lemonan

1. It was a major disappointment, and I wish that we could be competing in the finals this year, but all that means is that I wasn't good enough to win. Gotta get on the grind and get better. 2. It's finally time: Marshall Maxx is going to hit HARD. People are not going to survive his checks next season. 3. While the team did well and the locker room was awesome, it was pretty clear by the end of the season that Maxx didn't fit the team's playstyle. I had a fun time, but I'm excited to see what he can do in a scheme more specific to his traits. 4. Yo! Good job! It was a great season here in San Diego, probably the best team in the city for years, so props for that! 5. Portal 2. 10/10. 6. Tuna. Don't make fun of me for loving tuna.

If it were ten days ago, I would have told you that the San Diego Marlins had no chance of winning the championship. As an underdog team against what was clearly the best team in the VHLM playoffs in the Ottawa Lynx, I could not imagine that they would be where they are today. That's right, the Marlins have put the utterly dominant Lynx on the precipice of defeat. Coming back from a 2-0 series deficit, the Marlins have stormed into the lead under the leadership of team stars Maxwell Mathias and Tavish DeGroot, and they are not looking back. Now, should this have been a massive surprise? To be frank, no. The Marlins have improved throughout the entire year, and have gone through a massive transition throughout the latter half of the year into a VHLM powerhouse in their own right. Most of this is as a result of shining new stars Scotty Sundin and Igor Molotov, but a vast majority of it has to do with the emergence of one specific player: Maxwell Mathias. Starting off as a role player, Mathias has grown into the centerpiece of this team, and has absolutely decimated the Ottawa defense all throughout this series. With his stunning play, we could be seeing a new superstar in the making. In general, we severely underestimated the offensive firepower of this Marlins team, and it could prove a fatal mistake for the Lynx, who now need to win the last two games of the series against Mathias and the Marlins to make it to the championships.

Review: The background of this graphic looks awesome. I love the brick wall and the logo on it looks super clean. The player is also added well, and I think that the chosen photo was a very good one. However, I think that the font choice was a mistake. The gross bulky font mixed with a dirty brown/yellow of another font hurts my eyes and I think that it would have looked better if just the white font was used. Overall, very good! 8/10

Review: Cool, just very cool. I love the graphic effects that create a ripple throughout the entire graphic. In addition, the colors and photoshopping are just perfect. The font adds in perfectly into all of it to make it an amazing graphic. Plus points because Reinhart was the name of the main character in a book I read today. 10/10

1. Honestly, it's awesome to be in the second round of the VHLM Playoffs for the second time. It's awesome to be able to compete with the team on the highest level, so I'm hyped that we can compete with the best teams in the nation. 2. The role of Marshall Maxx is simple and defined on this team: play defense. Even though he is often slotted into a role where he doesn't touch the puck, he has been a lockdown defender and a hard hitter for the team when he's out there. 3. Yes, they are the best team in the playoffs. They have so many experienced and skilled players and their team is extremely deep, which will make it extremely hard for any other VHLM team to compete with them in a seven game series. 4. Maxx had a great time eating through the large variety of chicken wings at the party. It was a bit unfortunate when he checked DeGroot's new television out the window though... 5. Edmonton should make the playoffs as long as they don't suck, which yaknow might happen. And Pittsburgh does stop winning, mostly cause they're not actually that good. 6. Probably A Silent Voice. But I also like Zodiac. And Jurassic Park. Idk I don't watch many movies though.

I’ve been covering the VHL for the last couple of months, but I finally realized something. Something is odd about every single player in the VHL, VHLE, and VHLM. I’ve seen hundreds of players be slammed into the ice at high velocity speeds and be crushed into the boards with immense force, but not once, not even one time, have I ever seen a player be injured in a VHL hockey game. Now, one may say that this is just due to luck, but I think not. The probability behind that is borderline impossible. In fact, there is a far better explanation for why no VHL player ever gets injured. That’s right, it’s not that every player in the VHL doesn’t get injured because they are extremely durable or that they are just extremely lucky, it’s that they are all robots! People will call me a conspiracy theorist, a madman, a crazed maniac, but they are all wrong. In fact, I am the only one that understands the truth behind this robot-filled league. Tell me this, have you ever seen the insides of a VHL player? No, right? That’s no coincidence, it’s because they would never let you see inside of them. And do you know why? That’s right! It’s because all that is inside of them is mechanical parts and gears. “But Lemon Man, they can’t be robots because they don’t shoot lasers out of their eyes!” you all say. Now, I was almost fooled by this truth, and it is extremely convincing, but then I realized it. The ice rink provides a perfect cooling effect for the robot body of these players, causing them to cool during practice and in games and thereby shutting down their laser systems. Through these simple facts, it is clear to me and should be clear to all of you, the VHL is full of robots, and I personally cannot stand by it. In order to solidify my argument, I had an interview with VHLM star Marshall Maxx and asked him a hard hitting question: “Are you a robot?” And in response he responded with a simple “No.” before walking away quickly, as if he was trying to hide something. Now, you may think that this is how a normal person would respond to this question, but I think not. No, this is what a robot would answer to this question in order to try to hide their identity as a robot! To be completely honest, I was not convinced of my theory before my interview with Marshall, but his answer solidified my argument completely and made it entirely clear that the VHL is full of robots. It is fully clear that every single player in the VHL, VHLE, and VHLM is definitively a robot. We need to rise up as a community and get to the bottom of this mystery. Anyone that disagrees with this is also most likely a robot, in fact, maybe everyone is a robot. Maybe I am a robot. Beep boop. Word Count: 505 Claiming for Week of 1/2

It's now been exactly two weeks since the last episode of the Duel Defense Podcast with Maxx and Johnson was aired, and fans of the ultra famous podcast are rampaging throughout the streets wondering where the next episode of the podcast is. In Houston and San Diego there have been riots occurring, with participants trying to figure out why the promised next episode of the podcast had not yet aired. Now, things are getting tense and we are left with only one question: "What is going on with the Duel Defense Podcast?!" There are rumors that an evil organization have kidnapped podcast cohost Connor Johnson and are holding him for ransom, purposely sabotaging the podcast in fear of its power. After his last game on the ice, Maxx was questioned regarding the mysterious circumstances of the podcast's disappearance, but quickly brushed off the question and rushed into the locker room. However, Johnson came out on Twitter today and announced that the podcast will officially resume this week after a short Christmas break. With this, fans are relieved and the podcast should continue as planned in the future.

Review: I really like all the choices made in this graphic. I love the overlaying color over the entire thing, and the logo and text placement makes it look awesome. In addition, the font color and choice is just perfect, which really makes the entire graphic come together. The one thing that takes away from the graphic is how artificial the jersey looks, but it is well hidden by the color scheme. Overall, very good! 9/10

Review: Honestly, this is the best graphic that I think I've ever reviewed. The choice of black and white, while simple, looks awesome, and the overall effects are nothing short of amazing. In addition, the font choice and shading are both really good, which imo is the most important thing for a good graphic. If I had to make one specific nitpick, it would be that the logo patch looks a little off when I zoomed in, but overall amazing! 9.99/10

1. They were cool. Pretty chill altogether, nothing too exciting but it was nice to have a break. 2. Having possession of my bean bag. Where I am now is lacking a bean bag. 3. The answer is finding a good rhythm and having every single one of our lines firing on all cylinders. With the teams that we will play in the playoffs this year, it's going to take an entire team effort to win. 4. Marshall Maxx has shown improvement, and that's for sure. However, I would like to see more hits in the future. As he moves to the VHLE, I expect him to put more effort into his bread and butter of slamming others into the boards. 5. In my opinion, it has to be Maxwell Mathias. He has shown the most growth and effort through the season, and he will be vital to our success in the playoffs. 6. During this time of year, I like just walking around while it is lightly snowing. In a warm jacket, it's kinda nice when it snows.

Into the Maxx: The Daily Diet of an Upcoming Star Introduction: Many may believe that the key behind Marshall Maxx’s bone crushing hits is lots of practice and a good amount of time in the weight room, and both of these are very true. However, in addition to these two, it is just as important for Maxx to follow a strict and disciplined diet in order to become as strong and fit as possible. In this episode of Into the Maxx, we interviewed Marshall Maxx about his daily eating habits and got a bit more understanding into the eating habits of your favorite hockey stars. Breakfast: While most people probably eat things like cereal, a few eggs, or pancakes for breakfast, Marshall Maxx does things a bit different. In our interview, he noted that “Things that are not meat are for the weak. The average person’s breakfast does not have close to enough meat. To be frank, I don’t know how people like that exist.” Continuing on, he explained his average breakfast meal. “First, I go out to the farm and grab a mountain of eggs from the cages. Then, I scramble them up with about fifty slices of bacon and one hundred links of sausage, no more and no less. On a cheat day, I’ll allow myself a slice of toast, but that’s a rare treat.” Lunch: After a good six hours of weight lifting in the morning, Maxx fairly gets a bit of an appetite for lunch. At lunchtime, Maxx usually has a good meal of homemade rotisserie chicken. In our interview, he recounted to us about his average lunch: “Yeah, I go out to the farm after my training and I grab a few chickens. Oh, how many? Umm, well, if I’m not hungry… probably around twenty. But if I’m hungry that can go up to fifty. It just gets a bit pricey around there, even my VHL salary isn’t enough for that. I butcher ‘em real quick, and then I cook them up in the rotisserie oven. After that, I get a quick drink, a gallon of protein shakes, and get ready for practice." After Practice: After a good practice or a game, Maxx drinks exactly two gallons of milk to strengthen his bones. After a good win last week, the rest of the Marlins locker room cheered on Maxx as he chugged down the milk in celebration. In addition, Maxx has a tradition when he gets home, telling us: “When I get home after working myself to the limit, which is of course every day, I’ll take a quick trip to the local grocery store and buy out their entire stock of protein bars and steak. Then, I’ll get my personal chef to cook up the steak and have everything as a good filling dinner. Of course, I need a bit of water to rinse my throat with all the protein bars, but I also add protein powder to that to maximize efficiency.” In Conclusion: In short, we were shocked at the amount of food that Maxx is able to eat on a daily basis. Our math team did the calculations, and the total amount of calories that Maxx averages per day is more than 300,000. He is a freak of nature, and one that cannot be understood by doctors. He should be dead by now. When questioned about what he thought about his diet, Maxx replied “In the end, I think my daily meal is pretty healthy, but I think I tend to eat that piece of toast at breakfast a little too often.” This man is insane. Is it safe to be near him? No, opposing players should be terrified of this man on the ice. 624 words, claiming for week of 12/26

In the last edition of the Duel Defense Podcast featuring Maxx and Johnson (check it out), a large commotion rippled throughout the VHLM with the announcement of the official Maxx's Kiss Award. Awarded to only the best of the best and treasured among all professional hockey stars, the Maxx's Kiss Award is given from podcast cohost Marshall Maxx to an upcoming star that has great potential to shine in the VHL. While the Founders Cup and VHLM awards are a cool, the Maxx's Kiss Award is in a league above them. In addition to it being extremely rare in general, there are rumors that VHL GM's are looking at recipients of the award as the top prospects in the upcoming draft, as they should be. Marshall Maxx has shown to be a very reputable source, developing very quickly as a star player for the San Diego Marlins this season. While the award has only been given to one player so far, Jared Carter the 2st, he already looks to be on a clear track to be a VHL superstar. In the end, GM's will be watching out for who Maxx gives the extremely desired award to, and these players will be on a clear track to be the next stars of the VHL.

Review: Honestly, I know it is a first time attempt and the resolution is a result of the app you use, but the graphic in general looks awesome. I love the pixel font, and it is a choice that I don't see very often. I think the pixely look makes for an overall very good look, and makes it almost seem like a pixel video game. You could have added some cool extra effects, but overall very good! 8/10

Review: First of all, it looks awesome. The effects you chose adds a lot to the graphic and the photo you chose is just really cool in general. However, I think it struggles from a poor choice of font. I am honestly really picky when it comes to font and font color, and I think that the font choice in specific hurts this graphic. Overall though, very good! 7/10

1. I feel like the team is a lot more well rounded with Scotty and Igor here. I think it really fills in the holes of the team and could make us a lot scarier to go against in the playoffs. 2. Listening to Morshu's Paradise. Absolute classic. Also eating cool food. 3. I'm just hanging out with a break from a lot of work. I still do a lot of more fun stuff just to get myself going, but mostly just relaxing. 4. I don't really get being excited for a new year, but I'm excited for what's to come in the near future! 5. Go Red Wings! Honestly I don't really care about the NHL besides the Red Wings rn, but they have been awesome to watch this year. 6. Umm, depends who I am playing against. If they seem pretty smart, rock paper scissors. Otherwise, tic tac toe.