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Thunder’s Wordcast for the Impaired Podcaster - 2023/Episode 1


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It’s a new year, a new season, and time for a new episode of Thunder’s wordcast for the impaired podcaster.  Who knows, 2023 could be the year that Thunder’s balls drops and he actually does a podcast instead of these wordcasts.  To start the 2023 wordcast, the topics are going to include:  past season takes, off-season boredom, predictions, and of course, Brian Payne.  What wordcast could be done without mentioning him, but this might surprise you.

 

Starting with the VHLM, congratulations goes out to the San Diego Marlins.  It should have been a no brainer for me to predict the Marlins to win it all, considering they ended the season with a +96 goal differential.  The only thing is that I have a soft spot for Mexico City and GM Cole, @badcolethetitan, has continued to amaze me with decision making with the Mexico roster.  I truly expected Mexico City to stomp San Diego in the semi’s but that never happened.  And it never donned on me that their star defenseman was none other than David Jokinen, @Ahma.  Ahma is a Davos legend and was instrumental in any success Jake Thunder has had at Davos, even after retiring, Ahma helped with encouragement and advice.

 

I also have to give Ahma credit for my continued interest in podcasts, even though I haven’t done one yet, as Ahma is quite skilled with podcasting.  Every season he and Frostbeard do a lengthy podcast doing a recap of the previous season.  We are due to be hearing one from them soon, I hope.

 

Oslo Storm took home the VHLE trophy again.  This one was a surprise to me, but it shouldn’t have been.  @JB123 is a super GM and I should have had more confidence in Oslo’s success, but when Cologne finishes the season with a +112 goal differential, I gotta say it battled with my feeble brain coming up with someone other than Cologne.  And to consider it was Rome who played Oslo in the finals, was an even stranger event.  I’m not sure what’s going to happen to Oreo McFleury, but I can venture to bet that McFleury is going to shine in the VHL.

 

Now onto the VHL, where all season I secretly wanted Davos to win it all, but didn’t want to jinx us by predicting us to win.  Looking at the other teams, something told me to put Chicago on the forefront, mostly because of Shindigs.  @Shindigs had a dynamite season and gave me some good points in fantasy.  It was an easy choice to pick Chicago, since I couldn’t pick Davos.

 

And talking about a jinx, the one time I step out on the ledge and pick Davos to advance in the playoffs, is the time we get our ass kicked by Prague.  And to top it all off Prague goes into the finals against Vancouver and loses.  It could have been Davos.  Of course, it could have been Moscow or Warsaw for that matter.  All of the teams were capable of representing the European Division.

 

But Vancouver?  They proved to be the best in the VHL when it was all said and done.  Chicago, Calgary, and DC finished higher than Vancouver in the regular season.  It just goes to show you that season hockey and play off hockey are two different games.  Apparently Vancouver players can grow much better beards.

 

On to the next topic.  It’s off-season time.  Once the playoffs are over, there seems to be quite a lull in activity for me to wrap my fingers on.  The pro/am is always something fun to look forward to but that goes by quickly.  And then there is always the podcasts, but those seem to be quiet these days.  I have purposefully delayed listening to two podcasts so I can listen to them tomorrow while I’m on the road.  The next big exciting thing coming up is the World Cup.

 

Regarding the World Cup, I finally learned that it doesnt start until the 18th.  So for about five days, I checked discord and the forum about a hundred times looking for scores, hoping to see some game results.  Now that I know its the 18th, I only look on discord and the forum around twenty times a day for new information.  I have already checked out the rosters of other teams and as much as I want to say how good Team USA is, I dont want to jinx us!  This will be the first chance that Jake Thunder gets to play on the same team as Brian Payne.  That being said, don’t expect any shit talk about the light fingered defender who is too afraid to drop the gloves against Thunder, until after the World Cup.

 

The drafts are in progress right now.  I must say that the live draft I listened to when I first joined was quite exciting, even though I didn’t get drafted in the VHLM.  It wasnt until the draft was over that I got to interact with potential teams.  I’m not sure what is going on with this draft, but it seems to be taking quite a long time.  Cole has been working on Mexico City draft selections for days, waiting for a turn to make a selection.

 

Alex wrote an article predicting the VHL draft and I gotta say, his information seems to have quite a bit of merit.  I especially like his prediction that David Jokinen will be drafted by Davos.  Here’s hoping Jokinen makes it that deep into the draft.

 

The next topic is my predictions for season 87.  I’m going to start with the VHLM.  Last season, it was clear that the top team in the season wins it all, but I’m going back out on that limb and I’m going to predict this is the season for Mexico City to win the championship.  I’m not sure how well they will do in the season, but GM Cole has some experience and he’s come up with some ingenious decisions throughout the seasons to help the team.  I know he’s thinking two and three steps ahead to take the Kings to the championship and I believe this is the season he does it.

 

Can Oslo three-peat?  I am predicting them to do it.  Cologne invested everything they have to dominate the season only to fall in the playoffs, while Oslo was consistent all season and did their dominating in the playoffs.  All you have to do is pay close attention to the Oslo mascot and you’ll see they do playoff beards to a new limit.  They have to win it again.

 

Without going to deep into the prediction for the VHL championship, I will keep it right to the point.  HC Davos has all the talent in the world to make it this season and bring home the trophy.  The forwards are steadily getting more pucks in the net and the defense is lining up to be solid, especially if David Jokinen joins the team.  And of course, there’s no getting around the best goalie in the league in Xavier Booberry, will be in net once again this season.  All three of you reading this who want to say, “Wait a minute here, no way Davos is going to win it,” just remember who’s the GM for Davos, Alex.  @Alex studies all you opponents like no other and has a schematic set up to isolate your strengths and turn them into a weakness.  So expect to get your ass kicked!

 

With the predictions over, I’m left with one more topic.  You got it, Brian Payne.  But this isn’t going to be a shit talk of Payne, or @Scurvy.  He’s my teammate on Team USA, so my comments are going to be favorable.  If you want the shit talk, you’ll have to wait until the World Cup is over and I can get back to trashing him and his Warsaw Predators.

 

Let’s talk about Brian Payne’s skills.  I can describe it in three words, “He’s a beast.”  He prides himself in being a bone crusher and punisher.  He averages 246 hits per season.  That is an impressive number, and he is currently ranked 4th on the Warsaw all time list.  And that is with fewer games played than the top three on the list.  If Payne keeps up this pace, he will be Warsaw’s leader sometime in season 88.

 

Looking at the Warsaw leaderboard, Brian Payne is currently ranked 3rd in shots blocked.  This impressive number bolsters Payne’s description of a solid defenseman.  And when you add the fact that he’s ranked second in the plus/minus category, its easy to see why Brian Payne is the top defenseman in the league.

 

Looking at all of these stats, one can’t help but being impressed with the overall play by Payne, especially considering that in four seasons with Warsaw, he has been in the penalty box about 19.4% of the time.  He’s a consistent leader in PIMS, and competes at the top of his game.  I’m not sure, but something tells me that he would be off the chart if he didn’t spend so much time in the sin bin.  But, that’s what makes him a complete player.

 

Now, I read a recent article by Scurvy and smiled at the comment that he couldn’t hold out any longer and updated his TPE.  I had to jump on and see what he did to improve himself, because I’m not sure how much more room for improvement there is.  Judging by the recent additions to his attributes, you can expect Brian Payne to call the penalty box home!  He’s definitely going to be getting a few more hits, shots blocked, and even his fighting as bumped up to a respectable level.  Given the current status of Payne’s attributes, I’m going to predict that he engages in some fighting more often as well as winning the fights.  His scoring attribute is through the roof and he’s likely to lead all defensemen in goals this season.  For those who play fantasy, you might want to select Brian Payne in the first round.  Pay attention @ScottyP, because you can learn from scurvy!

 

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Review: very nice article I enjoyed it and it is written in a way that you could almost perform it as a podcast. I sense a bit of bias in your writing but there is nothing wrong with that. Only negative would be I think it was a touch long for the content you had. 9/10

 

Also if you ever want any help with podcasts let me know I will happily jump in a call with you one day if you need it. Personally the easiest way to start is a q&a and start with a VHL.com podcast. I'm always here if you need help.

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10 hours ago, Berocka said:

Also if you ever want any help with podcasts let me know I will happily jump in a call with you one day if you need it. Personally the easiest way to start is a q&a and start with a VHL.com podcast. I'm always here if you need help.

I may be taking you up on it.  Thx

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