Fare Thee Well

[Gustav 6,407]

With Davos being curbstomped in the wildcard round by Warsaw (well done by @dlamb and company), my GM career is officially over. I've already gone over my reasons why in my resignation announcement, and I plan to write an article at some point about the ups and downs of my time as GM in two different leagues, but there are some general thoughts about it that are probably best suited for an article of their own about what it means to be a GM and how my experience intersected with that.

 

New Gustav had this big idea that one's own status in the league was closely tied to one's own role. I looked up to GMs, I looked up to commissioners, and I wanted to be any role I could. Not necessarily because I wanted to be in those roles (though I did and do want to be in some, for sure), but because I didn't think I was seen as good enough and felt I needed to prove myself as legitimate. Ironically, that may have been what got me so interested in the league to begin with. I felt a need to stand out with the content that I created, which made me pay attention, which led to me actually caring. And I was really hyped to get my first GM job, half because I thought it was cool and half because I thought that meant the league thought I was cool. That didn't quite go away when I moved up, either--I'm of the opinion that moving from the VHLM to the VHL shouldn't be seen as a "promotion" of any sort, because it's a bit disrespectful to the people who run VHLM teams and care about them, but there's no question that higher-level jobs are in higher demand and come with more prestige and I considered that a bonus.

 

That's not to say at all that I didn't care about the teams that I was running, or that I was only in it for my own image. I think I was in it for my own image enough that it's worth recognizing and talking about, because the whole "my worth is determined by my job" thing is a super common misconception. Trust me, I've seen way too many people explode when GM hirings don't go the way they want to think otherwise. There are people without jobs who I respect quite a bit, and people with jobs who I respect a bit less. To someone new, sure, GMs and such are noticed easily and valued for their jobs, but I think anyone with a well-developed understanding of the league will care who you are and what you do to make our community a better place much more than they'll care what color your name is on the forum. We're getting a bit off the GM topic, but I think it's relevant. I'm happy with where I am in the community, and even though it might have been misguided, I'm missing the drive to prove that I'm worth it--for the right reason that I think I've already done that.

 

And I think that may have partly contributed to my interest dropping off. I've recognized for the past few seasons that I haven't tried to be competitive as much as I did in the past. Taking over the franchise, I (and many others) had this big expectation that I'd make the team great, and it didn't work that way. Fine. But as opposed to making whatever moves I could to change things, and being upset by my losses, as I did in the early S70s, I found myself almost being OK with being mediocre and accepting it for what it was. I'd made my mark on Davos, but it was in terms of restoring leaguewide respect for the franchise rather than winning championships. And I'd learned to be cool with that, which was great--it just didn't leave me with a clear objective. I'd already done my big thing for the franchise, and winning wasn't it. 

 

One thing that I will miss about being a GM, and something that I think will probably draw me back in at some point, is that it's really cool to be the top representative of an entire franchise. Selfish perceptions of me aside, it's a chance to put a team in the spotlight and make people want to be there. On top of that, there's a certain loyalty beyond anything I'd get from a player--for the past 12 seasons, I was Davos, whether I played here or not. I'll always appreciate the opportunity I got to experience that.

 

So, goodbye to this GM career! I think I made the right choice for myself for the time being, but it was cool for me and I hope the league has no regrets.

[frescoelmo 1,276]

[BOOM 8,745]

@GustavMattias

 

Thank you for your service, and because you deserve a decent send off...