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Claimed:Stabby McFullO'Schmidt Gets Lost in Canada; Winds Up in Saskatoon [Final 5/6]


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Swimming in Regina 

 

Written by Stabby McFullO'Schmidt

 

I have gotten a lot of questions about where I am right now. What my goals are. Where I see myself going. It is a question that I've lost sight of myself. The only answer I have found in all of this mess is that the more things change, the more they stay the same. 

 

Brain injuries are a terrible, terrible thing. After losing a season on the ice due to a coma, I found myself again in serious trouble when I dived headfirst into a shallow lake when celebrating Canada Day in Regina. Granted, the two are completely unrelated, but it sucks that these terrible things always happen to Stabby! The only answer I have found in all of this mess is that when life hits you hard, it hits you fast. 

 

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I still cannot point to Brampton on a map. Now I play for Saskatoon. Where is Saskatoon? Maps are confusing, confusing things. Which way do I turn this thing? How big could Canada be? The only answer I have found in all of this mess is that an atlas can only get you so far. 

Do you know that 7-11 now serves hot dogs wrapped in bacon? That's the most badass thing I have ever heard of! It's so great to live in a world where I can put bacon on whatever I want. Do you think cavemen ever ate bacon? Hell no, they ate rocks or some shit. The only answer I have found in all of this mess is that if you are not going to go big, then why did you leave home in the first place? 

 

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Mirrors are tricky, huh? The only answer I have found in all of this mess is that when you stare into a reflection, sometimes it stares back into you. 

 

I play ice hockey. Ice hockey is fun because you get to skate around rinks and hit passersby. I like to play ice hockey because I like to hit people, but mostly because I do not like other people hitting me. Coincidence? I think not. The only answer I have found in all of this mess is that sometimes, your biggest enemy is yourself.

 

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So hockey ice season start soon? Where do I play? When will Calgary call up Stabby? I score a lot of goals and I block many shots. I can't wait to score the touchdowns. Stabby is ready for ice time again.

 

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Edited by John Scott

Content: 2/3 A little on the shorter side here. Try to get the word count up closer to 500 if you want to get full marks. I want a bacon wrapped hot dog.

Grammar: 2/2 Only one thing really that I noticed

Presentation: 1/1

 

Grade: 5/6

 

badass - bad ass

Edited by FV Till I Die

Content 2/3 - That was an incredible read that was completely unexpected, but as DT pointed out, it's a little on the shorter side. You should at least make sure to hit the 450 requirement, and more preferably 500 with your media spots. You have a knack for interesting reads though, so I look forward to more!

 

Grammar 2/2 - DT caught the one thing I might've called.

 

Appearance 1/1 - Bryzie on drugs makes this a easy point.

 

Final 5/6

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