Gretzky didnt lift da puck

I could use an editor in my job. I have so many press releases during the off-season. I write the release, send it to our staff, and if no one says anything, blast it to our fans. I work for a hockey team

Yeah so, I actually do a lot of what this is about for a living. I'm a Media Relations Manager and Broadcaster for an ECHL team. I write press releases, write feature stories, shoot videos, run social media, etc. on a daily basis. And yes, our social media voice is very sarcastic, and I do roast people from the team's accounts. This is fun because I don't have to research stats and get clearances from our NHL affiliate to post anything.

Wait... you have a B.S in Mass Communication: Electronic Media too???? From the same school as me??? WOAH?!

LOSPENOV WORKS OUT STATESIDE FOR SCOUTS BLAINE, MN – With his entry draft fast approaching, Russian-born forward Mikhail Lospenov has come stateside to work out in front of US-based scouts. Lospenov, 18, has been demolishing defenses in the MHL, the Russian junior league, with Lokomotiv Yaroslavl, but has decided that the time has come to leave his native land and explore options outside of the KHL. “I’ve only been to America to be a tourist and watch my brother play,” said Lospenov. “This time, I’m here to work and get drafted.” The forward has been putting in the work in Blaine, MN where he has been on the ice at Fogerty Arena, the same arena where his older brother Vanek won an NAHL Robertson Cup with the Aberdeen Wings six years ago. Last week, Lospenov was performing two skates per day, one with full pads and the other in shell protection. On numerous occasions, multiple VHL scouts have attended these workouts, making note of the youngster’s speed and shooting abilities that dazzled during his days in Russia.

MIKHAIL LOSPENOV Lokomotiv Yaroslavl (MHL) Report Compiled By: Grant LaRoque (fmr. SD Marlins scout) PROFILE Position: Forward Shoots: Right Height / Weight: 6’3, 187 lbs Born: August 7, 2003 | Penza, RU Nation: Russia REPORT Lospenov is a speedy, agile, forward who has proven himself a scoring threat against same-level competition and beyond. A no-brainer for the Lokomotiv top-6 moving forward, Lospenov carries himself with a professional attitude. While he has been able to crack the senior line-up for his club, he has the potential to far exceed what the KHL can offer him, hence the desire and necessity to enter the VHLM. It is no secret that the Lospenov name carries a hefty burden on Mikhail, especially since his brother, Vanek, recently called it quits after just a 4 ½ year career with the San Diego Marlins. The world has already seen that the younger of the Lospenovs carries himself with a class and authority, unlike his older sibling, but the noise is still there, and all eyes are on Mikhail Lospenov’s every move. SKATING Lospenov can blow by anyone who gets caught sleeping on the defensive side of the puck. To put it plainly, the kid is fast, really fast. His edgework is pristine amongst junior competition, but he leaves more to be desired when trying to craft his way into the slot. Speed can get him there, but the swift movements leave him vulnerable to being caught off balance. Luckily for a team that pick him, that is coachable. SHOOTING/PLAYMAKING The question isn’t if Lospenov can score, but rather how many can he score? A lethal shot, accompanied by the speed that he possesses, makes for a nearly unstoppable offensive lamp-lighter in Lospenov. The range on this kid’s shot is unbelievable, showing steady climb and velocity even from the top corner of the blue line. A simple cutback into a middle-ice lane, and you can already start inking up your score sheet. The drawback, he’s not great in-tight. He’s big, he’s strong, but he’s timid. Any coach should focus on contact drills and get this kid comfortable with a net-side battle. Do that, and its game over. HOCKEY SENSE Lospenov has hockey in his blood. While his brother may have been more into off-ice tactics, Mikhail is all about the ice. He sees the game like very few can. Finding open lanes is one thing, anticipating them and making the dish before it even appears is what sets Lospenov apart. Bottom line: This kid is a hockey player. PROJECTION Lospenov has what it takes to be a top-6 VHL star someday. Scratch that; A top-line VHL star. His development is on pace to see him make the show in no-time and make an immediate impact when he does.

Shoutout the the BCHL reference... It's no NAHL but its a solid tier 2 alternative!

https://imgur.com/a/hjstWzP

PENZA, RU – Older siblings often set the standard for how the younger sibling will be judged, but that is anything but the case when it comes to Mikhail Lospenov and writing his own story. Lospenov, a native of Penza, RU, might raise eyebrows because of his name. The younger brother to now-retired, bad-boy of the VHLM, Vanek Lospenov, Mikhail has built a reputation of being the player his brother never could. After a stellar scoring display at the 15U level in his hometown of Penza, Lospenov made the 11-hour trip, north, to Yaroslavl to begin his junior career with Lokomotiv Yaroslavl, the junior affiliate of the Kontinental Hockey League side with the same name. Lospenov wasted little time turning heads with Lokomotiv, as he dazzled in Sochi at the 2019 Sirius Junior Hockey World Cup, scoring four goals and two assists as his side would finish runner-up to Finnish side Oulun Karpat in the tournament final. The performance earned Lospenov an opportunity to perform at the highest level when he was granted a roster spot for Lokomotiv’s KHL pre-season game against Jokerit Helsinki on September 16, 2019. While the 16-year old’s ice-time was limited to just 6:31, Lospenov impressed, scoring his first professional goal on his second shift. Lospenov’s image was in the process of being shaped, but at the same time, it was being overshadowed by the news that his older brother of four years, had just signed a professional contract with the Peoria Rivermen in the SPHL. Vanek Lospenov had already begun spitting his infamous jabs and throwing his even-more memorable tantrums, but Mikhail immediately separated his path to hockey glory from his brother’s following his pre-season debut. “I’m my own man, and I will write my own story,” he said through a translator. “I’m not here to talk about my brother. I love him, but I’m here to talk about what I can do; what I will do.” From that moment, the media, the fans, and scouts across the KHL and the rest of the world knew that Mikail Lospenov would be the Lospenov that would go the distance. Throughout the 2019-20 season, Lospenov would earn four call-ups to the senior team and would total 12 games played. In those opportunities, Lospenov netted five goals and three assists, marking himself as the heir to the Lokomotiv scoring lead. After Egor Averin returned to the Lokomotiv lineup after recovering from a season ending surgery, the post-COVID-19 situation became difficult for Lospenov at the senior level. Returning to the junior ranks for a final season, Lospenov torched the competition through the 62-game campaign. Mikhail totaled 87 points in his farewell campaign, netting 41 goals and seeing his team make the eastern conference finals. With his skill-set, Lospenov will easily attract VHLM scouts’ attention and will reward those who take the risk of bringing a Lospenov into their locker room handsomely

1. Honestly, my buddy was all over me about joining the league, so I decided why not, and it has been awesome 2. Using my real-world job and putting it to use to create an awesome story 3. Not really. If anything, he resembles the bravado that I have when I'm 12 beers deep. 4. I'm excited to see what clever storylines and world-building I can come up with 5. the 1974 and 1975 Stanley Cup Champion Philadelphia Flyers. 6. Nope, so I'm excited to get into this and make is something special

#Royalty!

Player Information Username: Gretzky didnt lift da puck Player Name: Mikhail Lospenov Recruited From: Returning Age: 18 Position: RW Height: 75 in. Weight: 187 lbs. Birthplace: Russia Player Page @VHLM GM

https://imgur.com/7OSfVfo

THE CURIOUS CASE OF VANEK LOSPENOV From train wreck to unstoppable train? That is the exact situation the San Diego Marlins find themselves in with their defenseman and VHLM “Bad Boy” Vanek Lospenov. Lospenov, who earlier this month turned into William Sherman and seemingly burnt every bridge on his way out of San Diego, has gone silent on social media and just the opposite on the ice. On August 5, the day after Lospenov was arrested in Minneapolis, Lospenov began a firestorm of comments aimed at the Marlins and General Manager Thad Sales. Lospenov cited the team’s lack of transactions and last place standing as reasons for his discontent. A week later, Lospenov, his agent, and his consulting agency took to Twitter and scolded The Marlins for their treatment of the 22-year old. The same day, the trio submitted a formal trade to the team, which was denied. Tensions seemed to be boiling over as the two sides set course for separation, but after a Friday of tweeting, Lospenov fell silent. The Marlins made a pair of trades on August 7, and the deals seemingly pleased Lospenov, who promptly repaid the Marlins with a run of form that cannot be stopped. On August 5, Lospenov was -16 with 3 goals and a plethora of mistimed penalties. Since the trades, Lospenov has added 6 more goals, 13 assists, and dropped his plus/minus to -2. Neither the Marlins nor Lospenov have mentioned each other since the silence began, but it is clear the message was sent and received. The only question that remains is: What was said?

LOSPENOV “UNLIKELY” TO RETURN TO MARLINS SAN DIEGO, CA – A day after offering an olive branch to his team to end the ongoing off-ice situation, San Diego Marlins defenseman Vanek Lospenov seems poised for an offseason in the free agent pool, according to his agent. Lospenov, 22, made headlines, yesterday, after offering to suppress his public cries of discontent with the Marlins’ front office and General Manager Thad Sales in a statement made by his agent Christian Gostlivic. Many, including Lospenov, were hoping for a subdued exchange between the two parties, but since asking for a meeting with the Marlins, Lospenov and Gostlivic have heard nothing but silence from the San Diego offices. “We offered to sit down, like grown-ups, and talk things through,” said Gostlivic. “The silence from the Marlins is heard, and it makes very clear the team’s position on the matter.” Gostlivic, who originally negotiated Lospenov’s contract renewal last offseason, stated: “At this point, we are tired of trying. We have looked into all the options that the team provided Mr. Lospenov with and have not found any of those options to be worthwhile without a conversation.” When asked if Lospenov was considering free agency when his contract expires at the end of this season, Gostlivic said: “All we know is that the Marlins don’t want Mr. Lospenov here, so I would say it’s unlikely he will be here next season.” Lospenov is coming off of a night with an assist and five blocks in the Marlins’ 6-2 loss against the Mississauga Hounds.

Looks like his agent is prepared to field offers at any moment...

LOSPENOV WANTS PEACE WITH MARLINS SAN DIEGO, CA – Embattled San Diego Marlins defenseman Vanek Lospenov wants to meet with his VHLM club face-to-face after a week of verbal and print warfare between the two sides. The peace offering comes after a week-long feud that saw the two parties accelerating apart after a police altercation involving Lospenov and his subsequent criticism of the Marlins and General Manager Thad Sale. Lospenov made sharp remarks about the departure of Sales for the VHLE at the end of the season, criticizing the general manager for his abandonment of the team and a failure to secure a future for the franchise. Sales and the Marlins clapped back on an episode of Inside the Fish Tank, the Marlins’ in-house podcast, stating that the team was disappointed in Lospenov, but it would not deal him away from the club. Tensions only increased after Sales made note that Lospenov had “not done anything” over the previous three seasons in San Diego. Lospenov, taking exception to the claims, took to Twitter to demand change, defend his numbers, and even burn his jersey from his first season in San Diego, a move which seemingly ended the Russian’s stay. Monday morning, however, brought about a new chapter to the ongoing saga, as Lospenov’s agent, Christian Gostlivic, broke the silence after a tense yet quiet weekend. “Vanek wants to be in San Diego,” said Gostlivic. “With that said, we have had no choice but to formally submit a trade request to the Marlins. While a trade is not the desired option, it must be considered if the Marlins cannot reach an agreement with my client or, at least, take into consideration his concerns over the direction of the team.” Gostlivic further detailed Lospenov’s position: “San Diego is home for Vanek. He loves the city, and he loves this team. All he asks is that the Marlins meet with us to consider the concerns of the organization’s second longest tenured player with more than 200 games. Vanek has a career to look after, as does every player here, and he wants that career to end with him playing in the VHL. The fear is that, unless the Marlins make additions to the blueline, the Vanek’s development and the team’s chances to contend for the cup will be impeded.” While this may prove to be a calming of the storm, there still is a large cloud looming in the distance. After the Season 79 conclusion, whenever that may be for the Marlins, Lospenov is set to become a free agent. With tension reaching the levels they have this last week, it is questionable if this peace offering is simply a temporary fix for Lospenov. The 22-year old could experiment with the free agent market, leaving San Diego with nothing in return. The Yukon Rush are frontrunners as a potential landing spot for Lospenov, as the team has twice offered and twice been rejected by the defenseman despite series consideration. While there has not been a response, yet, from the Marlins, it can be assumed that there will be one in the coming hours. This is a developing story.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Thursday, August 5, 2021 LOSPENOV, MARLINS, HAVE OFF-ICE ISSUES AS RUSSIAN CALLS OUT GM The San Diego Marlins, again, find themselves dealing with a re-surfaced problem; The Vanek Lospenov problem. Lospenov, the 22-year old, Penza, RU native, garnered attention this week following the Marlins’ 4-3 road victory against the Minnesota Storm. According to TMZ Sports, who first reported the story, Lospenov attended The Loft, a night club on Hennepin Avenue in Minneapolis, following the team’s victory on Friday night. The Marlins defenseman came into an altercation with an unidentified male and proceeded to assault the man with his shoe. Minneapolis Police arrived on the scene, shortly after, to find Lospenov shouting at the man in Russian and, additionally, exclaiming, “I’m Mike Millbury, *expletive.” Lospenov was apprehended by police and taken to Hennepin County Prison, where his toxicology report came back negative for illegal substances. Lospenov was cited for public intoxication and misdemeanor assault. “Vanek was using self-defense actions during the initial altercation which transitioned to a struggle for composure as the event continue,” said Lospenov’s agent, Christian Gostlivic. “A discussion over Lospenov’s concern for the future of the Marlins organization and the announcement of Thadthrasher’s departure from the role of General Manager at the end of the season led to the events that transpired.” This is not the first mention of Lospenov’s discontent with the direction of the Marlins, as the Russian spoke with the Down South Podcast: “We all know our need, and [Thadthrasher] hasn’t made the moves,” said Lospenov to the podcast which covers SPHL hockey. “He’s a great GM, but, with him leaving, we need to win now.” San Diego and Thadthrasher declined to comment on the matter, stating that the team is looking into the events.

+10 Vanek Lospenov

LOSPENOV EYES VHL MOVE AFTER SPHL SUSPENDS PENZA, RUS – After a standout pair of seasons in the SPHL with the Peoria Rivermen, Russian-born defenseman Vanek Lospenov is looking for a new home in the VHL after the Rivermen suspended operations for the 2020-21 season in late September. The 22-year old Penza native amassed an impressive 197 hits during his final season in Peoria, good enough for the top mark in the SPHL. When the hits weren’t flying, Lospenov earned black and blue marks from many of his 103 blocked shots, including the Natan Wallik slap shot that left him sidelined for three games last December. “I’ve always wanted make the jump to the VHL,” said Lospenov. “My goal is the same as every young skater; play as long as I can and win a cup.” The North American style of play of the VHL will be nothing new to the blueliner, as he has already spent a large portion of his playing career in the states. At 15, Lospenov made the move from his native country to join the Colorado Rampage 16U AAA in the Tier 1 Elite Hockey League (T1EHL) before making the jump to juniors. After a tender from the Aberdeen Wings of the NAHL, Lospenov spent two seasons with the organization, winning the Robertson Cup in 2016. “The NAHL is very much like the VHL but at a junior level,” said Lospenov. “Every team is competitive, and if you are not at your best, you’ll find yourself looking for work.” Following his tenure in Aberdeen, Lospenov was selected in the 5th round of the USHL Draft by the Sioux City Musketeers, who he would play two seasons for, winning the league’s Best Defenseman honors in 2018. Following his junior career’s end, the Russian remained in the states signing a 1-year deal with Peoria. After just 16 games, the then 21-year old saw his season cut short when he suffered post-concussion syndrome from a collision with the boards. The next season, after signing a 3-year extension, Lospenov recorded 4 goals and 24 assists to help the Rivermen finish atop the league with 71 points at the time of the suspension of play. “I think I had a lot of momentum at the time the league stopped play,” he said. “I kept that rolling during the quarantine period, and I hope it translates on the ice.” With his agent, Tomas Javilaoux, leading the charge, Lospenov has already garnered the eyes of VHL scouts and general managers and hopes to join an organization in the coming days. Halifax and Minnesota have both expressed interest with Halifax giving more of a passing look, as a defenseman is outside of their immediate needs. “I’m humbled to have been in conversations with multiple teams about the opportunity to join them,” Lospenov said. “Whatever color jersey and whatever logo I wear, I will play with my whole heart for that organization and bring them a cup.” With the season already in full swing, Lospenov will be called upon to fill a gap on whatever team he signs with, likely as a bottom six pairing. A veteran partner may be necessary for the 22-year old to follow and learn the VHL ropes from, so look for contenders with veteran D-men to join the sweepstakes for the youngster

Accepted

1. After my organization closed its doors for the season due to the pandemic, I knew I could not wait for the next season without playing. At my age, there is still room for growth, and I need to be on the ice in a competitive for as much as I can. 2. I think it is as simple as my position. I'm naturally big-bodied, and I know use that to my advantage. I see the puck through the zone very well and use my skating to my advantage against smaller bodied forwards. 3. I'm young, there is no denying that. The leap from Juniors to the SPHL was a change, but the jump to the VHL is drastically different. I need to learn to be offensive. My 200 foot game lacks and I need to improve on attack. 4. Defensive. I think that's clear. I don't play to show off, I play to stop the players that do. 5. Waterloo. The OT winner. No doubt in my mind. We were down, I want to say 3-1 in the third, come back and in the OT I lost my man and jumped into the high slot for the winner. I don't know if I'm allowed back in that building. 6. Lots. Too many. The people at Bauer love me because we keep spending money on new sticks. I've experimented with a few new manufacturers in the off weeks this year and I hope that the new CCM Ultra Tack is the solution for me. спасибо и благослови бог!

Yes, he recruited me