prestigeous award awarded annually to the best Czech (or Czechoslovak, pre-1993) hockey player of the year. Former winners of this award are among others Jaromír Jágr (12 times from 1995 to 2016), David Pastrňák (6 times from 2017 to 2023) or Dominik Hašek (5 times from 1987 to 1998). Ever since David Pastrňák truely broke out as a superstar in the NHL in 2016/17 season by scoring 34 goals and 70 points in 75 games with the Boston Bruins, and has been on the roll ever since, missing the award only once in 2022, when Ondřej Palát of the Tampa Bay Lightning (NHL) claimed it. 2022 and 2023 were the first two years since 2011 whern there was at least one non-NHL player among the three finalists – Roman Červenka of the SC Rapperswil-Jona Lakers (NLA) in 2022, and Wann Kerr of the London United, who ended up one of the finalists together with Pastrňák and Martin Nečas (Carolina Hurricanes, NHL). And Kerr definitely made his case, with scoring 38, 41 and 44 goals, and 84, 89 and 96 points just in the last three seasons alone. Are these stats even comparable with Pastrňák, who's only good for a fraction of games played and for points Kerr can put up in a year? I think Kerr got FISTED ANALLY BY A CIRCUS MONKEY, and the only reason Pastrňák keeps winning it is that NHL is everyone's favorite league, and the world still doesn't pay any attention to the VHL.

1. Well it's too late to the party, but I swear I don't remember who scored it. Let's pretend the season hasn't started yet - it's gonna be Molly, they will lead the team in goals, they will score the first one to let everyone know. 2. What's a realistic number? I'll just make up a number - make it 17! No idea why, 3. We have a lot of strong, two-way players who can make anyone between pipes look good, I'd say 0.905-0.91 SV% and around 2.5 GAA, 4. Yes, definitely, we have elite offense and goaltender! We're just too strong not to make it. If we don't, Simon probably found the good stuff again. 5. My boy Torbjorn, he's massive! He'll just power through everybody and puts the puck through the net. 6. Now that's hard to predict, but he's already won the Cup as a GM, I believe he knows what's needed to make another push, 8.7/10!

January 1, 2024 London United training camp begins. Wann Kerr arrives among the last players, understandably slightly hungover after the New Year celebration, but otherwise looks like everything is okay with him. He put up solid performance, looking ready for the upcoming season. Around 6:30 p.m. UTC, he leaves the London United training facility alone in a rented car. January 2, 2024 – January 5, 2024 The same pattern repeats, Wann Kerr works his behind off with the team, but seems rather quiet. He leaves alone in a rented car. January 6, 2024 Wann Kerr doesn't arrive at the training camp. Not showing up for a single day of the camp is a slight contract violation, but not a cause for concern. January 7, 2024 Wann Kerr doesn't show up again. The team management calls him, his phone is off and he's not available on any social media. Him wife is notified, but she's not able to reach him either. London police is notified and tasked with a welfare check. Kerr's rented car is parked by his apartment building, but no one responds to the knocking on Kerr's rented apartment door. After the landlord opened the door for the police, they found out the apartment is empty and there are signs of struggle. A city-wide search for Kerr is commenced. January 8, 2024 Hockey fans from the whole country swarm London to help to look for their team's missing top center. Every hotel in the city is at full capacity and restaurants are reporting 316% increase of profits on average. January 9, 2024 Pre-season press conference is held without Kerr. Eventually questions about Kerr had to be banned for the sake of getting somewhere. January 10, 2024 Two hours before the season opener, a white van stops by United Arena and offloads a human sized package. A janitor opens it to find Kerr inside. Kerr thanks him, pays him 5 pounds and a perfectly softboiled egg, and goes to the United locker room to get ready for the game. Now what happened with Kerr? Was he kidnapped by his VHLM captain Juan Ceson again to be replaced by a bot? As it turned out, not really. It was a retaliation for the pineapple pizza incident in Rome, where Kerr ordered a pineapple pizza, got almost assaulted by the chef and booed from the ice by the Gladiators fans later that day. In Kerr's testimony, he said: „You know that famous chef who hates pineapple pizza? I think he's called Ramdon Gorsay. I was boiling some hot dogs for dinner, he busted through my door, called me a f##king donkey and an idiot sandwich, said my hot dogs are f##king raw and beat me up. Have you seen the guy? He's massive! He took me to a sort of a warehouse building with fully equiped kitchen, and I wasn't allowed to leave until I was able to de-bone whole chicken while blindfolded, perfectly fillet king salmon and cook egg 42 ways, all while berating me for liking pineapple pizza the whole time. He's relentless!“ When asked if he had got any warning before the incident, Kerr said: „I was finding weird stuff in my mailbox for a few days before the incident. Like a can of pineapple stabbed with a kitchen knife. I thought it's just a weird prank or something, I don't know...“ London fans and Kerr's teammates certainly hope the mental trauma won't affect his on-ice performance too much as the United are once again expected to be one of the strongest European teams in the league,

I was today years old when I figured out Callum Gary Yannick is a reference to Calgary. Hey, I've never said I'm the sharpest tool in the shed, apparently I'm just a tool!

Hello and welcome to the VHL! Feel free to reach out with any questions or concerns!

It's fun seeing this thread pop up every now and then. Scurvy's new player inspired me to read some Abercrombie, I only read The Blade Itself back at middle school, but remembered Ninefingers 'cause he's a badass. I read it again, continued with Before They Are Hanged (then read three unrelated short books by Miroslav Žemlička) and now I'm getting close to finishing Last Argument of Kings. It's fun

Oh good, so this post is not a trade block update

Am I getting traded now? Thanks for the trust, hope I can help to lead the team further than we got last season

1. Nah, he doesn't believe in it. I was also told he ridicules people for having resolutions, but I can't confirm that. However, I know he's big enough of a dickhead for it to be true. 2. Hopefully he will step up in the postseason. He was garbage in S91 playoffs. 3. Being the physical presence on his line. It's a part of his game at this point. 4. Leonard Triller, your passes are copypasta-worthy. Seriously, we need to come up with one. 5. After a few years I'll finally go to Brutal Assault again, it's one of the biggest European "extreme" metal fests. 6. My VHL teams being eliminated from the playoffs!

At least I'm self aware lol

New year, new me, blah blah blah, as if Wann Kerr was about to change his antics anytime soon. He was a shitpost when I created him in at the end of July 2022 as my first gen player to see what this game is about, without necessarily taking it seriously. And he remains a shitpost to this day. No way I would have imagined Wanker getting drafted 9th overall, or somehow growing to 1349 TPE at the moment (btw, 1349 is a great Norwegian band, what a coincidence). Well, thank you Shindigs for lighting the fire under Wanker's ass, still miss ya buddy. Due to my lack of crerativity, I've already written about Wanker's humble accomplishments too many times. So how about looking at what's to come now that the last number of the date changes, and somehow people make a big deal out of it? Well, there are only three seasons left in his career. The first one is set to take place with the United. What would I like to see? We still have elite offense and one of the best goaltenders in the league, we've got as good of a shot at the cup as anyone. Individually, cracking 100 points would be nice, especially after scoring 96 last season and coming back with exactly the same build after handling depreciation. S93? Well, I don't even know what team will Wanker play for. Will the United decide they want an extra year of the Wanker experience? No matter what team it is, I want Wanker to play for a team seriously competing. And for S94? Honestly, I'll probably care more about the storyline. Kerr moving to London? Returning to Vancouver? Joining Seattle, the Wolves' rivals like a true wanker? Or spending the last season in his home country with the Phantoms? All sound great. Of course, midway through the 2024, I'll have to say goodbye to this shitpost. The league will certainly be a better place then. What's next? Well, I was thinking about another shitpost, maybe Abel Lend? Or maybe use Czech to create shitpost names, like a Japanese star Masemeno Nasaku (he's got semen on his jacket)? These were all possibilities before I've sold my soul to Greenland. The league ain't ready for Alagsantere, the first of the Grønvolds.

Wann Kerr's first season in London was undoubtedly a success, as the Czech center went on to set new career highs in goals (44), assists (52), points (96), shots (452), shots blocked (37), game winning goals (10), powerplay goals (11) and recorded his first ever shorthanded goal. Regularly being deployed as the top line center, his play helped his linemates Leonard Triller and Molly the Cat to take their play to another level and have career best seasons. The United finished the season with 44-19-9 record for third spot in the bloodbath that was the European Conference, and managed to advance past Riga Reign to the second round of the playoffs where they fell short in the series against Helsinki Titans. As Kerr is spending his offseason in Vancouver with his family, he agreed to spend a few minutes of his time chatting with the Hokej Magazín reporters via a videocall. A big season for you and your team. What was the biggest difference between playing in Vancouver and playing in London? First of all, it's nice to hear Czech a bit more often, some Czech fans show up at the games every now and then, it's something that never happened in Canada. It's just cool to hear some Czech chants. But seriously, I think I'm more focused on the game here. My family is in Vancouver and I don't carry the responsibility of being one of the team's leaders, so I tend to keep to myself a bit more, working hard and doing what I can to help my team on the ice. I don't mean to sound like „all game and no play“ here (laughs), but I feel like there's overall a bit more serious mood. It looks like the focus on the game pays off. You with Triller and Cat were one of the most dominants lines in the league, what was your secret? I've played with some fantastic players on every level, obviously with forwards like Henry Eagles, Nico Pearce, Sergey Preobrazhensky or Nezuko in Vancouver. Lenny and Molly have played with each other for quite some time, their chemistry is mind-blowing, it was obvious all I need to do is to get them the puck by any means necessary, and create space for them. We're all different players, but I think our play complement each other really well. I don't think I've ever felt as comfortable with my linemates as I do now. I believe you're looking forward to next season, hopefully to reunite this line. What are you working on this offseason to bring to the table? Mostly on licking my wounds and be ready to get back being at least as good as I was last season. It's getting harder, I'm no spring chicken anymore. I'm spending most of my time staying mobile and in shape, I haven't really been able to find time to work on new skills and habits so far. I can imagine you're pretty banged up from the postseason. The Titans unfortunately got the better of you, and one of the storylines was you facing Pierre Emile Bouchard, your former captain. How was the experience? Yea...the playoffs. It was bad, I really didn't help my team at all. Even more motivation for me to work harder next season. With Bouchy, obviously there was some comraderie, but I don't think we let our off ice relationship show on the ice. He definitely didn't hold back on me (laughs), he got me pretty good a few times. One of my fingers is chipped, I believe it's from Bouchy's shot I blocked awkwardly. I can't wait for him to hang his skates, I don't want to play against him again! (laughs) At the beginning, you said it's great to meet Czech fans more often now that you play in Europe and I've heard you're involved in a development program for young Czech players, do you keep in touch with the youngsters? Yea, I've been donating a part of my paycheck to the Czech Ice Hockey Association for a few seasons now. I actually visited a few peewee teams' practices right after our postseason, before I traveled back to Canada. I don't wat to sound cocky, but Left Alone and I are probably the biggest Czech names currently in the VHL, it's so wholesome seeing the little hockey players' faces sorta starstruck when you're on the ice with them. It's great to see the future generations of hockey players are in good hands, I swear we need it. It's been way too long since our country earned a major success in international hockey. Perhaps your future after you call it quits as a player is in player development? Anyway, we're running out of time, thank you for the quick chat and see you next time! (laughs) No, I'm terrible with people no matter their age, my future is with reptiles. If I continue my hockey career after I hang the skates, I'll probably coach Jarda Jágr or something (laughs). Sure bud, my pleasure as always, take care!

1. With our core, I'd be disappointed if we don't make the playoffs. I think we shouldn't expect less. 2. No reason why we couldn't challenge for the division lead. But let's be safe and say second. 3. I think it's a coin flip between Jesse Teno in the net and our top end scoring, if we put together the Triller-Kerr-Molly line once again. 4. Our blue line is a big question mark as of now. Presumably the current defensive core isn't what we're going with, but we'll see. 5. Vancouver is even deeper in their rebuild than they were last season, after trading away another captain, I think we can sweep the series against them. 6. Seeing as our defense is a question mark, the Prague offense looks especially scary...

A for Adios, C for Cya