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Drama in the VHL


twists

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Drama in the VHL

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I love our dog shit drama as much as the next person, but I figured I'd offer some advice to those that get involved with it first hand. First off, this is the VHL. Unless things have drastically changed half the members are probably around 16 years old. So yes, you're probably arguing with a 16 year old. The remaining half of the VHL probably has a mental illness because we spend all day posting things on a forum, or talking in discord instead of experiencing actual real life. To summarize, if you get into an argument its either with a 16 year old, or someone who literally doesn't know how to communicate with people IRL. Just let that sink in for a minute. In general, the internet acts no where near how people act in real life. In fact, people are more likely to go to extremes on the internet because there are literally no repercussions and you have a cloak of anonymity on. If you're an older member, just stop for a second and realize that the person you're about to get into an argument with doesn't represent how people act in real life. Thank god for that. This isn't just true in the VHL, it's also true on Reddit, Twitter, honestly just about any form of social media. If you're one of our younger members, in time you'll realize that things that happen online, in different countries, in your government, etc. have no affect on you whatsoever. Regardless of what you want to believe, most things just do not matter. At most they'll cause a slight inconvenience for you moving forward. Another fun realization you'll have is that nobody actually cares about what your opinion is on X. You can yell, scream and shout, but it won't matter. Life goes on around you. 

 

Suffice to say, I'm not telling you to just accept things you don't like. You always have the option to leave. The VHL isn't going to suddenly decide to allow bigotry, so if your name starts with an Achilles you may want to throw the towel in. If you aren't having fun and just feeling frustrated, leave. Don't fall into the trap of "I used to like this thing, but now its different so even though I hate it, I'll force myself to stick around". That's called the sunk cost fallacy. 

 

Finally, if it feels like drama follows you around everywhere....well you're the reason. If you're constantly getting into arguments and you think the world is out to get you...well maybe its because your opinions fucking suck. We all tend to always believe our opinions and thoughts are the right ones, but that is almost never true. Be willing to see other peoples' sides of things, even if you do completely disagree with it. Being understanding has never hurt anyone and normally helps you change your beliefs, or maybe reinforce your current ones. Just don't automatically assume someone is wrong because their opinion is different. 

 

Thats it, that's my old man yelling at clouds rant. Try not to fight amongst each other because its never worth it. Well, it's worth it for those of us who get to view it independently, but thats not the point.

 

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I would recommend to anyone who gets caught up in some thread about some drama, remove yourself and instead of writing a wall of opinion, go find something on the forum that someone has put a lot of time and effort into that builds the VHL and showcases the abilities that our members have and leave a nice comment.  Give them props, show them their efforts are being appreciated and encourage them to keep going!

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