Bobby Butthole Bio [In Progress] [2/2]

[Bobby Bummhole 25]

Born to Bryanna and Byron Butthole, bobby butthole had a lot of challenges when he was growing up, especially with a name like bobby butthole. He grew up in a cold barren wasteland of Armenia and his family was very poor, until one day will digging a grave for the family pig his father struck oil, and they moved to the United States. When he moved to a new school He was teased tremendously as a kid and struggled to fit in, he used this pent up aggression and determination to become a very successful athlete at a very young age. when he was in elementary school he was playing several organized sports, hockey, soccer, gymnastics, football, badminton and excelled at all of them, but hockey was the one that he truly fell in love with. He would hear the opposing team laughing at the word butthole on the back of his jersey and he could deliver a hard hip check when they weren’t paying attention. His defensive game was very impressive to scouts and he even managed to rack up some points. This led him to be offered a scholarship to Harvard to play hockey, he graciously accepted. In his first year he had 89 hits in 33 games. A lot 15 points and a +19 logging impressive numbers for a freshman.

 

His game only improved through the year and by the end he was looking like a seasoned veteran on the backend for a talented Harvard team. By this time his height and size were insane, he was 6’7 and almost 220. When asked about how his son became to get so tall, his father said “well I’m 5’5 and my wife is 5’2...Our old neighbor was like 7’4 though...”. He became very well known in his home country because when Armenia managed to qualify for the world juniors as the promotion team, he was selected to play and absolutely dominated. His size and strength struck fear into opponents who at times looked like they were fleeing the Armenian giant. Armenia was till crushed 0-6 in the tournament with a goal difference of 3-29. 2 of the goals were scored by Bobby. The other was well known Armenian janitor/Hockey player Maurice Schklowitz.

 

After the tournament he returned to college hockey and continued to dominate, his offensive game improving and in a skills competition, he actually broke chara’s record for hardest slap shot ever. He was named captain and led Harvard on a run to the frozen 4 that year, picking up a hat trick against Michigan in game but but were ultimately eliminated. While he has always been a talented hockey player..He’s never actually won anything, no team awards, no personal awards, the closest thing to that was being named captain of the Harvard team. All the teams he’s played for have never won a championship, so wether or not that says something about him we’re not sure, he might just be a butthole. He says his number one goals right now in the world in win something, even a couple bucks on a scratch ticket, but something.

 

After an enraged Bobby ripped 2 lockers out of the lockerroom and threw them in the ice after a 5-1 loss he was suspended from Harvard, he began to look at his options for hockey, but then the Minnesota storm Of the VHLM made contact and offered him a contract. He graciously accepted and flew to Minnesota to meeting his new teammates with hopes, that they dont laugh when his name is called.

 

 

[Matmenzinger 167]

Hey just a heads up, I would edit this and add a a few more paragraphs. Biographies need to be 1000 words minimum in order to get the full 10 TPE from them.

[Greg_Di 942]

Review:  This bio is only 593 words. Bio's need to be 1000 words. I would add pictures to this bio as well as some quotes. You have a good start but you should expand more on his childhood growing up in Armenia. You could also add some history on his high school years. Great start and looking forward to the update @Bobby Bummhole

[Jayrad28 369]

Review: Really short but funny at parts. The whole neighbor thing cracked me up, add some more about childhood and maybe some pictures and it’s mint!