Sunderbruch's Recollection of his first season

[NickSunderbruch 392]

     So for a long time I've wanted to play professional hockey, I had a hard time starting out though. I grew up in Florida, not really the first place that comes to mind when you think hockey. But I had a dream and I wasn't going to let that dream die, I played my hardest and when I moved to Flint Michigan, I had my chance. I played my heart out in high school, I won a couple trophies and scouts came. I didn't enter into the VHLM through the draft, instead I came in as a free agent. Two teams reached out to me, Mississauga, and Las Vegas. Mississauga approached me and told me that I would get top 6 minutes, because they were rebuilding and essentially not contending this year. I understood that mind set, but tanking has never been an option to me, I play to win. When Vegas reached out to me I was told we would be a competitive team. I weighed my options, and Vegas was who I went to. And honestly, I don't regret it. The Ace's took a chance on me, you'd have to ask Spartan if that chance paid off. But I also took a chance on Vegas, and I think it absolutely paid off. Spartan and Twist really made me feel welcome in that locker room. My teammates became family, and I saw many other players come in after me blossom and play incredible, I remember when I told Sandstorm that my goal was to go first overall in the draft, they told me that they'd do anything to make that happen. While I'm absolutely not going to be a first overall pick, I'm absolutely thrilled to have played with someone so amazing.

 

     When I look back at this season, I see one full of blood, sweat, tears, laughter, celebration, and comradery. I loved playing for Vegas, I loved playing with these teammates. I remember my first goal, it came after a frustrating time where I was unable to score or get any points for a while. I didn't show it, but I was angry with myself, I saw my team losing a few games by only one goal and thought to myself, "if I had buried that shot earlier we'd have won". I was in head all the time, and hit many posts until I finally got my first goal. The pure joy I felt was so indescribable, I was on top of the world. I may have started off slow this season, but in 70 games I put up 40 points. It's not a point per game but it was still a good rookie season, and no one will convince me otherwise. I watched Sandstorm, Tamm, and Ryhnex, and I learned from them, I continued in their footsteps and once I started to I started to score more, I learned from them, and I hope that someday a rookie might say the same about me. The pure leadership that first line had this year was astounding, they stepped up and lead us to the playoffs and I couldn't be more proud of my team. I couldn't be more proud of myself for even slightly helping to achieve that. We may have been knocked out in the first round, but we took them to 6 games and they're currently in the finals as I write this. Speaking of playoffs I was astounded that I was able to put up 7 points in 6 playoff games, I couldn't have done any of what I have this season without my coaching staff, and teammates. 

 

     So yeah, this year had a lot of ups and downs, but I wouldn't change any of what happened to me this year. Because I improved, I went from 1 points in 7 games, to 40 in 70. I don't think I would have improved as much as I have on any other team. I could keep going on and on about why this season was the best few months of my life, but I don't need to. You get the point, and we can start wrapping this up. If any of you rookies get drafted to Vegas, here's my advice; listen to Spartan, he knows how to help you grow and he's a genuine person, you'll love him. Anyways thank you all for letting me get all sentimental on you. Tune in next week for my reaction to my draft. 

 

744 words :3

[ahockeyguy 110]

Review: I love getting "into the players' heads," so to speak. So to see you writing that way about the one-goal games was awesome. There were a couple of grammatical things (mainly a misspelling), but that seems like nitpicking. The paragraphs are spaced nicely and the sentences are pretty good (though as I've been told sometimes simple sentences without commas are better than complex ones). One thing I like to see when reading these articles is a relevant picture (you can probably find a suitable one on Google Images, which is what I do). I find myself looking forward to your reaction to your draft, so that means you've captured my interest and wrote well enough to make me want to come back. Great job! Score: 8/10

[Crstats23 340]

Loved having you as a teammate my guy 

 

Review 

great job, I like how you included saying that both you and the organization took a chance and I think I can speak for spartan the chance paid off, nice paragraph structure allowed the article to flow easily although  couple of misspellings, good work.

Score 9/10