Ambrose Stark [Bio] [2/2]

[Banackock 7,680]

Ambrose Stark: Biography

I feel as though you shouldn't read this if you've never seen the show and want to. ZERO Spoilers from S6-8 basically. Maybe a tad earlier idk. 

Spoiler

The name blasts an echo among the walls of the corridors - the ones lost so many battles ago. The open flames burn bright now in the North and they do so proudly as the Stark house and friends have defended and built ever so powerfully in the place of Winterfell and surrounding areas. Things seem good now, but things haven't always been this way. There's times in history of Westoros - dark times that often challenged those of lived in Winterfell. Whether it be the Targaryen family claiming stake to the thrones, the Lannister family never fully fulfilling their debts and officially having a poor credit rating with the Bank of Winterfell which thus affects Winterfell's economy and throws them into a recession or other deadly battles with powerful forces made of nightmares, pig blood and evil shit. For this Biography does not have the greatest of starts.

 

It was early morning of Westoros Rock fest - Robb Stark and Talisa Stark take a vacation from their strategizing of war to enjoy some personal time. They party hard, they enjoy the music, they drop some magic mushrooms given to them from some Dothraki biker gangs and danced until the stars came out and the sun came back up. That night, things got freaky inside the tent and 9 months later, you have Ambrose Stark - technically. But during these 9 months, things grew darker. War was everywhere now. Wherever you looked, fired blazed and death tore through the lanes - missing nothing in sight. The people grew scared and the Stark House grew agitated. The Lannister family approached from the South and immediate action were required. The Stark family, led by Father Robb, gathered their Bannerman, friends and family - set on a war path with the Targaryen's. Numerous battles had taken place and much blood had spilled each day of battle. Soon, the Starks began to push the Lannisters back. The Starks grew less cautious. Allies were everywhere, but so were their enemies. 

 

They decided to celebrate - the King of the North has found love. The Hall was filled with purple flowers and those involved in the wedding parties matched the color. The theme was apparently purple, so it goes down forever written in the books of Westoros history as the purple wedding - a night that will never be forgotten. The drinks were flowing because the Starks held an open bar. Flying off the shelves were the Starks craft Beer, Dire. Everyone was fucked up but one family, the Trumps, sat quietly waiting with their men acting suspicious as fuck (everyone was too buzzed to notice weird af stuff). As the clock strikes minute, a Kongo lined formed at the back of the room and made it's way onto the dance floor. In the lead, Robb and Talisa Stark. Out of nowhere, Donald Trump - house of Trump and son of Penisentron Trump, ran at the newlyweds with a wooden knife used for carving pancakes. He sliced them open, blood squirting out like a fire hydrant that had just recently been hit by a Honda Civic, and his men opened fire on those fighting for the North. Not a single person survived except for the Asian caterers who brought the food and the DJ who was providing entertainment. But that night, a secret was soon to be revealed.. Tails Stark was pregnant with I guess a human baby. As the fighting stopped, eventually the Trump's and their allies left and out came Grandma Stark, hiding in the bathroom closet. She rescued Ambrose Stark and took him back to Winterfell. 

 

A peace treaty was eventually signed with Winterfell and the House of Trump and a few short months later, House Trump fell from grace as the Lannister family took back the throne and crowned Tyrion king of Westoros and seat warmer of the Iron Throne. For young Ambrose, this stuff was okay. His 3 older brothers are those who remain ahead of him for becoming Lord of Winterfell and he's totally okay with this. Growing up without parents was an extremely hard thing to do, but the family and children made it through as their nana kept great care of them. You know how Grandma's cook and love, so you know these kids were going to be something special. Especially because of their last name and the abilities and kick ass magic that comes with it. As he grew up, grandma had Ambrose learning all types of things. Sword Fighting, carpentry, horse back riding, gardening, and  of course, the game of hockey. Every few years, Winterfell now gets crazy ass winters - so they definitely don't have to wait as long for them as they used to. It's because Arya, Aunt to Ambrose Stark, managed to file a lawsuit against the night king which prevented him from controlling the mystical thing known to the people of Westoros as "Climate Change" or "Global Warming". 

 

This allowed young Ambrose Stark to perfect the art he knew as Hockey. Every day when Winter had come, you could find him on the ice behind the pig barn, skating circles around Forrest Hodor, son of Hodor (apparently, he got down and dirty quite often), who was Ambrose's best friend. He'd line the pucks up on the ice, all 3 of them, and fired them against the pig barn. He'd create weird little doll structures out of hay and his uncle Reggie's clothes and pretend it was the Lannister team. Sometimes shit got crazy in hockey for him because kids would put replica "needle" swords taped on their sticks, hidden away from the refs, and slice little homies open during games. Ambrose was one of the lucky ones to never have been sliced. He played for the Winterfell Direwolves and manned to blue line for the squad. He was selected 3rd overall by the team in the 111th season of the Westoros Hockey League. Through his time with the league, he played in 3 seasons before announcing his eligibility for the VHLM. During those seasons, he played in 150 games, totalling 67 goals, 83 assists and 150 points to hit a point per game right on the dot. Amazingly, he also had 297 blocked shots and 731 hits. The team made it to the finals 2 times during his 3 years, but never could quite finish it off. In 38 playoff games, he had 13 goals, 21 assists and 34 points. 

 

1,068 words. That was one of the toughest ones I've ever written. Thank god that's over with. +10 Ambrose Stark. 

[Dil 1,744]

bust

[Banackock 7,680]

2 minutes ago, DilIsPickle said:

bust

110%

[Gustav 6,139]

You forgot the "On May 5th, 2019, Stark signed with the Mississauga Hounds."

[Walter Fizz 84]

When you haven’t seen S8

 

[fonziGG 1,065]

Review:

Thank you for the disclaimer at the top, I don't happen to watch GoT (just because I don't want to be super addicted pls no hate comments <3) but it was incredibly creative and well thought-out. I definitely enjoyed reading this one and it made me laugh at times. 10/10 would read again.

[Banackock 7,680]

15 hours ago, Walter Fizz said:

When you haven’t seen S8

 

THERE NO SPOILERS IN THERE FROM THEN, pa. 

 

 

but watch S8. it good.