How All My Players Were Snubbеd

[Grape 528]

I will be completely honest, none of my players have necessarily been snubbеd, so to speak. I have made four players at this point, none of them particularly a superstar by any means, but theme week is theme week and I want that bonus TPE so I guess I will give it a try and find something for each player that I can label as being snubbеd.

 

Player 1: Blake Laughton

 

My first player, created way back in season 66. In the VHLM draft, he did some snubbing of his own, being picked ahead of multiple, arguably better players at the time, despite not doing a single point task or even claiming any TPE to that point. Yet, because of the anime connection, was able to be picked decently high at the time and put onto a stacked Houston team. Of course, due to sabotaging their own growth, was pretty much rotting in the bottom six, eventually leading them to be traded to Ottawa to help Houston push for the championship. I guess I can count that as the first time they were snubbеd, a loyal Houston player disregarded for some high TPE player. Womp womp I guess. Didn’t amount to anything for either team. Houston didn’t even sniff the finals and Ottawa made a push the next season and fell short. Fast forward to the VHL draft, Laughton gets drafted to the Malmo Nighthawks (I guess he had a thing for expansion teams), and the season in which he would make the jump to the VHL, he was moved to New York, snubbеd by his draft team without even given a chance. He played one season with New York, in which nothing really came from it, then moved again to another expansion team in Prague, so snubbеd again. He simply was not good enough for any team, except for Prague I guess, where he spent pretty much the rest of his career, stopping for a cup of coffee in Helsinki and being sent back to Prague to finally retire a Phantom. 

 

Player 2: Shawty Nananana

 

A pure-passing defenseman, and was probably treated the best in terms of being snubbеd. They return to Houston and has a damn good season, but, next season comes around, Houston is in their tank phase, and despite wanting to stay in Houston, they were snubbеd for some draft picks and sent off to Halifax, where they have a great season, but end up losing out in the playoffs. After that, there really was not any more snubbing going on for the rest of their career, spending the entirety of their time in the VHL with Davos. I guess in a sense they were snubbеd of playing for a good team, but besides that it was a pretty lackluster career in the snubbеd department.

 

Player 3: Bob Vladovechsenkchushkin

 

This player is the one that has been snubbеd the most, in a couple major ways. VHLM went totally unsnubbеd, given a big role and stuck with the team that drafted me. Went up into the E, played two games, and was immediately traded to Vasteras. Why, I don’t know. Whatever. But in my time with Vasteras, came the biggest snub of my entire time with the VHL. I am someone who likes to do meme builds, and the idea with Vladovechsenkchushkin was to basically be a pure checking and fighting forward with stone hands and no skating ability whatsoever. However, the Vasteras GM got on my ass about it, telling me to use the free reroll with the hybrid attributes and actually make a good player. So, reluctantly, my fun meme build was snubbеd for something actually useful. It was something that pained me so, as now I have to be a positive contributor on my team. That was not the last of the snubbing, however. The VHL team that drafted me, Helsinki, decided I wasn’t gonna be good enough for them and they’d rather have someone else, so off I went to LA. Played a couple seasons there, tuned up my build, got snubbеd for a younger player, shipped off to Calgary. Had a damn good season in Calgary, but they couldn’t afford me, so I was traded to Davos. Davos snubbеd me, got traded to Vancouver. Vancouver snubbеd me, got traded to Malmo. Sign a one year deal with Malmo, have a decent season, then back on the market I go. On the market, I was snubbеd by Helsinki a SECOND time, even after they said that they were heavily interested in having me. I guess they changed their mind, then shipped me off to Vancouver. In the last season of their career, Vancouver basically told me they didn’t have the money to keep me around, and wanted to replace me with a younger player, and at that point, I said screw it, I’m not going through that whole song and dance again, and retired.

 

Player 4: Obuz Schneider Canet du Bocage 

Obuz is barely into their long and prosperous career, and already they have been snubbеd. One of the few premier French players eligible for the World Juniors, and they were snubbеd for some random schmuck, and was therefore forced to represent Team Asia instead of the region with their home country. A great insult to Obuz, who always dreamed of one day showcasing his talents on behalf of his great nation. Although, Obuz himself snubbеd the Stockholm Vikings, choosing to stay and play for Halifax of the VHLM instead of going to Europe and playing for the team that drafted them, and plans to completely skip the VHLE altogether and go straight to the show, where hopefully they will go through the rest of their career unsnubbеd.

- Also obligatory snubbеd every single draft because I wasn’t taken first overall and also snubbеd by every team for not trying to make absolutely ludicrous offers to bring any of my players in, despite them totally being the best player in the league.

- Also snubbеd for best GM every single season I’ve been a GM just because I was too good and the league didn’t want to have to give the award to the same person every single season for the rest of my tenure.

(1040 words)

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