Alucard

"The devil is in all of you!"

Awesome idea! I'd love one for Nezhmetdinov, based on Nikita Scherbak.

Thank you!

Go Lynx! And Smarch, it's true. No one's gay for Moleman

Thanks. I tried to make it interesting! Added a few stats since you read it too

VHL.COM Lynx dominate Wild in Game 2 Monday, 06.08.2015 Theo Matsikas had four assists as Ottawa Lynx defeated Saskatoon Wild 5-2 in Game 2 of the VHLM North American Quarterfinals. Ottawa -- Monday night saw Ottawa Lynx extend their lead over Saskatoon Wild to 2-0 in the second game of their North American Quarterfinal match. Lenny Face failed to produce the same heroics that prevented the Lynx from running away with game one, and goals from Thomas Duddy, Kyle Keenan, Jorma Ruutu (2), and Souryuu Kaminogi gave the home side a 5-2 win in Ottawa. Domination The Lynx dominated game one, but won only by a single goal as Wild goaltender Lenny Face pulled off an impressive 38 saves on 40 shots. Game two was to be an entirely different story, though. The Wild, who had 23 shots in game one, were held to just 16 across three periods, while their hosts managed a domineering 52 attempts on goal, scoring on 5 of those. The result means that Ottawa’s overall record against the Wild this season is 11-2, with the respective sides’ goals per game average coming in at 3.69 to 2.38. The series will move on to Saskatoon for games three and four, where the Wild will look to beat Ottawa on home ice for the first time this season. Fast Start The opening period saw both sides register nine shots, but it was the Lynx who were the more productive, netting on three of those nine shots. With just 4:42 on the clock, Theo Matsikas fed left winger Thomas Duddy for the opening goal, and twenty seconds later it was two. Again it was Matsikas with the decisive pass, this time for Kyle Keenan to rip one by Face, and give the Lynx a perfect start to the game. The Wild came back at the hosts thereafter, and goaltender Greg Clegane had to make five stops before his opposite number touched the puck again. The pressure finally paid dividends just shy of the twelve minute mark, as top-line centre Hunter Backenbauer found the net on an assist from Erik Hedman and Casper Salomon. The visitors couldn’t maintain their pressure thereafter, though, and under three minutes later Kerkko Hyvärinen set Jorma Ruutu away, and the Finn duly restored his side’s two goal lead. Consolidation The first period of game one had been a tight affair, but thereafter the Lynx had begun to dominate. Game two saw this become a trend, as Ottawa outshot their opponents 21 to 5, though they only managed to find the net once, through Souryuu Kaminogi. Defenseman Theo Matsikis recorded his third assist on four goals, as the Lynx consolidated their advantage and essentially put the game beyond doubt. It was going to take a heroic effort from the Wild to come back from a 4-1 scoreline at the end of the second, and ultimately they never looked capable of doing so. Four-Star Performance The third period was all Ottawa. Wild managed only two shots in the entire period, and Greg Clegane must have been disappointed to have let one of those in, as Casper Salomon netted a late consolation for the visitors. Prior to that, Ruutu had netted his second of the game, benefitting from Theo Matsikas’ fourth assist of the game. Unsurprisingly, Matsikas was awarded the first star performance on the night, with teammates Ruutu and Duddy filling the other two spots. All To Do Heading into game three, Saskatoon have it all to do. They kept the score close in game one, but never really looked like winning, and game two was little short of a blowout. Their offence is struggling to produce against an Ottawa team who has completely dominated them in the opening games of the series, and on the evidence of those two games, only a madman or a genius would bet against the Lynx progressing to the semifinals. 1st Star: THEO MATSIKAS (D) G: 0 Shots: 5 A: 4 Hits: 2 P: 4 PIM: 0 =/-: 5 TOI: 28:23 2nd Star: JORMA RUUTU (LW) G: 2 Shots: 12 A: 1 Hits: 0 P: 3 PIM: 2 =/-: 3 TOI: 25:05 3rd Star: THOMAS DUDDY (LW) G: 1 Shots: 16 A: 1 Hits: 0 P: 2 PIM: 0 =/-: 2 TOI: 20:22 Word count: 650 excluding stats

Wahey! +1 debut for Nezhmetdinov!

Ah, but then you're just a white guy with a black face. At that rate chimney sweeps would be the flashest mofos on the block! Then again... I don't think a white man could get away with wearing the suit PK's wearing in Advantage's avatar.

Thanks for the welcomes, guys! Advantage, I actually do have a question: how does one go about looking as flash as Mr. Subban without actually being Mr. Subban? I'm far too short and far too white to even dream of being P.K.

Vietto looks like a very good player, so I'm guessing we won't sign him

Cherysev is one of those prospects who just never made the grade at Real. He's been on loan at Villarreal, and I've heard some good things about him, but I've not seen him play. Verdict: ???

As much as I'd like to see Milner sign for Liverpool, I refuse to get excited over it until his name is on paper. He could just as easily join Arsenal, though I would hesitantly mention as well that he wants first team football, and he's more likely to get it at Liverpool than at Arsenal. As for Benteke... meh. Everyone saw the difference that Suarez made, and the same with Torres before him. Liverpool need to spend big on a striker, but they have to sign someone who is a proven goalscorer. Benteke has only proven himself to be inconsistent.

CHILLIN' WITH THE CUCUMBER VHL FORUM SPOTLIGHT ON: EVGENY NEZHMETDINOV VHLM Draft Talk With the VHLM draft fast approaching, we sat down to talk with one of the league's newest prospects. Evgeny Nezhmetdinov is a Kazakh winger with a taste for the dramatic. Operating primarily on the right, his speed and puck-handling skills are sure to make him a favourite with the fans wherever he winds up, but questions still remain over his defensive capabilities. This week, we sat down with Evgeny to pose him some questions of our own. VHL: Evgeny, welcome. A lot of fans of the VHL and VHLM won't have heard of you. Tell them what they're missing. E: Uh... I don't know, haha... I guess my skills? I don't know. Some people talk about my speed, or my puck-handling. I think they will know me after shoot-outs. Oh, I know! They have no cucumbers in the stands. At Snezhnye we have always cucumbers in the stands! VHL: Ah yes, the cucumber! Tell us about that. Why are you called the cucumber? E: Is actually a funny story. When I was 16 I went to competition for vegetables. My uncles (sic.) grows giant vegetables, and every year they look at the vegetables—many of the farmers grow them, and they compete—and they judge, and pick the biggest, nicest-looking vegetables for prize. My father and I went to watch, and before they pick winners, I was running—playing the fool, I think you say—and I fell over a cucumber. I broke my ankle, couldn't play hockey for five, maybe six months, and all my friends call me Kiyar. Kiyar is cucumber in Kazakhstan. VHL: Breaking your ankle isn't very funny, but it's good that you can laugh about it now! Do you even like cucumber? E: I like me! Cucumber the vegetable? Is ok. Is nice in Kazakh salad. VHL: You'll have to make us one of those so we can judge for ourselves! So you grew up playing hockey in Kazakhstan; a lot of scouts from the KHL came to see you play last year, yet you've said that you want to play in the VHL. Why is that? E: VHL is exciting. There is great fans, the community is awesome... Already I see on the internet fans of VHL talking about me, and all I hear is good things, like... 'beware the cucumber', and 'super-star in the making'. I like this. I look on KHL, NHL, or on reddit—NHL sub—I hear some good things there, but also 'oh he is so small', 'he can't'... how you say, 'hack the big leagues'? Or 'oh, Chára will destroy him'. I think 'please, I will dance around Chára!' VHL: So you don't like the negativity you receive from the NHL fans? E: Yes, something like this. Is not so much negativity from NHL fans, but positivity from VHL. VHL: Well we will definitely agree with you there. So for fans of the VHL and VHLM who don't know you, tell us how you got into hockey. E: Honestly? VHL: Is it a big secret? E: Haha. Maybe. In high school I see hockey, I like hockey... but then there is girl. Irina, she is called. She... likes hockey. She likes hockey players, haha. VHL: Ah, so you thought if you were a hockey player... E: Exactly! Haha! VHL: You were only in it for the nookie! E: Uh... the what? VHL: Never mind. You'll learn about that if you wind up in North America. So you and Irina... did you...? E: No. I think it is for best. One year later I hear her talking to her friend, and she says 'oh, I hate cucumber! Is disgusting!' VHL: Definitely for the best. I know I could never go out with a girl who didn't like how I tasted. (Here Evgeny laughed so hard that he slapped his thigh, and told he us he liked us. By now we really liked him as well, and we hope he winds up in the VHL. He's sure to liven up any locker room!) VHL: So you obviously didn't stop playing hockey after that. Did you just fall in love with the game? Instead of Irina? E: Yes. There will be other Irinas, I said. But hockey? There is no other hockey. VHL: There's field hockey. E: Ah, yes, but in Kazakhstan we have too many fields, and in all of them sheep, and cows, and they s**t in fields. This is not fun. VHL: Haha! That's true; there's no s**t on the ice rink. Well, Evgeny, it's been a pleasure meeting you. I wish there were more cucumbers like you in the league. Before we go, is there anything else you'd like to share with us? E: Uh... I should leave on good note, yes? You have young fans read VHL Forum? Yes? To them I say: do what you love. And eat your vegetables. VHL: Just don't eat the cucumber, right? E: Haha. Well... maybe if Irina is reading... We thought we'd better end things there, before the conversation became unsuitable for those younger readers. It was a brief chat, but one we won't forget for a while, and especially not if Evgeny winds up playing in the VHLM next year. If he does, you can bet we'll be the ones in the front row waving giant cardboard cucumbers over our heads. All we can say in closing is... #dealwithit #cucumber #vhlforum #vhlmdraft

Edited: left out a 'the'

Thanks guys! Apparently the only difference between Russian Cyrillic and Kazakh Cyrillic is accents. Who knew?

Evgeny Nezhmetdinov From VHLWiki, the VHL encyclopedia Evgeny Nezhmetdinov Evgeny Vasilievich Nezhmetdinov (Russian: Евге́ний Васильевич Нежметдинов, Kazakh: Евгений Васильевич Нежметдинов) is a Kazakh ice hockey player of Tatar heritage. A flashy winger, he can play on the right or the left, and has a penchant for the unpredictable. He is currently an unsigned prospect who is widely believed to be headed for the VHLM. Contents Childhood in Aktobe Astana & Junior Hockey College & Minor League Hockey Awards The Cucumber Incident Childhood in Aktobe Nezhmetdinov was born in Aktobe, Kazakhstan, to a Russian-Kazakh father and Tatar mother. As a boy he exhibited an interest in the outdoors, as well as chess and checkers. His father, an amateur chess player and a prominent lawyer in Aktobe, was the primary influence over the young Evgeny. Together they would travel to the countryside, go hiking or bird-watching, and, in the winter, they would skate upon the frozen lakes. It was from his father that Evgeny first learned how to play chess, and for his seventh birthday, received his very first chess set. A year later he was presented with a book of the games of Alexandr Alekhine, and within a matter of months he won his first game against his father. From his mother he learned the Tatar language, one of four he can speak today. Nezhmetdinov competing in a junior tournament in Astana, aged 10. At the age of 10, Nezhmetdinov travelled to the Kazakh capital, Astana, to compete in a junior chess competition. He performed admirably, scoring five and half out of eight, and tying for fourth place overall. His sole loss in the tournament came against the eventual winner, future Women’s Grandmaster Dinara Saduakassova. Little over a year later, he and his family returned to Astana, as the Nezhmetdinovs moved permanently to the capital to facilitate the furthering of Evgeny’s father’s career. This was the first period of great change in the young boy’s life, and one that would benefit him in years to come. Astana & Junior Hockey In Astana he continued his interest in chess, competing regularly in junior tournaments around the city. He excelled in school, most notably in language studies, and by this time was fluent in both Kazakh and Tatar (owing to his mother’s fluency). In addition, he also studied Russian, and the literary works of great Russian authors like Pushkin, Chekhov, and Gogol (and in future years Tolstoy, Dostoyevsky, and Bulgakov). More notably, it was in Astana that he first began to develop an interest in ice hockey.[*] At the age of twelve, he tried out for his school's junior hockey team, and soon became a core aspect of the team's play. Though he struggled with the physical and defensive aspects of the game (owing to his diminutive stature), he was a quick and agile youth, and his athleticism proved a great asset on the ice, and on offence. His love for the sport grew quickly, and the coming years saw him spend less time sat before a chess board, and more time spent honing his skating and puck-handling skills. Everything was not rainbows and sunshine for the youngster, however. A year after becoming a hockey player, his mother was involved in a fatal car crash, and his ability to read and converse in Tatar suddenly became more than just an ability; it was now a memento of his mother's existence, of his own heritage, and—in many ways—a memento mori. Though still just a teenager, Nezhmetdinov realised for the first time that life could be taken away at any moment. He had already coped with being uprooted from his childhood home when his family moved to the capital; now he had to cope with the loss of his mother. Life is fleeting, and precious, and Nezhmetdinov resolved to cherish life and all its pleasures, and dedicated himself to his love of ice hockey. The loss of his mother also saw Evgeny draw even closer to his father, who had always been a key figure in the youth's life. Now he began to share in his father’s love of classical music, and together they frequented the city’s national concert hall, witnessing performances of Shostakovich, Prokofiev, Tchaikovsky, Rachmaninov, and Stravinsky. In return, his father took him to watch his very first ice hockey game (between Barys Astana and HC Almaty), and thus the pair began to attend Barys’ home games on a regular basis. As his abilities continued to improve, Nezhmetdinov found himself under the watchful eye of scouts from the junior leagues, and at the age of fifteen he was recruited by an affiliate of Barys. Playing on the right wing, and occasionally on the left, Nezhmetdinov’s speed became a great asset to the hockey club, and he was part of a junior side that won back-to-back Kazakh titles. In particular, Nezhmetdinov played a key role in the second of these runs, scoring an audacious penalty shot in the semi-finals (a cheeky drag-and-chip goal), and netting the overtime winner that clinched the cup. He lead his team in points throughout the season, and contributed much on offence. When asked about his defensive abilities, however, one of his coaches quipped that Nezhmetdinov “couldn’t kill a moth, let alone a penalty.” Nezhmetdinov in action in a shootout. Unfortunately, Nezhmetdinov suffered a bizarre injury ahead of the following season (tripping over an over-grown cucumber), causing him to miss much of the regular season with a broken ankle. He returned for the latter half of the season, however, performing well enough to earn a contract with Snezhnye Barsy. College & Minor League Hockey After graduating from high school, Nezhmetdinov moved on to college, and spent three years studying at Nazarbayev University. By the time he finished school he was already fluent in three languages, and had begun to learn a fourth: English. This proficiency with languages set him in good stead for his new course, and at the end of three years he graduated with a bachelor’s degree in Linguistics. During this time he also experienced many firsts, including his first girlfriend, and his first arrest, for being drunk and disorderly in public. Nezhmetdinov allegedly tried to claim that a “12 inch hot-and-spicy” pizza was his, and, when the pizza was given to another customer (who had actually ordered it), threatened to expose himself as proof. He then refused to either accept the pizza he had ordered, or to leave the premises. All of this took place in broad daylight, and an image was captured on his girlfriend's phone. He later apologised for the incident, claiming that it was a joke that had gotten out of hand. Nezhmetdinov being arrested in broad daylight, captured on his girlfriend's phone On the ice, there were no such controversies. At Barsy Nezhmetdinov benefitted from a higher standard of coaching than he had previously received, and though he struggled with the physical aspects of training, his puck-handling abilities ensured that he was a regular starter for the team. During his three year tenure Barsy won no titles, but the young winger provided plenty of highlight reel moments along the way, drawing the attention of scouts from the KHL, NHL, KHC (Kazakhstan Hockey Championship), and the coveted VHL. Awards Two Junior Kazakh titles One Championship Game MVP award The Cucumber Incident Prior to entering his final year of high school, Nezhmetdinov and his father attended a vegetable-judging competition in a rural area outside of Aktobe. Nezhmetdinov's uncle (along with other of his relations) is a farmer, and as a hobby grows large vegetables to be judged each year in competition. Whilst observing, Nezhmetdinov tripped over the protruding stalk of an large, overgrown cucumber, fell awkwardly, and broke his ankle. The incident earned him the nickname 'Kiyar' (қияр), meaning 'cucumber' in Kazakh.[*] References [*] Chillin' With the Cucumber (and David Cameron), VHL Forum: http://www.vhlforum.com/index.php?/topic/20756-chillin-with-the-cucumber-and-david-cameron—evgeny-nezhmetdinov/?p=224631

Evgeny Nezhmetdinov—unassigned

Go Habs, go! And yeah, being a Liverpool fan can be disheartening, but the season before this one just gone was fantastic. Coincidentally, it was also the most heart-breaking -.-

Ah, I knew it! The prospect of doubling either a rookie profile or a biography seemed too good to be true It's probably better that way, to be fair, otherwise all the biographies would be of rookies, and none of the players they are written about would have had the time to grow up and get involved in any kind of interesting shenanigans. Phil, good point on the Leafs, haha. Their failings have actually made it more difficult for me to pick up on the rivalry, whereas it only took one watching the highlights from the 2014 play-off series between Montreal and Boston for me to learn to hate the Bruins

Thanks for the welcomes! The forums are a little overwhelming, but there's a lot of good information about too. That being said, there are a couple of things I could do with having cleared up for me, such as whether the rookie profile is only written after being assigned to a team, and whether or not there are any restrictions on the TPE doubling benefit afforded to newcomers (mentioned here). If not, I'm assuming it would be best for me to choose point tasks with high TPE for my first three tasks.

Hey hockey people, I'm completely new around here, and pretty new to hockey in general. I only began watching the sport around the beginning of the play-offs this year, but I'm hooked! Clearly ice hockey is sports equivalent to crack. I'm a Montreal Canadiens fan (looking forward to teasing and being teased by Bruins and Leafs fans), and—luckily—I also support Liverpool Football Club in the English Premiership. I say 'luckily' because I've been assured that being a Habs fan is no different than being a Liverpool fan: each year you get your hopes up, and each year those hopes are horribly and painfully crushed. Yay! I entirely forget how I came across this site; I was looking for something along these lines, so I guess I stumbled upon it during my search. I thought it might have been mentioned on the games forum over on www.ehmtheblueline.com, but now I can't find mention of it there, so... perhaps not! I've already created a player, and am looking forward to seeing how he gets on with/against all of your players!