Jump to content

New stat to be introduced to VHL?


Tagger

Recommended Posts

In a move that would make what is already a super-long stat-line even longer, a movement has been proposed by current Calgary Wranglers defenseman Edwin Encarnacion (who is still employed somehow) to introduce a new statistic for the VHL’s fortieth season. Below is the proposition as written by Encarnacion:

 

Goalie Sacks

 

Currently, it is evidently clear that hockey players in the VHL are currently not being appropriately acknowledged by their peers for bringing down the opposing team’s goalie, an act that one would deem crucial to the success of any hockey team (along with a higher possession of the penalty box than their opposition). Therefore, we feel it integral to the spirit of the game that we install a statistic that records this stat for the following reasons:

 

1)      While past greats of the Goalie Sack such as Da’Brickashaw O’Neal and Hiro Renomitsu are no longer in a position to have their feats recorded, by installing this statistic now, after another forty seasons, we would be accurately able to retell the tale of the greatest Goalie Sack artists from Season 40 onwards.

2)      This would allow us to break sporting history by allowing us to compare stats between two different professional sport leagues in the NFL and the VHL. To do that, we simply divide a VHL player’s total Goalie Sack count by 4.5 in order to accurately reflect the number of games played in an NFL season, and thus comparisons can be made to see who is, truly, the greatest sack artist in all of sports.

3)      It would encourage people to fuck up Brick Wahl. We will give two sacks for every one sack on Wahl because he can go eat a dick, straight up.

 

 

The idea has actually gained support from Davos Captain Thomas Landry, who said:

 

“This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard…let’s do it!”

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I feel Renomitsu needs to be recognised as the greatest of all-time and I feel this would hinder his status.

Hiro Renomitsu -> 2.79 PIMs PG

Edwin Encarnacion - > 3.14 PIMs PG

 

#JustSayingIsAll

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I feel Renomitsu needs to be recognised as the greatest of all-time and I feel this would hinder his status.

Go back and watch the tape of his play, then make a decision on Renomitsu. Just don't make one decision, then go back and watch the tape , then suddenly decide you have to correct the error-filled first decision by making a new one.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...