Grimgor Ironhide is speechless and angry

[FrostBeard 2,054]

Helsinki, Finland, 27.03.2024

 

Grimgor Ironhide is speechless and angry

 

Grimgor has been asked to join a press conference to discuss his plans for the off-season, playoff performance and his opinion on cheese puffs. 

 

Hello, Mr. Ironhide, I am Jeremy Radclaw from Drawn Sports Magazine, we have heard that after Helsinki lost their playoff series against London, you decided to absolutely cut all ties with your fellow players and have not engaged with them since then - is it true?

 

...

 

Grimgor, do you think your own performance was one of the main contributing factors for the loss?

 

...

 

Grimgor Ironhide has been called out for not being able to play under real pressure, do you think you can ease that mindset and help fans reignite with next season in mind?

 

...

 

Sir, you have finally answer something, what are your plans for the off-season, do you plan to head somewhere or just spend time in Helsinki while thinking about how to tackle next seasons aspirations?

 

After a long pause, Grimgor stands up and angrily looks at every reporter wanting to ask his questions, waits a moment while the air starts to feel heavy and almost suffocating and speaks.

 

Listen ya cupcake eatin' squigg,  Grimgor does what he wants, if I want to go and pillage a village somewhere, I do that, if I want to eat a massive fruit pie every day, I do dat, if I want to go and sleep and cry in my sleep while waiting for a price to come and rescue me, I do that. Ya not da boss of me. I am not happy, terrible performance by me, I should play better so all can see my true potential. Waaaagh, I am so angry I could break you in half and eat you like a popsicle on a hot winter's day ya squigg hugger! 

 

All I want is to play some big games, get many points and be da best of da class in numbers. Dat is not hard to imagine, especially for a brainy guy like you! I have never felt this feeling - some called it pain of losing, I call it my biggest weakness, I feel so puny and weak, almost like I never existed. It is sad but it also fills me with unimaginable rage to go and make sure everyone knows how big and strong Grimgor Ironhide really is. WAAAGH!

 

Sir, before you leave, I have one more intricate question, journalist asks Grimgor as he slowly turns to them with a strong and fierce smile on their face, as if he was insulted by the weakest gobbo of Skarsniks raiding party. Do you sir know how to bake a Latvian cake? 

 

Grimgor's smile suddenly turns from having a deep and horrifying visage to a warm, welcoming, almost your had-grandmother type of a smile, warm, likable but still worrisome. 

 

"Yes, I have my recepies in my trunk, in ma room. I get it to ya when I see ya next time. Finally someone is asking real questions. It is very tough to get the dough flour to work as you don't have any dragon blood available for quick yeast activation. No matter what, be smart, get quality non powder milk."

 

WAAAAGH!

[Spartan 4,408]

Rumor mills on hyperdrive

[Victor 10,949]

Doesn't seem particularly speechless

[Ahma 1,431]

WAAAAAGHHHH!

[FrostBeard 2,054]

16 minutes ago, Victor said:

Doesn't seem particularly speechless

Answered 40% of questions - I think that qualifies.