Claimed:All Star Fraud? [Reviewed]

[der meister 3,186]

 

"Vote early! Vote often?"

 

The headline seemed to scream louder than the infamous cry of the newspaper hawkers, who clutched the bundles in their near frozen talons on the early morning sidewalks of New York City. The reason for the article was the current VHL All-Star Game vote rankings, which had the hometown captain, Jorma Ruutu, as the early runaway favorite to captain Team North America in the upcoming contest. At the time of the printing, Ruutu had amassed nearly 28% of the public vote, which might not seem impressive unless you consider that the field of nominees is 13 strong. This statistical outlier led the newspaper's chief investigative journalist to dig a little deeper into the story of Jorma Ruutu, and what he found shocked the world.

 

"Yes, Jorma Ruutu is the heart and soul of the New York Americans franchise," the article begins, "but does he really deserve to be leading all North American skaters in voting? His point totals are less than half of his teammate, Edwin Reencarnacion. He even trails Reencarnacion in hits 197 to 190, in plus/minus 33 to 2, and in shot blocks 23 to 20. So what is the secret to Ruutu's success?"

 

Ruutu leading by example

 

The article goes on to allege widespread voter fraud, with votes for the feisty Finnish winger coming through proxied IP addresses that bounce off of oil rigs in the South Pacific, traveling menageries in Western Ukraine, and unlicensed flophouses in south-central Texas. A team spokesman called the allegations "interesting, but pure poppycock."  

 

However, an official from VHL corporate offices, speaking under anonymity, nearly refuted the American's public relations employee when he said, "There may be more to this story than you will ever know." 

 

In the end, it is highly doubtful that Ruutu fails to represent Team North America, and even more doubtful that the truth to this voting anomaly is ever completely revealed. Ultimately, the truth is that Ruutu is a fan favorite and, much like the NHL's John Scott, provides a feel good story for hockey fans in New York City and around the world. His attitude and commitment has never been in question, and he provides an unquestionably strong emotional leadership for the New York Americans, who are all but guaranteed to make the playoffs once again this season. So does it matter whether or not Jorma Ruutu is receiving illegal support in the [likely] form of multiple votes? In light of these allegations, should the VHL review its policy of one vote per person and simply embrace the inevitable change of direction from the world's moral compass? Is the tried-and-true method of one person is one vote still the best? Should votes for North American players by North Americans count as 1 vote, but votes from outside of North America as 3/5ths of a vote, putting the world's minorities back in their rightful place? Time will tell what the reaction to the article will be, but at worst, it got people talking, and in the end, that's what democracy is all about.

 

Editor's Note: Jorma Ruutu was unavailable for comment.

Edited April 5, 2016 by der meister

[jRuutu 2,464]

Vote for Ruutu is a vote for love and freedom.

[Victor 10,937]

This is precisely why CLEGANEBOWL would be the only fair way to settle this.

[evrydayimbyfuglien 600]

Review:

This is great. Good read, good grammar, looked good. Very well done. Looks like you took your time on it. This coupled with the .com article you wrote make me excited to read what you write from here on out. 

[CowboyinAmerica 2,889]

Claimed