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City of Turku Attempting to Arrest Pajodcast


Corco

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Forward Charged with Terrorism After 3-Point Game

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S41 Draftee Rift Pajodcast was happy with his 3-point game, however the city of Turku was not.

 

TURKU, Finland - Last night the Turku Outlaws became the first victim of a three point game, courtesy of superstar Rift Pajodcast. The young sensation had a goal and an assist on the powerplay (courtesy of Unknown Player taking holding and high sticking penalties at 1:36 and 12:21 respectively) in the first period, while also adding an assist on a Teuvo Ruutuu goal less than a minute into the second period. While Pajodcast and his teammates were celebrating, the city of Turku, Finland was in mourning. All 177,326 individuals in the city had to be rushed to nearby mental hospitals in order to receive treatment for severe PTSD and emotional distress. Never had such a large group of people ever been victim of such a spanking before. Mayor Aleksi Randell had this to say regarding the incident: "Never has such a grand city been hit this hard by an unnatural disaster before. No one was spared, not even the children; reports are now coming in that unborn fetuses in the womb were seen to be crying in sonograms as a result of being manhandled so viciously. We will most certainly attempt to press mass terrorism charges on Pajodcast once our entire military force returns from Weenie Hut General. This man no, this thing, must be stopped at all costs."

Edited by Corco
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