ethanjaeda

"I treat it like EAS I hear it and start running for cover it's instinctual at this point. It's worse in text because she goes '¡Robin Mateo Sierra Martineau!', but I can't take it seriously because my name is so long the two exclamation points are in a long distance relationship ." -Robin

“Stop it Khan I’m blushing in a Chinese restaurant right now.” - Robin

Thanks! Glad to be here ^^

I thought it would be really rude to just tell Robin’s story as if it were my own, not saying if you do you’re rude or what have you—I just thought it’d be better if Robin told his own story in his own words. So I emailed him and asked precisely that, his own words. He sent me back this: “I don’t even know where to start, really. Cool I was born. Awesome. Great start. Okay, I’ll be more serious. I was born on June 18th, 2005, in—and this is the part that surprises people—in San Juan, Puerto Rico. Surprise, surprise. Hablo español con el acento puertorriqueño más fuerte conocido por el hombre. My mom was visiting family in New York and my dad was vacationing in NYC from Montréal when they met. My full name is Robin Mateo Sierra Martineau. I used Mateo Sierra when I was in Puerto Rico or visiting relatives in New York, and I used Robin Martineau when I was in Canada. Not because I was forced to, but when I was younger I didn’t like how in Spanish my name is Robín (ro-bean), rather than Robin (rah-ben) in English. I stopped caring when I was like…thirteen, but it’s not that important. If you’re cool enough you can call me Mateo, it’s still my name, but if you’re some random person on the street don’t call me Mateo. But if you’re a teammate you can call me Mateo. It's like calling someone named ‘John’ Johnny. It’s a personal thing. I spent half of the year in San Juan and the rest in Montréal, and then later Toronto. I would be in Canada during prime hockey season, and then I’d come back to Puerto Rico to root for the Habs or the Leafs in the playoffs from Hato Rey. My dad would ramble for hours and hours about hockey. Honestly I’d set him off so he’d order us pizza. (But don’t tell him that.) He would tell me the stories of Wayne Gretzky, Lemieux, how much he hated the Avs for taking the Nordiques, how ‘this was the year the Leafs were going to take the cup!’…and then they didn’t. I started on my elementary school’s hockey team, and then in Puerto Rico I’d play a mix of both inline hockey and ice hockey, since Puerto Rico had the only ice rink in the Caribbean. Me and my mom would drive two hours from San Juan to this little city called Aguadilla at the complete ass crack of dawn so I could spend the entire Saturday there. I’d play hockey by myself, without a goal, so I’d just make up an arbitrary spot where I wanted the puck to go. I got told off once since the puck would leave black marks on the wall where I shot. I’d show up when they’d open and left when they closed. They started calling me ‘La Hoja’ when I’d show up, since the jacket I’d wear had a Canadian flag stitched on the side of it. Then Hurricane Maria hit. I don’t know why I’m being so dramatic about it, I wasn’t even there. I always left for Canada in July so it’d be easier to transition back into life in Canada. It hurts to think about how many things I saw for the last time and never knew about it. My mom stayed, and on the nineteenth of September she texted me. I’m not translating it because it makes me cry if I look at it too long. “Aunque me pase algo Mateo, siempre te querré. Siempre te amaré aunque ya no esté aquí. No te preocupes por mí.” I said: "¿qué pasa si te pasa algo?" She said: “En caso de que pase algo, patina para mí y te animaré desde las nubes :DD Pase lo que pase, todo estará bien. ” She lived, by the way. I felt like we were getting sad. She was scooping water out of the apartment with buckets. Apparently she used one of my old helmets when the buckets overflowed. When that failed she hid in the bathroom with things she cared about in a trash bag and our cat. A week later she sent me a text that said: “We’re okay!!! The apartment is a little soggy but I saved the things that mattered. Link (our cat) is mad at me for putting him in the [pet carrier] though xP” Anyway, she’s okay. She moved to Toronto with us for a few years after everything. Let’s move this back to hockey. I COMPLETELY forgot that’s what this was about. Obviously, after Maria I couldn’t go back to Puerto Rico, so I stayed in Puerto Rico and played essentially little league ice and inline hockey, the latter on a much more hobby basis during the summers, but that’s not important. I started playing Junior Hockey for a team out of Mississauga when I was…fourteen-ish? And I stayed with them for a few years, bounced to a different Junior Hockey team based in Toronto when I was sixteen so my parents could save money on gas. It’s all very vanilla. As time went on, though, I started to feel like I was giving everything to this game but this game was giving me nothing in return. Which, honestly, could’ve been me thinking I’m better than I was. But still, I wasn’t exactly happy with where my life was. So I had this plan where if I made it to University and nothing changed, my College Hockey career would be my last shot. Then, a break! Well, more like two. Firstly, I got an agent [Me! :D] who was able to put me into contact with the VHL. Then, a second break! I was contacted by a VHLM team who wanted an interview. My agent wrote back to them, and they never responded. I won’t name them to keep things copacetic. And because my agent begged me too. [Yes. Yes I did.] It was. Fine, it hurt a little, but it was more frustrating. Disappointing. I’m not sure of the word to use. It made me stop and really stop and think about hockey and my life in general. It just felt like I wasn’t going anywhere with my life. Like I was stuck in the same sweat-soaked jersey with Fairweathered teammates and disgusting locker rooms with bacterial, fungal, and parasitic strains and pathogens that would truly violate the Geneva Conventions. So I chose a date, and said that if nothing changed then I’d say ‘F[Agent Censor]k It All’ and I’d move on with my life and drop hockey like it never mattered to me. I think it was more out of anger, but I still think that it was the manifestation of an underlying issue. I think it was me just being tired. And then I was drafted by Halifax. So. Joke’s on me I guess. I think my mom was more excited than me, she screamed so loud Link freaked out and broke a plate and (somehow????) knocked a clock off of a wall. She cried, I [definitely] cried, fun for the whole family. Besides Link. One thing I want to bring up is the fact I dropped the ‘Martineau’ part from my jersey. Well, not only for space because French just LOVES to have silent letters for no reason, but remember how my mom put things she cared about in a trash bag during Hurricane Maria? One of those things was a pair of my old inline skates. She said she ‘didn’t want me to lose one more part of my home’ like she did. Yeah. I cried. Only a little. They’re behind me as I type this and I like to think of them as my good luck charms. The day she told me that was the day I decided to drop the ‘Martineau’ part of my name from my jersey. Not out of disrespect to my dad, to Canada, or to Québec, but out of respect to the island that the other half of me still lies. I wear ‘SIERRA’ so that maybe one kid in Bayamón, Aguadilla, Ponce, or hell even Mayagüez can see it and know this sport has a place for them. I think that’s it, really. I don’t really know what else to add. I’m sure my Agent will come up with something witty. Oh, actually, the date that I set passed a week ago. Cool. Yeah. RS97 Out.” I, the Agent, have nothing witty to add. This is awkward, thanks Robin. P.S. Robin ‘RS97 Out’ is BADASS, start doing that more k thx bye LETS GO 21ST!!!! Words: 1400+ (but like 1446. Maybe 1450 I’m not sure.)

Andrew Skilton, A.K.A the GOAT from Palmerston ONTARRIOOOOO I had this idea for a while, but wasn't sure how to...execute it or how to go about it, really. But it came out way better than I was honestly expecting :D! Took me. An unreasonable amount of time but it looks REALLY good in my very humble opinion. Also, there's a few Easter eggs in the photo itself, so brownie points to whoever gets it first! Here's everything broke down bc its kinda interesting: anyway. thats all -ethan

Why not, I'll apply

1.With the season coming to a close, what do you hope to accomplish before the season ends? "...Raise the cup, honestly. It'd be such a move to hoist the cup. But even if I don't hoist the cup, I've already accomplished so much more than I ever expected to. I'm here, and I think that's enough cup or not." 2. Is the Founder's Cup a two horse race between Ottawa and us? "...I really want to talk shit but I'm not going to and jinx the hell out of us." 3. What teammate had been the most have been the most underrated? "I don't hear a lot about Skilton, Shelby, or Reingard. They're all really solid and good players. And...Skilton's cute so he gets a pass." 4. What team are you looking forward to playing in the playoffs? "Saskatoon, for...reasons." 5. What is a hobby outside of hockey that your player enjoys? "I like reading, video games, normal Gen Z things, I guess. Ironically enough I collect Hockey Cards--Don't. Don't ask how many of myself I have just--just don't worry about it. I just want to make sure they get my likeness correct--" 6. With the NHL Playoffs underway, who is your pick to win it all? "I was born in Toronto, but I enjoy this thing called sanity. So the part of me born under Maple Leaves is rooting for Toronto, but the sensible part of me is rooting for the Oilers. I think my Agent is a Kraken fan, but...we know...we know how that went." "rude." - ethan, agent of Robin Sierra

i just REALLY like making these things they're so fun , if you look closely you'll see Helsinki City Centre, and I might start putting more easter eggs into my graphics bc it'll be funny i had this idea pop into my head while talking to the nice guys on the Helsinki Titans (@samx and @Triller), and I spent a stupid amount of time researching Finnish hockey only for it not really to matter in the end but HEY fuck it we groove btw while we're here STREAM GLORIA GROOVE!!!!! and Ana Lua Caiano and idk message me if you want non-english music recs bc I have them like pokemon cards okay I'm tired i'm going to bed GOODNIGHt. -ethan agent of robin sierra

This is based off of the time I bought the Las Vegas Aces and moved them to Quebec City. I made this version in French: Albeit I don't speak French let alone Quebecois French (ok je parle un peu але моя українська краща. ухххххх слухайте Ana Lua Caiano на Spotify, її музика чудова) so if it translates weirdly my apologies. idk why i talk so formally on here its really not that serious There's Lore I guess? There was an Expansion Draft, but I was too lazy to see how ACTUAL VHL(E/M) expansion drafts work so I just went based off of vibes. QUEBEC TALONS ROSTER - VHL VERSION: Connor Simard (Halifax 21st) Maple Dogwood (Halifax 21st) Cole Stermer (Houston Bulls) Johnny Tsunami (Houston Bulls) Nikita Yolishev (Las Vegas Aces) Eugene Ryanheart (Las Vegas Aces) Dakota Nachbaur (Mexico City Kings) Isaak Robinson (Miami Marauders) Aiden Paige (Miami Marauders) Taylor Swift (Mississauga Hounds) Matteo Stefano (Mississauga Hounds) Marek Nowaczyk (Ottawa Lynx) Jillian Woods (Ottawa Lynx) Staroseltsev Mikhail (Philadelphia Reapers) Magni Jinn (Philadelphia Reapers) Keith Perry (San Diego Marlins) Kevin Johnathen (San Diego Marlins) Austin Goulet lll (Saskatoon Wild) So. Yeah.

1. Welcome @Phil and hire new player to the team. What is exciting about the latest recruit? "It feels really good that I'm not the only new guy on the team anymore. It's less...isolating, if that makes sense. Not that I feel isolated, its just a me thing. I"m just excited to have someone else who's new on the team." 2. There was also a trade. A S95 1st rounder for S94 4th AND S95 2nd. Is this a good trade building for the future? "I think it's better for longevity, but honestly I just play the game. Logistics are for...everyone else but me, if that makes sense." 3. Should more have been done to load up for the Cup run? "...What else were we supposed to do? Steroids? I think we've been playing extremely well and we're currently top of the league--I think. Let me check." Robin Sierra proceeded to google the standings. "Second. We're second. Which is still good, and I'm happy with how the team and I have played." 4. What team made the biggest moves in this trade deadline? "Honestly no clue. I forgot trade deadlines were happening and totally didn't keep up with it." 5. What is the weirdest way you have been injured? "I got hit by a car in the parking lot going into practice once. I was more mad I got hit by a Ford, but then the next day I couldn't walk. So." 6. Which visiting team should I arrange hotel arrangements for? "...Philly? They seem alright."

+10 for Robin Sierra

1. "I think we have to just keep at it, y'know. We have a good core, and good players, and the drive, and soon enough I think the one point lead will be a distant memory." 2. "Good question, actually. Maybe Tommy Shelby? I'm not sure." 3. "Probably the Aces to either Hartford or Quebec City. I just hate Las Vegas." 4. "Knee pads?" 5. "I mean like, Halifax wasn't in the Line of Totality, so it was just kind of boring. I got the glasses and everything, went outside for three minutes, saw a wasp, and went back inside." 6. "I've always cut my stick tape with my skate to make sure its sharp enough. I don't even remember how it started, honestly."

Hoo Hoo.

me and the owner of the Las Vegas Aces got into a gambling match legally I can't divulge much but lets just say i didn't lose

1. So how did you celebrate the Easter holiday yesterday? "Nothing, really. Listened to Madison Beer. That's it." 2. Today is indeed April's Fools Day. What is the greatest prank you fell for or pulled off? "I dyed Andrew Skillton's @ace_five_ laces with glow-in-the-dark ink but I don't know if he's noticed yet." 3. What is your response to the recent embezzlement scandal? "Horrible people will be horrible people." 4. Which Western Conference is more of a threat to us, Vegas Aces or Houston Bulls? "...One is a paper card the other is a deadly animal." 5. Is Pombo already a lock for S93 VHLM MVP or will someone else(most likely Maple Dogwood) win this award? "I'm rooting for Dogwood, personally. Don't tell him I said that though." 6. Alexandr Novotny @Patrik Tallinder has been racking up the assist. How important has his passing ability been to the team? "It's been immensely helpful on the ice. It adds a dynamic aspect to our offence, which I really like."

1. Currently, we are tied for first in the Eastern Conference. What has been the highlights for you so far? "There's a lot, actually. This being my inaugural season in the VHLM has been special, I've been enjoying that part, but I've enjoyed being apart of this team. I've really enjoyed finding my footing while everyone else is at the start of the season. That's probably been the highlight for me." 2. Maple Dogwood @dogwoodmaple has been the driving force so far with 15 points in 12 games. What driven him to this hit start? "His talent, his love for the game, I'm not sure. I'm not him, so your guess is as good as mine." 3. Who do you feel is going to be our biggest rivals this season? "Ottawa, probably. We don't have to worry about Miami, so I'd say Ottawa." 4. What is your favourite non NHL team? "Coachella Valley Firebirds." 5. What was the crazier sport event this month; NHL Trade Deadline, NHL Offseason Free Agency, or March Madness? "NHL Trade Deadline, I'd say." 6. Where do you eat to celebrate something good or special? "There's this little restaurant called 'Broth House' in Halifax that's really good. I have to get the team out there one day."

...What font did you use for the teams so I can steal them lmao

Thanks! Every part of this is hand-made. Here's a version with all the layers separated: My thing with the Halifax logo is that imo the colour theory would be off. To counteract this, the city you see in the breakdown is Halifax. It's also where Pier 21 is located, granted you can't see it in the finished image. Also, with Sierra's signature, I took a lot of inspiration from Seattle Kraken's announcement of Vince Dunn agreeing to terms, and that includes his player signature (for like jerseys and pucks and stuff), and I thought that would be really cool for Sierra to do.

The font is called "Black Junkiest" btw

I made this in inkscape. idk what else to put. Claiming for 03/17/24