fyo

That's a bummer that you got DDoSed. I never looked back after the last time I signed in back when I was around. I didn't hate the VHL nor want to destroy it at any point. I worked hard on the website and, even standing alone as its own technical work, I was proud of it. I wouldn't have wanted to destroy it and I didn't have anything to do with that. But the fact that I'm a suspect is pretty telling of the kind of legacy I left here. EDIT TO ADD: I am guilty of leaving without telling anyone how it worked really. The website was actually a shitty, undocumented fork of the official STHS portal that I combined with some custom PHP integrations in SMF (our forum software for the second site). Once I figured out how to access the portal database from the site, I was able to do a lot of cool things (like the new finance system we had that was built into the site, and some of the stats tables that were directly embedded In the forum). I wasn't a compsci student and the website was a hobby project with a lot of code hygiene issues, and so leaving without any kind of handoff or documentation was shitty. I did get one or two emails from jardy that I answered whenever a big issue came up, but I did put those guys in a really tough spot by not doing any kind of knowledge transfer or having any documentation.

It's me, Fyodorov/NickBarr from back in the day. I'm glad to see this place is still going. I may have been this place's worst member ever. I was a huge jerk when I played here. No excuses. I was just really immature and not really very socially adjusted, and had a lot of my own demons that I think I took out on others. I simultaneously loved this place and got really into it, but at the same time, I think it was a bit of an escape for me in a negative way. You could probably tell from how I acted at the time, but i wasn't very popular in real life and didn't have many friends. I thought I wasn't popular in reality, so I could be popular on here by helping out and being active. The truth was, I was just disliked online or offline because I was a huge asshole. Truly. You probably won't be surprised to hear that this wasn't the first online community around that time period (2009-2012) where I ended up wearing out my welcome. The common denominator was me. Looking back as an adult, I cringe pretty hard at who I was back in university, and am sorry for being such a huge jerk. I know I left this place in a pretty shitty spot when I disappeared after taking over a team and moving the website. I think I was just acutely aware of how much I had been disliked, and how much my own actions and the way I had behaved were to blame, and just stopped signing in one day out of shame. That's the shittiest and most selfish thing I did, leaving like that and jeopardizing the hard work that went into the site by leaving the guys like Sterling (still remember going to that baseball game), Knight, Jardy (not sure if they're still here) in the lurch. I was much younger and stupider than I like to think I am now, but still old enough at the time to know better. Those guys especially didn't deserve that for all the hard work they put into this place. It's bothered me for years that I was such a piece of shit to people around here, especially how I exited, and I wanted to get this off my chest. I'm sorry for what I did and how I was. This isn't a comeback post - I unfortunately don't really have space for VHL in my life (nor would I expect to be welcomed back, even if I did), but I'm happy to see this place is going strong. If you played here in 2009-2012 and I made your experience negative at some point (thinking of Kendrick in particular - not sure if he's around or if he remembers me but I really gave that guy a lot of shit for some reason, to the point where it was excessive), I'm really sorry for that too. Whether I knew you or not, hope life is going well and you're all staying safe. It's not much and it doesn't make up for the things I outlined above, but I kicked in a small donation for the league. Cheers.