AIM-11 134 Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 In a recent game in Oslo, a fan was injured by a puck that missed some of the back netting, bounced off of a girder high up in the stands and then landed on an infant who was brought to the game. Startled by the falling puck, the infant cried and the man holding the infant, who was doing so because his wife was going pee, yelled. His yell startled the little boy next to him who was holding his dad's beer and the boy spilled the beer on an extremely fat man in the row in front of him. The man turned around to fight the boy but due to his obesity related heart condition he suffered a heart attack and fell backward onto the row below him and crushed an old lady's cat who had been smuggled into the arena. As a result of this awkward tragedy, the VHLM has put forth a few new safety proposals for games. 1) Personal bubble wrap for all patrons 2) Virtual pucks instead of real pucks. 3) Players will now stay at home and sim all games on the internet. 4) Fat fans will need to pass through a special doorway that will entrap them if they weigh too much and send them sliding to the basement where they will be trapped until the end of the game. 5) Pets will be allowed, but only if they wear fan clothing. Hopefully these new changes will make for an improved safety level for all patrons of the game, should they come to pass. scoop and CoachReilly 2 Link to comment https://vhlforum.com/topic/13103-new-safety-standards-for-vhlm/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jala 922 Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 What the fuck did i just read Link to comment https://vhlforum.com/topic/13103-new-safety-standards-for-vhlm/#findComment-135616 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Senior Admin Will 4,662 Posted October 11, 2014 Senior Admin Share Posted October 11, 2014 Only in Oslo. Jala and CoachReilly 2 Link to comment https://vhlforum.com/topic/13103-new-safety-standards-for-vhlm/#findComment-135687 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Higgins 3,618 Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 #3 seems reasonable Victor 1 Link to comment https://vhlforum.com/topic/13103-new-safety-standards-for-vhlm/#findComment-135694 Share on other sites More sharing options...
eaglesfan036 4,605 Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 u forgot to add riggery Link to comment https://vhlforum.com/topic/13103-new-safety-standards-for-vhlm/#findComment-135698 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin Victor 11,015 Posted October 12, 2014 Admin Share Posted October 12, 2014 RIP random smuggled in cat. Forever in our hearts, the driver of change for the good. Link to comment https://vhlforum.com/topic/13103-new-safety-standards-for-vhlm/#findComment-135989 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Da Trifecta 1,902 Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 RIP fat guy who just wanted a cheeseburger Link to comment https://vhlforum.com/topic/13103-new-safety-standards-for-vhlm/#findComment-135991 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin Victor 11,015 Posted October 12, 2014 Admin Share Posted October 12, 2014 I think there was only fatality. Link to comment https://vhlforum.com/topic/13103-new-safety-standards-for-vhlm/#findComment-135994 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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