twists

free teeps pog

1. I think our MVP is you Steve 2. None, because we didn't beat many lol. 3. I don't really know. I'm notoriously difficult to buy for since I just buy the things I want/need myself 4. The euro division is always a cluster fuck during the playoffs so probably most of them happen there 5. Hmm, not especially. I can't say I've made an effort to watch any 6. I actually have no idea what Christmas dinner is looking like this year. My mom will do Eve, and my gf's parents will do day.

Damn my declaration of love is only worth $500!?!?!

Apparently trolling Spartan and gassing up Grape is my new vhl.com meta

Yeah, yeah. I was going for the most blatantly untrue points for humor value

Damn why you gotta come in here with your facts lmao

Reasons why Grape should take over as Moscow GM As we all know Spartan is very good at losing and I don't think Putin likes that very much. In a previous article I wrote about why he should be fired. I've found the perfect replacement, I think we should hire Grape. Here are my reasons why: 1. He actually wins in the VHLM. Our lord and savior Grape consistently has good results in the VHLM, without having to "rebuild" like our current GM Spartan. Rebuilding is only for losers and thus Grape gains the edge here. 2. Grape is seen as a leader in our locker room. Unlike Spartan, Grape provides valuable intel and feedback to players looking to improve. Spartan barely posts anything in our locker room and that leaves it almost completely devoid of activity. 3. Grape can actually commit time to the team. Unlike Spartan who holds like 3 or 4 jobs, Grape can focus solely on our team and make sure we have a winning atmosphere. Spartan is currently too busy being Grape's boss to actually run our team properly. @Grape

Sorry it was all supposed to be read in sarcasm. I didn't realize how much shit Moon and others had been getting. Bad timing, and I'm sorry @Moon

*angy twists complained here*

can’t believe I’m not tbh

it was a joke chill

EVERYONE BLAME @Moon!

cry

I got more total points than you

1. Well the Red Wings have Patrick Kane now...so that's weird as hell 2. I don't know I haven't paid any attention to the M or its players lol 3. Well, I had a great season for how average my player is. 55 points is great for my d man 4. Holiday season baby! Christmas decorations are going up this weekend (I'm late but was on vacation all of Thanksgiving) 5. yes, hes the best loser 6. $ucideboy$

I'll GM leggo

I will tell every member of the VHL that has been active in the past week that I love them live on stream. I don't know how anyone could turn this down

1. I did, I ate at Veselka in NYC (an extremely authentic Ukrainian restaurant). Absolute goat place to eat 2. Dude I bought so much shit I don't want to talk about it, but everyone's christmas presents are taken care of 3. I love losing its actually the best thing ever 4. Yeah, that Spart's mom isn't #1 5. I wish I could tell you that, but Spartan refuses to tell me what I should invest my TPE into 6. MAX VERSTAPPEN

@Moon

Jason why didn't you give me the job smh

week 3 claim tehe >.< uwu

I have been trying to figure out why Moscow has been so bad this season and I think I have finally figured out why. @Spartan is our GM. There’s no worse GM in the entire VHL than him. Has he ever won a cup? Of course not. He’s had the best teams that the VHL has ever seen and he can’t even win a continental cup? Who is this guy. Even I, the reigning inactive champion, have a cup. The Victator brought many wins to Moscow, but Spartan threw all of those in the toilet when he took over. There’s only one true GM that should be overseeing Moscow, and that is @Grape. He might actually bring us some wins. My sources tell me that Putin has lost all faith in Spartan, meaning his life expectancy is probably about 4 more days. Why the blues continue to allow this abomination of a GM to continue working in the VHL is beyond me. Something has to give at this point. Even @Steve our AGM has been complaining about our losses. I humbly ask @Beketov to remove Spartan as a GM and to install Grape in his place. Thank you for listening to my Ted talk and I hope you all learned that Spartan is the worst GM ever. K thanks baiiiii

Okay that's asking too much

I asked ChatGPT to fix our recruitment issues and this is what I got Preface: I am not copy pasting an article that ChatGPT wrote here, I am instead going to cover the actual good ideas it suggested to help recruiting. 1. Engaging Social Media Presence: This will not come as a shock, but in this section ChatGPT discussed much of what Z suggested in his original post. The only thing it brought up that I hadn't thought of was sharing "behind-the-scenes" activities on social media. It would actually be super interesting to hear a teams war room audio (even if only 30 second bytes) before a draft, or a funny screenshot from the blues discord, etc. 2. Interactive Website and Forums: This section described what we already have, a forum that allows players to interact, encourage engagement, etc. It did suggest one thing that gave me pause though. It suggested a mentor program for newer members that would help them stay active. I thought this was a great idea, but I'm not sure on the feasibility of enacting it. I don't think it would have to last more than a week or two, but even for a newbie to have someone they can turn to when they don't know what to do would be nice. This is kinda the VHLM GM job, but maybe a more solid one-to-one program would be more effective. 3. Promotional Events and Tournaments: This section basically described our world cup and world junior cup tournaments. This is a hot take, but if we incentivized those further with some TPE for the winners they would be dramatically more effective at keeping people engaged in the offseason. Another idea would be to introduce forum-related rewards such as an exclusive title for winning a championship, maybe you get to pick your username color for a month, etc. There's a bunch of small things that we could add in terms of forum customization for users that could keep people more engaged. Allow spending player store money on forum customizations perhaps? 4. Streamer and Content Creator Collaborations: So this was definitely an insane idea, but the gist was to make twitch drops for the VHL. We could go live on the official VHL twitch accounts and maybe giveaway TPE or some exclusive item that only the stream watchers would receive. I feel like a cool forum title is almost perfect for this. Or maybe player store money, etc. there's a lot of interesting ideas. 5. Referral Programs and Incentives: Oh look we already have this. I think there could definitely be revamp of our current system. It's passable, which is fine, but that also means there's room for improvement. I don't have a magic idea to improve our referral program, but there's gotta be something more we can do here. We really are doing the bare minimum lol. I do realize increasing/expanding this program could increase attempts at making multis, but we do actually seem to have a good handle on that. tl;dr: ChatGPT actually gave some decent recruitment ideas for the VHL and I summarized them in the points above.