rory talk about us of a world championship

[rory 1,916]

After the success of my last article, rory talk about mexico (2020), I feel it is only fitting to release the sequel: rory talk about us of a world championship. Despite being by far the best representative of the VHL and rising and grinding young management prospects, I was disrespected by the hiring committee, and absolutely humiliated. Thankfully, our gracious chairman @Banackock  decided to rectify the commies decision and has named me vice chairman of the US of A WC (water closet) team. Without further ado, let us discuss select pieces of the great yankee squad. 

D - MICHAEL GARY SCOTT @Motzaburger
Terrible choice here, guy's been on a decline since he left Vancouver and has been absolutely embarrassing himself on the New York blue line. An embarrassment to all of Pennsylvania, and thus all of America. Probably the Scranton Strangler, but I cannot reveal my sources on that one. Go back to Wilkes-Bare dweeb. I predict Scott will get injured during warmups of our first game and never return to the United States out of shame. (love u motza pls come back)

C - Scott Greene @DoktorFunk
The first actual corpse that team US of A will be icing, Greene comes out of retirement to represent America. Greene has been known to re-invent his playstyle on the ice, repeatedly switching from cleanest man on the ice, to goon, and back again. His career high 105 points came in S73 before those filthy Canadians absolutely ruined his development and he dropped off a cliff for S74. Which Greene will team US of A receive for this tournament? Goon or scorer? The pride of Virginia looks to add to his 4 continental cup victories with this gold medal. I'm looking for Greene to match his career high in both points and hits this tournament, but I think he will exceed both of these expectations.

C - Benny Graves @STZ
Playing for the great American D.C. Dragons, Graves has proven himself to be one of the top players in the entire league, and his locker room presence will help motivate the American squad. Despite being a consistent scorer with D.C., Graves finds himself with zero awards, and only 33 career playoff games. I hope this will motivate Benny, but his limited high pressure experience may be a liability against top (but still lesser then America) teams. I will be disappointed by anything less then 60 goals and 400 points during this tournament, and I know that may seem a little high to the casual viewer, but when you look at the advanced analytics like corsi and WAR, you easily come to this conclusion as well.

In conclusion, the American squad may possibly be the greatest world championship team of all time and I will be disappointed if the tournament isn't cancelled after our first game, a 5000-0 victory over team Canada out of pure shame that other countries could even compete against us. Bana will be named greatest executive of all time and the builder section of the hall of fame will be renamed in honour of him.

[Banackock 8,050]

USA USA USA

[Toast 887]

Enjoy your 6th-place finish  

[hylands 845]

congratulations for reach the 500 word limit and claim six total points earned

[STZ 5,360]

I’ll show you a high pressure situation...