Houston, you have a problem

[jRuutu 2,464]

 

And that problem is Yukon Rush. We followed your series against Halifax, good stuff. You did a great job in kicking the slight favorite of the series out of the competition, but do you really think you can take us? The Yukon Rush? The best team of the regular season. The team that scored the most goals. No, that would be foolish. It would also be foolish from our end to expect an easy series. We know better. We are not sailors who rely on favorable winds.

 

Why you are not going to win?

 

1. You are not Yukon Rush. The only team that can beat Yukon Rush is Yukon Rush. We practice night and day, all we do is play hockey. We are like a machine that never sleeps. The Yukon machine never breaks. Yukon machine never runs out of fuel.

 

2. The spirits are on our side.

 

Papa Emeritus is a deeply spiritual person. He says that the spirits visit him, sometimes even during games to give him tips. Others in the team have claimed that they have also been visited by spirits, but so far only Papa is believable. The spirits seem to visit him frequently. Some nights he looks almost possessed. The way he gets in front of the puck is demonic. After each shutout Papa thanks the spirits by performing a ritual in the middle of the locker room. I can't say for sure what happens during the ritual as we are not allowed in, but I could swear I heard ''Out of Touch by Hall and Oates'' once. What does it mean? I don't know, but we don't dare to ask too many questions. The spirits are on our side.

3. Depth.

 

So far in the five games we have played in the playoffs, 14 players have at least two points. That is excellent depth. On top of that, players like Jerome Reinhart are still with 0 goals. Jerome scored over 40 during the regular season. His brother Tyler gives him a hard time about still having 0 goals, so you can imagine how eager Jerome is to silence Tyler.

 

Someone can speculate whether the team spirit is a problem if players roast each other, but what you forget is that the Reinhart's are evil or good. We can't remember which one it is. What we do know is that they are not normal people like us. The Reinharts scored over 100 goals during the regular season, but neither wants to celebrate after they score. They just skate to the bench and say: ''Scoring bores me'' or ''Uuu, Gatorade, I like this''.

 

4. Your fans are not Yukon Rush fans.

 

We have the best fans. They like us and dislike you. The series starts on our home ice. We were the best home team during the regular season, we won 31 home games. Do you reckon you can just come in and leave with even one win? Naah. We are going to take both wins and come visit your home arena. After we leave, we have two home arenas. The fans will follow us there and support us. Your cattle ranchers will come second when Yukon Rushers start to scream and yell.

 

[JardyB10 4,865]

Joke’s on you, you’re playing San Diego now

[Beketov 9,025]

3 minutes ago, JardyB10 said:

Joke’s on you, you’re playing San Diego now

Tbh we were always supposed to be.

[JardyB10 4,865]

2 minutes ago, Beketov said:

Tbh we were always supposed to be.

Yeah well SOME OF US just trust the posted schedule instead of literal RIGGERY!

[Beketov 9,025]

26 minutes ago, JardyB10 said:

Yeah well SOME OF US just trust the posted schedule instead of literal RIGGERY!

Complaining about riggery, smh. You’ve changed bro.